My Night With Kevin Smith in Portland, OR

 What is an evening with Kevin Smith like in person? For a couple hours of a semi-famous guy to just stand on stage and answer questions it may seem over priced at $60 (after fees) but the truth is that you are under paying if you pay $100.

In short, make no mistake that a live Evening With Kevin Smith is the best time you will ever have....if you like Kevin Smith.

You see, if you know Kevin Smith from his movies, Twitter, SModcast, and previous Q&A DVDs and if that's your idea of funny then you will shit your pants laughing in person. If his stuff isn't your thing then it'll be hours of tedium and frustration.

The entire thing begins some what like a business meeting: the lighting doesn't change and a guy just says "Ladies and gentlemen, Kevin Smith" and then he just steps on stage and doesn't stop for over 3 hours. Once he got the audience back in their seats and quiet he lubricated the evening by telling a story about how gay his friend Malcolm Ingrim is and how the gay community classifies fat men as bears. This story takes maybe 15 minutes and then he says he's talked long enough and it's time for questions. Our first question involved who was the hardest entity to work with on a movie, be it an actor, studio, or whatever. This prompted a 40 minute story about making Cop Out with Bruce Willis and included a great impersonation of Mr. Willis. It's hilarious and I hope it shows up on the likely to be forthcoming 4th Evening With DVD.

Other topics covered included his stand off with a Good Morning America camera man, how there's no record stores anymore (except the one right out the window and across the street from the venue), his favorite scene in his Batman mini-series comic, and a variety of random other topics which mostly excluded his recent tangle with Southwest Airlines. Half the fun was also hearing people trying their hardest to make an impression in front of such a open and famous dude. An example was a guy who walked up to the mike and proclaimed he had a monologue to read Kevin and then spewed a few minutes of rambling nonsense about the audience member, Jason Mewes, and Kevin Smith breaking into a head shop and stealing a bunch of weed.

If Kevin Smith happens near you then I would recommend you do everything in your power to go, it's probably the best time I've had in my life. And speaking of weed, wait until you hear his grand finale tale of his first two experiences with smoking pot with his wife on their rare weekends without their daughter in the house. There is NO WAY this story doesn't make it to the next DVD and once you see it you'll be laughing to yourself for weeks and repeating "It's ropey, it's ropey" much to the confusion of those around you.

Kevin Smith, thank you sir and I hope you make it back to Portland soon!

10 Comments
10 Comments
Posted by NinjaTard

 What is an evening with Kevin Smith like in person? For a couple hours of a semi-famous guy to just stand on stage and answer questions it may seem over priced at $60 (after fees) but the truth is that you are under paying if you pay $100.

In short, make no mistake that a live Evening With Kevin Smith is the best time you will ever have....if you like Kevin Smith.

You see, if you know Kevin Smith from his movies, Twitter, SModcast, and previous Q&A DVDs and if that's your idea of funny then you will shit your pants laughing in person. If his stuff isn't your thing then it'll be hours of tedium and frustration.

The entire thing begins some what like a business meeting: the lighting doesn't change and a guy just says "Ladies and gentlemen, Kevin Smith" and then he just steps on stage and doesn't stop for over 3 hours. Once he got the audience back in their seats and quiet he lubricated the evening by telling a story about how gay his friend Malcolm Ingrim is and how the gay community classifies fat men as bears. This story takes maybe 15 minutes and then he says he's talked long enough and it's time for questions. Our first question involved who was the hardest entity to work with on a movie, be it an actor, studio, or whatever. This prompted a 40 minute story about making Cop Out with Bruce Willis and included a great impersonation of Mr. Willis. It's hilarious and I hope it shows up on the likely to be forthcoming 4th Evening With DVD.

Other topics covered included his stand off with a Good Morning America camera man, how there's no record stores anymore (except the one right out the window and across the street from the venue), his favorite scene in his Batman mini-series comic, and a variety of random other topics which mostly excluded his recent tangle with Southwest Airlines. Half the fun was also hearing people trying their hardest to make an impression in front of such a open and famous dude. An example was a guy who walked up to the mike and proclaimed he had a monologue to read Kevin and then spewed a few minutes of rambling nonsense about the audience member, Jason Mewes, and Kevin Smith breaking into a head shop and stealing a bunch of weed.

If Kevin Smith happens near you then I would recommend you do everything in your power to go, it's probably the best time I've had in my life. And speaking of weed, wait until you hear his grand finale tale of his first two experiences with smoking pot with his wife on their rare weekends without their daughter in the house. There is NO WAY this story doesn't make it to the next DVD and once you see it you'll be laughing to yourself for weeks and repeating "It's ropey, it's ropey" much to the confusion of those around you.

Kevin Smith, thank you sir and I hope you make it back to Portland soon!

Posted by emkeighcameron

Dammit, I'm about to move to Portland in like 3 months
 
I totally would've seen him

Edited by nick_verissimo

Man, you're so lucky.  I've always wanted to go to one of these things but the couple of times he's come to my neck of the woods I've got school or work interfering.  I've got one question though....how fat is he in person?  I don't mean to say that in a negative light, but from listening to SMOD, his girth seems legendary.

Posted by Arkasai

Too bad no one interesting ever comes to Hawaii to perform...just to kick back.  I'd love to see him live, he's razor sharp and quick on his feet.

Posted by damnboyadvance

I have a friend named Kevin Smith.

Posted by jakob187

I've thoroughly enjoyed all three of his "Evening with Kevin Smith" DVDs.  Listening to him talk for hours is usually a great time-killer.  The first one is still the best, but the second one does have that whole England show on it, which was hilarious as well.

Posted by NinjaTard

He's a big dude but his audience definitely had some whales which made him look anoxexic....which is to say he's not giant or anything. It's kind of hard to tell how fat he really is since he wore his trademark shorts, overcoat, and backward cap (which was really freakin' cool, if I may say so). 
 
As for missing previous shows because of school or whatever.....let me suggest next time it might be worth ditching class? I know that's not very responsible of me to say but he doesn't do many live shows and when he does it's usually LA or Redbanks, NJ with the scattered and seemingly random stops in between so....yeah, I would see him. He did just over 3 hours for us and it felt like an eternity in a good way. He's just a fascinating chap with tons of stories and an uncanny ability to make his stories come to life. 
 
I'm gushing now...sorry, but this is going to be one of those watershed moments of entertainment in my life.
Posted by Lowbrow
@Arkasai said:
" Too bad no one interesting ever comes to Hawaii to perform...just to kick back.  I'd love to see him live, he's razor sharp and quick on his feet. "
I know what you mean, but this still made me lol.
Posted by Coombs

He's the only person my facebook page says I'm a fan of.....
Also I hate facebook and never use it, So the fact he's on there is really saying something.
Also, PorchMonkey

Posted by Hot_Karl
@NinjaTard: That's awesome! 
 
I unfortunately didn't have enough money to go see him when he hit my area last year, but I'm hoping to see him...eventually. I need a buddy to go with me though.