...And it turned out pretty well, I think. I started work on it roughly twenty-four hours ago, and have spent a large portion said past twenty-four hours working on it. I think it's pretty cool, despite the whole "white Helvetica on light blue background" thing not exactly being the most original concept in the world. 
 
Anyways, here it is: http://almostillustrated.com 
 
It works great with Chrome and Internet Explorer 8, and reasonably well with Firefox. Internet Explorer 9 Beta's new rendering engine doesn't seem to like the sub-pages (click "about" and "songs" [but not in too quick succession; it'll bug out on you, I'm still working on that]) for some reason. 
 
It does some cool Javascript stuff, so it won't look very impressive as a still image, but why the hell not: