I present to you my latest attempt to pitch a video game. 
 
Assassin's Creed: Animus Trainer   
 
With Assassin's Creed: Animus Trainer, exclusively for Kinect,  you are the Desmond in this fun, active and engaging fitness game from the fine people that brought you Learn Italian with Ezio and History: A Templar's Version of Events. Run, jump, duck, dive, run and free run inside the Animus with a wide range of activities and routines. You know what they say: Exercise and an Apple of Eden a day keeps the Templars away! 
 
To spice things up you can enter the 'Combat Arena', shouting "Hidden Blade on" not only sounds fucking cool but you'll be able to test your strength against a varied array of enemies from previous Assassin's Creed games. Cameos include, the dude on a horse from Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood and Generic Guard 7 from the original Assassin's Creed.  Titling your head violently and awkwardly from side to side activates Eagle Vision, the perfect tool for scanning your surroundings. Get handy exercise tips from Subject 16 although you'll have to solve a series of inexplicably difficult puzzles first.  
 
Assassin's Creed: Animus Trainer is the perfect way to have fun and stay in shape because let's be realistic, you're not going to beat the Templars sitting in a chair all day, are you? 
 
Also coming soon: Subject 16's Photo Hunt Adventure.
 

So, I take it you don't like Kinect.

hmmm