Bad Street Brawler

I've been looking for this one. Before Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat, there was Bad Street Brawler (also known as Bop 'N Rumble on the Commodore 64 and Street Hassle on the Amiga), a side-scrolling beat 'em up developed by Beam Software and released for various platforms in late 1987. Interestingly, the NES version is one of only two games designed specifically for use with the Power Glove. The graphics are fugly and the character designs are unappealing: in the NES version the main character looks like a homosexual Duke Nukem whilst on the Amiga and the ZX Spectrum he's a short muscular man wearing only sunglasses and a speedo. On the Amiga, the graphics are nothing short of being absolutely terrible, including character sprites ripped straight from the ZX Spectrum version and cut-scenes that look like they were drawn on Microsoft Paint. The enemy roster is dumb: in the Commodore 64 and Amiga versions you fight old age pensioners (who were changed to street punks and circus strong-men in the NES version due to censorship issues). Other than that, almost zero enemy variety. Even less plot than the most generic beat 'em ups out there. Every level looks almost exactly the same. Before each level you get to practice your special moves on a punching bag, but the game never tells you how to actually pull them off and instead displays stupid proverbs such as "Never trouble trouble til trouble troubles you". Your special attacks are different in each level and look ridiculous in action, such as a strangling move that looks like you're molesting the enemy to death. Every level also has to be completed in a time limit, when you run out of time your health drains away. After every few levels we see stupid and badly-drawn Cutscenes ("I'd like a hamburger instead"). Also, everything's on one flat plane instead of being able to move up/down. Only two very annoying songs play throughout the whole game. On the Amiga, it has plagiarized music (including "No Limit" by 2 Unlimited). Attempts at shock value come off as crude and childish (curse words scribbled on level scenery, you fight tall black basketballers in the two last levels), much like Franko: The Crazy Revenge, which makes sense because both Franko and this game were made by the same company, Mirage Interactive. There's a half-assed environmental message (enemies often drop trash when defeated, which the main character tosses into a dumpster at the end of each level for extra points). A note to fans of Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat: DO NOT PLAY THIS GAME. You will want to nuke your console if you do.