271 CommentsRefresh
Avatar image for beachthunder
Posted by BeachThunder

A minute until a random spoiler, that has to be a record, right?

Avatar image for hammondoftexas
Edited by HammondofTexas

No... no... NO! NOT THE KEYS!

Avatar image for quaglartheiv
Posted by QuaglarTheIV

Spookin' with Drew & Dan.

Avatar image for abendlaender
Posted by Abendlaender

Drew and Dan are a great team to play bad games

Avatar image for hollitz
Posted by hollitz

The ending of Blair Witch is scary and Blade Runner is good.

Dan tried to eat egg shells.

Avatar image for roger_klotz
Edited by Roger_Klotz

Don't be an idiot, always cover your dork.

Avatar image for vibratingdonkey
Edited by VibratingDonkey

Why aren't these keys in the shape of anything? Don't they know anything about unlocking? Seriously, Resident Evil solved this problem almost 20 years ago.

The game seems bad about its UI cues and logic in general. Locks you can't interact with are red, makes sense. But then the keys you can interact with are also red. And when you go back to the lock you now can interact with, it's still red.

With the unlocking of doors being a main gameplay mechanic of this game, it just seems bizarre that they did not address these things.

Can't pick up batteries before you've picked up a flash light, because of reasons.

Avatar image for ghost_cat
Posted by Ghost_Cat

Okay, I thought I loved Dan, but selling your copy of Blade Runner and unsure if you ever watched hurts me so hard.

Avatar image for quipido
Posted by Quipido

What is up with the brightness, guys? Maybe you should calibrate the monitor you are playing on instead of jacking the settings up in every game? This way all the viewers with actually calibrated TVs end up seeing washed up videos!

Avatar image for amyggen
Posted by AMyggen

@hollitz: Blair Witch was never scary! :)


Avatar image for hustlerlt
Posted by hustlerlt

Key Simulator 2014

Avatar image for xite
Posted by xite

God damn it, Dan.

Avatar image for beachthunder
Edited by BeachThunder

Don W. Stairs.

Avatar image for machofantastico
Posted by MachoFantastico

God dammit Dan, you need to fix that... you need to see Blade Runner.

Avatar image for mattclassic
Posted by MattClassic

Get Dan and Drew to play all bad horror games tia

Avatar image for mooseymcman
Posted by MooseyMcMan

Guys, before you go saying that Dan needs to see Blade Runner, keep in mind, this is Dan. Does Blade Runner seem like something he'd like? I mean, I love Blade Runner, but even I admit, that movie is pretty boring if you're not into it. For all I know, maybe he would really like it, but just keep in mind that like many people, Dan has his own particular (and sometimes strange) opinions and tastes. And that saying it in the comments isn't going to magically make it happen.

Avatar image for bbalpert
Posted by BBAlpert

A minute until a random spoiler, that has to be a record, right?

So I'll know whether or not to skip over that part, what gets spoiled?

Avatar image for soviet666
Posted by Soviet666

Guys, before you go saying that Dan needs to see Blade Runner, keep in mind, this is Dan. Does Blade Runner seem like something he'd like?

There's no wresting in it, so of course he won't be interested.

Avatar image for humanity
Posted by Humanity

This game is like Silent Hill in first person

Online
Avatar image for pudge
Posted by Pudge
Avatar image for ironrinn
Posted by IronRinn

@xite said:

God damn it, Dan.

The newly-minted Giant Bomb equivalent to Walter Sobchak's "Shut the fuck up, Donny."

Avatar image for mooseymcman
Posted by MooseyMcMan

@soviet666: Actually, there is some stuff that's kinda wrestling-ish in the fight between Deckard and Pris. I mean, it's not literally wrestling, but it's close-ish.

Avatar image for siroptimusprime
Edited by SirOptimusPrime

@humanity said:

This game is like Silent Hill in first person

But you can actually open these doors. Silent Hill is eternally full of locked doors.

Avatar image for exfate
Posted by exfate

This spooky mansion game needs more master of unlocking.

Avatar image for joey_ravn
Posted by JoeyRavn

TRIGGER WARNING

Keys.

Avatar image for mikke
Posted by Mikke

Getting some intense nausea from this game for some reason. Another HL2 similarity I guess.

Avatar image for quipido
Posted by Quipido

@ironrinn said:

@xite said:

God damn it, Dan.

The newly-minted Giant Bomb equivalent to Walter Sobchak's "Shut the fuck up, Donny."

Ha!

Avatar image for blupotato
Posted by BluPotato

The true terror of this game is that it's just a metaphor for life. The constant thrill of finding out what is behind closed and locked doors ruined by the fact that its just a boring note that makes you fall asleep. You keep trying to find something interesting but there is nothing, a true existentialist thriller for the ages.

Avatar image for impartialgecko
Posted by impartialgecko

Drew and Dan are a great team to play bad games

Correction: The BEST team to play bad games.

Avatar image for emuprime
Posted by EmuPrime

"I pretty much don't know anything that wasn't in a Simpsons episode." Yes! Someone else like me!

Avatar image for dazzhardy
Posted by DazzHardy

Those keys did not open doors, I feel that I've been lied to by Gauntlet for all these years!

Avatar image for abendlaender
Edited by Abendlaender
@bbalpert said:

@beachthunder said:

A minute until a random spoiler, that has to be a record, right?

So I'll know whether or not to skip over that part, what gets spoiled?

Talking about a 32 year old movie can't seriously be considered a spoiler....

Avatar image for shirokumakun
Posted by shirokumakun

I don't think this game is very good...

Avatar image for vhold
Posted by vhold

Dan needs to quick look every Simpsons game ever created.

Avatar image for dusker
Posted by dusker

I recently watched Blade Runner with my girlfriend, who has never seen it. She was so fucking bored and confused the entire time. And when she asked me to explain why the film was interesting, all I could tell her is that it's about the "atmosphere", which sounded like a shitty cop out. So, as a result, I ended up being super fucking bored and we didn't even finish it.

This is all to say that I don't blame Dan for thinking the movie is boring.

At least there aren't any keys in Blade Runner.

Avatar image for brianp
Posted by BrianP

Loving the Dan and Drew team. When that ghost or whatever dropped another key, I fucking lost it.

Avatar image for mr_creeper
Edited by Mr_Creeper
Avatar image for andrewb
Posted by AndrewB

I've learned to immitute Dan exarctly.

Avatar image for spacecouncil
Edited by SpaceCouncil

aren't you guys using a 680? Y U NO turn it to high and turn on AA? journalistic standard?

EDIT : my bad, gut reaction. not far enough in.

Avatar image for hmacyfan4eva
Posted by HMacyFan4eva

I love how Dan and Drew always just keep chugging along and try to get the most out of the game, no matter how truly terrible and boring it is

Avatar image for the_atomic_dumpling
Posted by atomic_dumpling
@dusker said:

I recently watched Blade Runner with my girlfriend, who has never seen it. She was so fucking bored and confused the entire time. And when she asked me to explain why the film was interesting, all I could tell her is that it's about the "atmosphere", which sounded like a shitty cop out. So, as a result, I ended up being super fucking bored and we didn't even finish it.

This is all to say that I don't blame Dan for thinking the movie is boring.

At least there aren't any keys in Blade Runner.

I had the exact same experience with my GF a few months ago. I tried to argue "Film Noir" and "Vangelis", but it was rather hopeless.

Avatar image for slindz
Posted by slindz

I thought the painting bit was cool but holy fuck the find key/door/paper/sleep repeat cycle is atrocious.

Avatar image for xite
Posted by xite

I think we have a new top contender for Worst Game of the Year.

Avatar image for brianp
Posted by BrianP

QL is awesome but why keep the settings on medium / medium and low?

:(

Come on folks, we live in 2014 here!!!!!

Don't they change everything to high like 4 minutes in?

Avatar image for vibratingdonkey
Posted by VibratingDonkey

Oh maaaan.... This game. Why would you do this?

If the developer intentionally designed the intro to be this frustrating patience-trying repetitive insanity with the intent of having the player character snap at the same time as the player, and then have the game shift into something completely different, that'd be a reason, I guess. But that's not happening, is it?

Avatar image for kantrip
Posted by kantrip

Oh Dan. We learn so much about you during these segments.

Seriously though, watch Bladerunner (Directors Cut). Really good movie.

Avatar image for wienerless_steve
Posted by Wienerless_Steve

Shit's Locked: The Game

Avatar image for tjmasterk
Posted by TJMasterK

Wow. Game just looks tedious and a waste of time honestly. That flashlight. Jesus, its so bad. They try to make an immersive horror game and fail miserably.