I'm Commander Shepard and welcome to Jackass.
Mass Effect 3
Game » consists of 19 releases. Released Mar 06, 2012
When Earth begins to fall in an ancient cycle of destruction, Commander Shepard must unite the forces of the galaxy to stop the Reapers in the final chapter of the original Mass Effect trilogy.
The ending of Mass Effect 3 in one line
@Pinworm45 said:
"I will direct this personally".
This is the line I feel sums it up, because I have disregarded their ending and substituted it with my own.
Also, I legitimately think I could have done a better job with the last 10 minutes than them.
This is what happens when you let Hamburger Hepler assume control.
I actually just like saying Hamburger Hepler, don't really hold her responsible for this mess.
Instantly: I'm not sure what just happened, but those fights in the streets of London were cool.
Now: I waited three games for this?
@Sooty said:
@Animasta said:
@Sooty: saying it is still super insulting towards her no matter what context it's in actually
I think after all the Twitter stuff she should be fairly thick skinned by now, leave my fondness for that stupid name alone.
She looked fairly thick skinned before the twitter stuff.
DLC shepard breaks the fourth wall and talks to the camera. Says he is making his own ending - Mass space orgy. He goes stretch Armstrong and controls the reapers with one hand, kills them with the other and puts his junk in the white light.
@Sooty said:
@Animasta said:
@Sooty: saying it is still super insulting towards her no matter what context it's in actually
I think after all the Twitter stuff she should be fairly thick skinned by now, leave my fondness for that stupid name alone.
Bad treatment from others doens't necessarily make you thick-skinned. Sometimes it just makes you bitter and frustrated and cynical and antisocial. Most people are more sensitive than they seem/act. Just saying.
9.5/10 one of the finest stories ever told in gaming history editor's choice buy now at gamestop. Oh wait, that was IGN, my bad.
@Sooty : The meme is actually Hamburger Helper. She didn't write for ME3 though, that's somebody else's mess.
As opposed to "Robots are evil, fuck them. By the way, I hope you didn't build your civilization around mass relays, because they're gone. Later, assholes."
I can get it down to two words:
Nothing Matters.
You could have played ME1 full Renegade, had everyone but one character die in the end of ME2 and done the bare minimum of quests needed to get to the end of ME3, killing the Krogran and the Geth in the process. Or, you could have played ME1 full paragon, saved everyone in ME2, done everything in ME3 and ended the Quarian/Geth war.
None of that matters, you get the same pallet swap endings.
And if people can't figure out why THAT is so upsetting to us hardcore fans, then they're just being jerks.
More like: Yo Dawg, I heard you don't wanna have all organic life in the universe destroyed by synthetics, so I made some synthetics to kill everyone but the least advanced lifeforms every 50K years, so all organic life in the universe won't be destroyed by synthetics.@CaptainCharisma said:
Going to be honest, this would have made that ending go down a LOT easier.
And my ending in one line: A poorly explained and difficult decision must be made, resulting in a vague and unsatisfying conclusion.
A more positive ending in one line: It's about the journey, not the destination.
On second though, I'll spoiler it... even though you shouldn't be in this thread if you haven't finished it...
"I'm really tired of writing this story, can we get someone from Team Ninja or Capcom to come write the last, I don't know, ten or so minutes?"
@Vegetable_Side_Dish said:
9.5/10 one of the finest stories ever told in gaming history editor's choice buy now at gamestop. Oh wait, that was IGN, my bad.
@Sooty : The meme is actually Hamburger Helper. She didn't write for ME3 though, that's somebody else's mess.
Actually no it's totally Hamburger Hepler, that's the whole point. If it was Hamburger Helper, it wouldn't be a pun.
No no no...the joke is that her name is Hepler, and people turned it around to make 'Helper'.@Vegetable_Side_Dish said:
9.5/10 one of the finest stories ever told in gaming history editor's choice buy now at gamestop. Oh wait, that was IGN, my bad.
@Sooty : The meme is actually Hamburger Helper. She didn't write for ME3 though, that's somebody else's mess.Actually no it's totally Hamburger Hepler, that's the whole point. If it was Hamburger Helper, it wouldn't be a pun.
Hamburger Helper is a food product: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamburger_Helper
That is where the meme comes form.
It originated on 4chan, I believe.
http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/220/1300474624648.jpg/
@Silvergun said:
@CaptainCharisma said:
Going to be honest, this would have made that ending go down a LOT easier.
I haven't played ME3, but saw this meme last week when the game released. It obviously makes zero sense, but I was intrigued. "There's no way that's the actual ending," I thought.
So I watched all the Youtube videos, read all the various synopses that are out there.
I'm still in shock that, yes, that is basically the ending. Was going to buy the GOTY edition after enjoying the first two games, but now I don't think I care at all.
@GreatNorthern: Yeah, I hear that.
I actually thought the ending was outstanding, and was about to come to the conclusion that the internet didn't know what it was talking about...then all the BS started. Then the credits rolled and Bioware decided to give me a second helping of BS. Sad really, I loved where they were going before it went off the rails.
@Silvergun said:
@GreatNorthern: Yeah, I hear that.
I actually thought the ending was outstanding, and was about to come to the conclusion that the internet didn't know what it was talking about...then all the BS started. Then the credits rolled and Bioware decided to give me a second helping of BS. Sad really, I loved where they were going before it went off the rails.
This is what makes it so much worse. I was really loving the game up until... I guess you encounter the Reapified Illusive Man. Yes, there were some things I didn't like (EDI is the first thing that comes to mind), but I accepted it. I too was thinking "This is GREAT!" and then... It feels like they gave up at that point. I love the idea of the final showdown being in dialogue, it was so fitting for the series, but the whole conversation felt silly. Then, we encounter the magic little boy, and he gives you choices which all suck. I think I sat staring at the screen trying to take it all in for at least 10 minutes. Finally, no matter what you choose, you get almost the exact same ending scene, and it feels dumb.
Before I saw the ending, I spend about 30 hours anticipating an epilogue that would detail what happens to my surviving comrades, what happens as the civilizations in the galaxy rebuild. I wanted to know what impact the reaper invasion would have on the galaxy, how the different races would go on, what impact saving the Krogan, Geth, and Quarians might have on galactic politics. There was so much I couldn't wait to learn about. I had heard that the ending was bad, but I didn't really care, because the aftermath was more important to me. The little details were always the most intriguing part of the Mass Effect games. Bioware killed my dreams. Honestly, the best possible ending would have been the simplest: they build the Crucible, which turns the tide of the war, and they defeat the reapers. The end. Nothing crazy. And then they live happily ever after.
@CharlesAlanRatliff: Just saw you posted this after I wrote my rant. This is actually a pretty accurate summation of how I feel.
@Silvergun said:
@GreatNorthern: Yeah, I hear that.
I actually thought the ending was outstanding, and was about to come to the conclusion that the internet didn't know what it was talking about...then all the BS started. Then the credits rolled and Bioware decided to give me a second helping of BS. Sad really, I loved where they were going before it went off the rails.
One of the reasons the ending is so disappointing is because up till that point, the game's story is fantastic. I was thinking to myself, "Man, this is great. This scene is really powerful and full of emotion. Wait, why is Shepard being lifted up by a floor panel?"
I have mixed feelings about the ending, on one hand i liked but wish it had a lot more closure. I think the moral that Bioware was going for is there are forces in the universe that you just can't control.
That said, i gotta say that i liked the ending of ME2 a lot better than this. ME3 was a nice culmination of all the decisions you made in ME1 and 2 but the ending felt rushed.
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