Code Name: S.T.E.A.M.

2015 has not been a great year for me and turn-based tactical games. Aside from the systems-heavy, 110% Anime stylings of Disgaea 5 (which I’ve found surprisingly enjoyable thus far), I’ve found this year to be lacking in grid-based strategizing that I can get behind. Invisible Inc’s mix of tactics, stealth and roguelike elements left me a bit cold, but I can understand why someone would like it. I couldn’t say as much for Double Fine’s second crowdfunded game, Massive Chalice, which I found a shallow and underwhelming attempt to make a game like XCOM (but with eugenics). That leads me to Code Name S.T.E.A.M, a game released earlier this year and developed by Intelligent Systems, the Nintendo studio responsible for Paper Mario, Advance Wars and Fire Emblem. You would think that a game from that studio featuring a steampunk team of public-domain literary characters fighting aliens and led by Abraham Lincoln, clearly inspired by Valkyira Chronicles with just a touch of XCOM, would be right up my alley. Surprisingly… no. Not really. While conceptually sound, from a mechanical and presentational angle S.T.E.A.M. squanders both gameplay and story in favor of being mostly boring. It’s hardly the worst tactics game I’ve played this year, but “hardly the worst” doesn’t make for a strong recommendation.

As I mentioned, Code Name S.T.E.A.M. has a pretty clear but not overwhelming influence in Sega’s Valkyria Chronicles, their series of Anime WW II tactical games with a long-suffering fanbase (which I guess could be said for every Sega franchise that isn’t Total War). You control a small squad of soldiers from a mostly 3rd person behind-the-back perspective, allowing the player to aim and shoot like it was one of those 3rd person aim-y, shoot-y games I’m told the kids are into these days. But turn-based. And with action points. Your crew of colorful copyright-free characters canters ‘cross gridded maps fighting the alien invaders, each with their own personal weapon and one sub-weapon from an arsenal that increases as you get more coins. They also all have their own personal ultimate ability which can be used once per map. There’s an okay variety to the primary weapons and super abilities of your crew (though some characters are far more useful than others), but there’s not a ton of meaningful progression in that from start to end. You get more characters, boilers (my hot hint for that is to pick the ones that give you the most action points per-turn) and sub-weapons (half of which are of dubious usefulness), though I switched up my squad more for variety’s sake than strategy.

That said, while the character management stuff is a little undercooked for my tastes as someone who likes “numbers ‘n shit”, the real culprit for this game’s general dullness is the map design. I found two optimal ways to play Code Name S.T.E.A.M depending on the map in question, sometimes with a mix of both. Either you go super slow with your dudes in constant overwatch, a safe and dull strategy that is only occasionally hampered by cheap enemy reinforcements or a cheesetacular berserker blitz with the goal of getting a character to the goal ASAP (most maps require you to just reach a certain square), with some heavy abuse of the way the mid-map save points allow you to fully recover your squad’s health and “Steam Units” for an increasing but not unpayable fee every time. In that way, I guess it hearkens back to the way you can win a fair share of maps in Valkyira Chronicles (the first one) via bum-rushing the enemy with your scouts. The game tries to prevent this by throwing in more than its fair share of jerks in near-permanent overwatch, waiting to nail you from behind a corner, but that’s when you revert to paranoid turtle mode or flush them out with stun/explosive weapons. I guess what I’m trying to say is that there’s zero finesse in the way Code Name S.T.E.A.M. is played. It’s not without some tactical considerations, but said considerations are to be solved with a blunt instrument -- the same blunt instrument -- from level to level. There are also a handful of half-assed “action” boss fights, but those are so laughably easy they almost aren’t worth mentioning.

The squandered potential of Code Name S.T.E.A.M. also extends to the story and setting, which despite having a fair share of styyyyyyle (alongside a fairly striking comic-book aesthetic) doesn’t really do anything with it. There’s something to be said for reigning it in with your world-building, not every game needs a Bioware level of self-indulgent lore dumping. There’s another thing to be said for having nothing to compensate other than the mildly entertaining weight of the premise. For a game that has Tom Sawyer hanging out with John Henry and a gender-swapped version of Zorro in Steampunk Americana alternate history, the story sure lacks any sort of personality beyond bland, mildly goofy “Aliens! Lovecraft References! Abraham Lincoln! Mild Jingoism!” Even the intolerable walking anime archetypes of Valkyria Chronicles II are more interesting by simple value of that game actually doing stuff with its characters. The cast of S.T.E.A.M, by comparison, are a handful of mildly obnoxious combat barks and a few lines when they’re introduced into the story. That leaves a skeleton of a plot, which might as well be every alien invasion story ever because it’s not like the game does anything interesting with the steampunk stuff either.

I don’t think Code Name S.T.E.A.M. is an unsalvageable mess. It's more mediocre than outright bad, but it’s certainly not good. There are better strategy games on the 3DS (Fire Emblem, for example) and while it only took me a dozen hours to complete (keeping in mind that they patched in the ability to drastically speed up enemy turns from the insultingly lethargic pace it used to be. I make no exaggeration when I say the game would’ve been multiple hours longer if I had played it unpatched) I could’ve spent my time better elsewhere than playing a bland facsimilie of Valkyria Chronicles and XCOM while generic, unfitting buttrock plays in the background. The same goes for Intelligent Systems. It’s been like 8 years since the last Advance Wars. They should make a new one of those. Juuuuuust saying.