Split my lip (Guess how)

Didn't do it in a fight. 
Didn't do it saving someone whilst wearing a cape.
Didn't do it wrestling a bear for money.
 
Did it while moving a tower fan, fan hit my wall. Knocking a framed picture off my wall. It maliciously attacked my face.  The following is the result.
                                                                       

Nice.  Did you attack back? 

...cool story bro. 
 
And I never say "cool story bro".

dang you're like a national hero now. that's how it works right?

you should sue the picture frame company for making shitty pictures that fall on you....

Oh my god, are you ok? 
Was the blood loss severe in the sense that you might die?! 

In an overly dramatic sense absolutely. I will die and you'll miss me when I'm gone!!!

You have a purrty mouth 
 
wait what? 
 
also, tell the ladies you either got it in a fight, saving someone's life, or wrestling a bear for money

Does it in anyway have anything to do with your avatar? :)

ouuuuuuu nice face

Does it in anyway have anything to do with your avatar? :)

Tell the bitches you got in a sick knife fight against some KGB thugs that were riding bear cavalry!

Whits not nearly as good as jeff's story of falling face first into cow shit, the image of that happening sucks :|