J. K. Simmons Sells You Portals

@bartok said:

I hear if you lose JK Simmons will tattoo a swastika on your ass and repeatedly sodomize you.

But you can fight back by tossing a chair into a piece of glass and damage his eye. He will reciprocate by deceiving Chris Meloni do break all of your bones and have his son kill your son. Of course, you can come back by killing both of his sons and killing him in a performance of MacBeth.

Portal 2, in stores now.

His voice makes me want to buy things...

I'm so excited JK Simmons is in Portal 2! it is gunna be great!

GIVE ME THIS GAME ALREADY

XD

I like these little 30-1 Min second clips that don't give away any story or actual rooms of the game. I can maintain some form of media blackout but not really but sort of kind of you know. 
 
Also JK Simmons you so crazay.

I hear if you lose JK Simmons will tattoo a swastika on your ass and repeatedly sodomize you.

I am now mistrustful of panels now.

I think they are genius for having him do voice-overs for the game. He doesnt even have to TRY to be funny. Just by talking he can come off hilarious.

I want a crusher.

Easiest thing in the world.

They don't have to try, they just say "Portal 2" and I'm like "Here's my $60".

Between Cave Johnson, GLaDOS and the Merchant personality sphere, there are going to be a heck of a lot of laughs going around. 
 
My body isn't just ready. 
IT WAS MADE FOR THIS.

" My body is ready. "

Humans suck

Now you're thinking with portals...

Panels.... The Planks of Tomorrow!

Now go get me photos of Spiderman!

Hmmm.  That re-ignited my interest in Portal 2.

"
                I really dislike the British personality sphere they've been showing - I just don't find him amusing. Simmons however has me ready to go.
            "

Also, JK Simmons is still awesome  "

Funny. Loved it.

Sooo good.
 
...and yeah, JK's voice is solid gold.

" Hahaha, I love Valves trailers. The Portal ones especially have a cool atyle to them "

I starting to look forward to this. Preversely going to pick up the PS3 version to get the free PC version.

aww poor robots, I'm wondering are those animations made in the source engine?

i want this so bd right now :)

This has to be my favorite piece of Portal marketing yet.

J.K. Simmons in a video game is always an instant sell for me even with the spider-man games.  I really hope he takes the role of JJJ in the Spider-man reboot!!

Hahaha, I love Valves trailers. The Portal ones especially have a cool atyle to them

HAAAAA!!! thats fuking ace!!!

I'm sold, give me 15,000.

" JK Simmons + Valve = Awesomesauce  It's true. Look it up. "

just take my money already!

Comedy gold.

Yeah well Pax is ahead with you they also had panels.

Someone i the comments said they hope J.K. Simmons becomes the Kevin Butler of Valve and honestly...I have to agree. 
 
He is so freakin' fantastic (I don't think I have ever NOT loved him in something) and I would love if his "Cave Johnson" character just became this overarching character in all the Valve games (because don't all the games share the same universe in weird obscure ways? Even TF2?)

If J.K. Simmons told me that I had ball cancer, I'm pretty sure that I would somehow end up being excited about it.

" Not really a big fan of portal, not that it is a bad game i just never understood the hype around it. "

JK Simmons + Valve = Awesomesauce
 
It's true. Look it up.

LOL, I loved him as President Ackerman in red alert 3. "Vote for me if you wanna live!"

pretty good!

The end was genius. "Thaaat is not a panel. That's a crusher...we sell them too"  His voice is fantastic and very well suited for my image of the CEO of a mega-corporation.

JK Simmons could sell me anything.

I feel bad for other games coming out this year :(

Not really a big fan of portal, not that it is a bad game i just never understood the hype around it.

Portal 2 is 55 bucks on Amazon, with a 20 dollar gift card and a PC version for free if you buy it on PS3. 
 
I'm just trying to figure out if  there will be a bum rush of PS3 copies on ebay gutted for the PC copy. 

Yay!