Happy February 20th or why Giantbomb is the best dating site ever
By Snipzor 9 Comments
Today is an important day, possibly the most important of my life at this exact moment. It's the one year anniversary of the best day I could ever have. The only way to explain it is with a hopefully not too long post, that may or may not be posted on the forums. I'll need requests so that I can garner the courage to repost. Hopefully it'll explain why I always come here despite seldom posting, hopefully. Anyways, here goes nothing.
Conclusion to a nightmare
Nearing the end of November, I made possibly the worst mistake of my life, sequentially ruining friendships and future ambitions. Perhaps my story is somewhere in the internet, I won't share any details. But I had made plans to spend a bit of the day with a very cute guy, and one I definitely had a crush on. It's definitely childish, but it gets worse. I had done something extremely wrong right at the start, I initiated the day. Let's just say for the entire day, I had thought to myself how idiotic I was and how nothing good would possibly come out of my stupidities. Suffice it to say, I was right, nothing to be proud of there. After that day, I was confronted about it, and subsequently ruined a friendship. Normally, I wouldn't care, but I was turning around to being more social. As a result, after that day I had gone into a horrible depression. One that lasted the better part of a few months. I lost my job eventually because I was unable to concentrate and continue to put on a good face. I couldn't focus, and the next semester, I had been unable to recover very well. By January, I was a wreck, I cannot stress that enough. Unable to cope with the fact that I had lost amazing friends, I refused to be social, and even went into a phase of self-loathing.Who am I kidding, the phase never ended, but it intensified. I thought I was no good to anyone, if anything, I would ruin their day and make them regret knowing of my existence. To a degree, I still feel that.
Here came February 20th, 2010, how times passes by. A beautiful thread came about, by pure change I decided to stop by that day, even contemplating not even posting ever again. I was this close to a blog post about never coming back, "Giantbomb doesn't do it for me anymore, nothing does" is what I would have called it. I see the same threads over and over again, my contribution to them would have still met nothing. But, there is was, I wouldn't joke about this sort of thing. A single thread existed that drew me to it. I had to check it out. And god damn it, I did.
"Giantbomb isn't a dating site, I hope you realize that"
Life of a Gay Gamer
It drew me in, to be honest, I was already out. Well as out as a masculine 6'5'' person can be, except to my parents. I wanted to see not the poster, but the responses, as expected they were as shit as I thought they would be. Not all of them mind you, but just a select few were there that acted like smug pricks. To be honest, at the time I paid little attention to the topic creator, I was more focused on paying attention to the thread as it evolved. Or devolved as is the case. Jeff tuned in, which was nice, not just nice to me, but nice to the creator. 5 pages it would take, exactly 5 pages before Mmmslash (The OP) would reply to me. I posted a few times, pretty shitty posts to be honest, but that was my standard, I'm not a good poster and I will never be a good poster. Hardly destiny, I would call it pure dumb luck, which describes me perfectly. I mean seriously, who the fuck wants to talk to a sarcastic asshole, dickhead, whose additions to a thread are awful?!
Mmmslash would, good god what unbelievable luck. Not just once, or twice, but for a next long time. Not just him, but a few other posters. Shinri and Canberra, you guys rock. What happened between me and Mmmslash goes beyond a conversation, I'll spare you the story.
Took your time to get here
I won't lie, after that day, after that night, I loved him. Right away, if he reads this, so be it. I loved him right away, and he became really really important to me. Take into consideration I was depressed, angry at myself, and needed to feel some love. I took what I got, but what a great bit of luck that what I found happened to be the most important person of my life. Even now, he is still important to me, every day I cannot stop thinking about him. Mmmslash, Daniel, I can't stop thinking about you. God damn it, you are the most important person in my life. You saved me from the darkest period of my life, thank you. Maybe one day, a thank you will be much more personal.
Giantbomb to me is special, special like the central station another couple met at. This is my pilgrimage spot, my holy land. Claude is a mentor to me, Shinri, Canberra and AjayRaz are brothers to me, but Mmmslash is someone beyond that. Giantbomb has transcended the gaming website. I love you guys, thanks for existing.
9 Comments