By Chummy8 30 Comments
There was an email on this week's bombcast about Fraternities and the duders said some negative things. In response, I would like to share my personal story about joining (founding) a chapter of Kappa Sigma at my College.
First let me say this: I know bad shit happens with fraternities. Each school and each chapter is different. MY story is simply that, my story. But I want you all to know that not all Frat guys are "bros" and we don't all go raping girls every chance we get. Those types of guys shame us all.
In highschool, I was a nerd. I played Magic: The Gathering, was VP of the Computer Club (in 1998 not even when liking computers was cool), and played way too much video games in and out of school. While I was decent looking (based on comments on my senior yearbook picture made by my wife's friends not trying to brag), I was very awkward in social settings and didn't even have a girlfriend before graduation. I went on a few dates that didn't really go anywhere serious. I only had a small circle of 3 friends that I did everything with. Basically, I was invisible.
I went to the local State College and immediately fell back into my rut. My 3 friends went to schools out of state and I commuted back and forth to school and work every day. I knew cool shit and parties were going on all around me, but being socially awkward I couldn't just go to people in class and ask to go to their dorm/apartment for a party. Plus, I thought that was very creepy. I wanted to join a fraternity for the immediate benefits, go to parties, make new friends, and meet girls. What I got, as the story goes, is much more.
I looked at the other chapters and found the guys there to be boring or "bros" basically guys that didn't want me or were not a good fit for me. In passing, I found out about a group of guys who were trying to found their own chapter. Guys just like me who for some reason or another looked at the other organizations and wanted something better. It took some hard work, community service, and fund raisers, but we finally all got initiated together. The best times were the road trips, the hanging out in dorms playing Halo, and the brotherhood events.
The dudes I founded with and the brothers that came after were and still are some of my closest friends. These guys accepted me for who I was regardless of how awkward I was. Having that confidence of being accepted, gave me the courage to meet girls. I got kind of good at it actually.
I met my wife at a mixer since she was in a Sorority as well. We dated my last 2 years in college and now I have 2 kids with her. Our friends are still many of the same people we went to school with and some new brothers and sisters that came after us. After college, our life became a series of weddings, baby showers, baptisms, and now kids birthdays. We still hang out with the same people, we just don't get as crazy as we used to (since we're old now). Since I was a townie back then and haven't moved far from the college since, I have a steady stream of younger brothers in the chapter I can call on to help me move furniture or whatnot. I never got the business benefits that come with pledging, but that's not why I did it in the first place. I did it for the brotherhood that started off as artificial but ended being legit.
Pledging a fraternity is not for everyone. I understand that. I just wanted to say that it's also not all bad either. Based on who I was before and all that came after, I can honestly say that pledging Kappa Sigma was the best decision I have ever made.
AEKDB for those who know.