Saints Row: The Third Review
The crazy crime title that is Saints Row: The Third accomplishes the first priority of which I think games must have to complete first on their “checklist,” a fun time. From parachuting out of airplanes, navigating tanks through the streets, to witty and humorous punch lines and whacking assailants on the side of the head with giant dildos, Saints Row: The Third was perhaps the most fun game I’ve played in a long time!
The game is practically an open world theme park for you to roam around to do whatever you please. And for the first time, Saints Row The Third takes you out of Stilwater, which was the setting for the first two games, and plops you down into the new city of Steelport. There is no warm welcoming ceremony when you arrive however, as there are already three gangs all vying for control of the city.
And none will settle for anything less.
The result is utter chaos as war breaks out between you and the three gangs. And matters only get worse when the government, STAG, arrives to try to restore the peace. Your end goal is to take over Steelport and push the STAG forces back to whence they came!
The game kicks off with a brief intro mission that warms you up with the game’s controls and story. Upon completion brings up the character customization panel, of which customization plays a huge role in the game. From your body to the vehicles you drive and the weapons you fire, almost everything dear to you in the game can be customized and altered.
I loved that when I jumped into online play, no two characters ever looked the same. There are so many options for the player to delve into that it would be almost impossible to look like the next character unless you tried.
The game’s main story can be split into three acts, with two different endings. All in all, there are 49 story and side missions for you to complete to fill your time, all of which help earn you some extra cash and boost your street cred, which is also your experience system to level up so to speak. Every time you level up, you’ll unlock points to spend in the upgrade section on perks such as extra damage from rifles, extra health and the ability to dual wield pistols.
One of my favorite things to do in the game was going around and purchasing all the shops in Steelport. I truly felt like I was running my own little empire by the time I had completed the game. With each store that you buy, the more money you’ll get by the hour deposited into your bank account. And you’ll also get a discount on the goods sold at that store too.
Shops can range from anything such as weapon and clothing stores, to strip clubs and plastic surgeons. If you want to change the way your face looks, you can do so at any time! Or if you suddenly felt the urge to sex change from male to female, or female to male, then just do it! Saints Row The Third practically lets you do anything you want how you want, and opens up and entire new world to house it all.
While the visuals may not be up to par with some of the other games that have come out during its time, like the mouth-watering visuals of Uncharted 3 such as, Saints Row The Third definitely has its fair share of awe inducing moments like the many neon-lit skyscrapers towering above you in downtown Steelport. Regretfully, the world of Saints Row The Third isn’t as vibrant and full of life as you may have thought, or wanted it to be.
Yes, while it may be large and aesthetically appealing for the most part, the game does little to make the player feel like they’re actually there. The lifeless interaction from the NPCs walking about the streets make the game feel all the more lifeless and traffic popping into view ahead of you gets very annoying, very fast. Especially when the terrible pop in issue happens so close to you that you wreck your vehicle as a result and gain notoriety.
If you have notoriety, passing by cops may be a mistake. If they recognize your face, they’ll immediately draw their weapons and begin to fire at you, or chase you down in hot pursuit if you so happen to be in a vehicle. The more notoriety you have will decide how much backup comes to the aid of the cop that had spotted you. Soon you could have a good 10-20 cops at your back… And a SWAT team!
Another nifty feature the game has is its licensed soundtrack, which can be heard on radios in vehicles throughout the game, or could be simply playing the background during a mission. While in a car, the radio will blast out many familiar tunes, many of which are well-recognized songs ranging from hip-hop to classical across many different stations, of which you can choose from. You can even build and customize your own playlist if you’d like.
Closing Comments
All of the things that the average modern human enjoys, sex, violence and profane language is everything that Saints Row: The Third brings to the table. The game is a sheer blast from beginning to end, even if the conclusion isn’t as satisfying of one as you might have hoped. This open world theme park gives players the ticket to finally do everything they’ve dreamed of doing, and with a get out jail free card!
And with the addition of drop in drop out coop, all if the glorious profanity can be shared with a friend as you wreck mayhem with a rocket launcher on the residents below from a helicopter. Or maybe my mind is too twisted… Point in case, Saints Row: The Third is fun, not realistic, not a visual masterpiece or a triple A grade quality story, fun.
