Last night, I had some weird dreams. I can't even remember their order since they're little vignettes and not episodes proper. I'm just gonna record them here, k? Feel free to share your own in the comments.

In the first, I was a contestant on American Idol. The girls had their own stage, while the guys (that's me) had to perform in my aunt's kitchen. The theme was apparently "Roz 'n' Roll," whatever that means. Lil Rounds or someone who looks like her was naked on all fours for half of her song, which I can't remember. It was some jazzy number, but I couldn't tell exactly what it was. I was behind her the whole time, so I was staring at her naked butt. Lovely. The other half was spent spooning with Simon Cowell who fortunately realized how positively ridiculous this whole thing was and laughed through the performance. I should probably mention that she was on top and the stage was rotating.

Cut to my aunt's kitchen. This part is in the first-person perspective. It's dark and lit only by a couple of candles I'm bent over the sink, trying to remember my song, when my parents, who are apparently the judges now, tell me that whatever song I picked doesn't work with the theme. I grasp desperately for a song and finally come up with Accidentally in Love by the Counting Crows. I sing it, I can feel my vocal cords vibrating and my throat moving as I completely kick ASS at that song. It was very realistic and sounded completely awesome and I forgot I was dreaming and convinced myself that I was actually singing Accidentally in Love into my aunt's kitchen sink on American Idol. The Judgeparents say that it wasn't very good and I didn't do enough to get into the next round :(

Afterwards, they ask me who the other two contestants are.  I tell them it's a Mexican bald guy with dents in his head and an emo with either yellow (not blonde, canary yellow) or green hair. Apparently they accept this and that's where that dream ends.

In my other dream, I have my friend D, my friend A, and A's imaginary girlfriend over. We're chilling out in my room when A gets horny and tells us to leave. We accept this and relocate to my brother's room. About ten minutes later, I knock on the door and A's girlfriend answers. D's already there in wet boxers, A and his girlfriend are in their underwear and I just noticed that not only am I in my underwear but also my room is next to a major highway and this trucker guy is checking me out. He drives off and the dream ends with us playing Left 4 Dead.

That's about it.