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Ubisoft's E3 2010 Press Conference Live Blog

Saddle up for this one.

In a few moments, Ubisoft will begin its E3 2010 press conference. What will we hear about? Chances are Assassin's Creed Brotherhood will be a big focus. There's also a chance we'll catch a glimpse of the next Ghost Recon and maybe, just maybe, we'll see a bit more of Beyond Good and Evil 2. Call me a dreamer. 
 
Look below for a breakdown of what's being said or to feel my pain if James Cameron walks onto the stage again. 
 
== TEASER == All updates will be made in ascending order.     
 
[6:29 PM] Not one person grabbed their crouch during that dance routine. Also, Ubisoft's press conference is over, apparently. 
   
[6:28 PM] Man, those are some tight pants Ms. Blonde Lady. 

[6:27] Michael Jackson dance game announced 20 years too late. 

[6:25 PM] Man, even Ubisoft's CEO was like, "yo, man, I'm boring. I'm getting out of here."  

[6:24 PM] Looks like Ubisoft is about ready to announce some sort of social creation platform. Think Uplay, except with a Track Mania focus.   

[6:22 PM] Rayman Origins. It looks great, man. 

[6:19 PM] Hey, a Rayman title. Awesome! (He still doesn't have arms.)

[6:17 PM] Alright. I was early. (My bones do not lie.) They're currently showing a downloadable title. I have no idea what genre it's in or what it even is. But it's called Project Dust and features tribal dudes chilling on a beach with a lot of holes in it.          

[6:16 PM] OK. That's over. Here's the Beyond Good and Evil announcement. I can FEEL it. 

[6:13 PM] Well over a 100 licensed cars. Apparently there will be damage, too. Showing off a feature named "Shift" now. Lead character is in a coma? And he can shift to anywhere in the world? I'm lost. 

[6:12 PM] Oh, man, I sorta forgot to pay attention there. Apparently this is a reboot of the series. It's "going back to the series' roots."  

[6:10 PM] Yeah. It's definitely based on the set of Full House, as expected. 

[6:10 PM] I think the new Driver game is about to be revealed. 

[6:09 PM] Entire campaign to be playable with 4-players. 

[6:06 PM] We're seeing some cooperative elements. Dudes taking turns killing bad dudes. Now we're seeing some cover-based shooting. I really wish Ghost Recon would go back to first-person. 

[6:04 PM] #Ubisoft is trending for all the wrong reasons. Also, dude is still sneaking around in active camo, shooting dudes in the back. 

[6:01 PM] Live demo of the game now. The active camo looks pretty ridiculous. It might have unlimited juice.  

[5:59 PM] Rabbids game a Wii exclusive. Hey, a new Ghost Recon Future War trailer. The Ghosts now have exoskeletons, stealth gear, and...rocket launchers like the ones on War Machine.
 
[5:56 PM] New Raving Rabbids game being shown. Time travelling Rabbids. I wonder what Valve's Portal 2 surprise is? Do you think it'll have some cool tie-in?     

[5:55 PM] It won't be at a press conference, but I'd love to see a trailer for Darksiders 2. Just saying. 

[5:53 PM] If you guys have a bunch of media-types on your Twitter lists, go ahead and check it. It's funny. 

[5:52 PM] So, yeah, tomorrow Nintendo will have a press conference. Do you think they'll announce a Zelda?  

[5:49 PM] Your Shape: Fitness Trainer is being shown again. I wonder if it'll be the same presentation at Microsoft's press conference. I think it is.   
 
[5:48 PM] Well, that's over. Two games about to be announced for Kinect: a skiing game and a soccer game.

[5:45 PM] Ubisoft designers are chiming in about going beyond traditional controller interaction.  

[5:45 PM] Waiting for this to end. It's ending soon, right?   

[5:43 PM] I love all this voodoo talk about stress and whatnot. Anyway, you move this little worm through a rainbow tunnel by breathing.  

[5:42 PM] It's a heartbeat sensor. You play a game with it. Oh, Ubisoft.  

[5:40 PM] This game called, uh, Innergy is being shown. It's being said that it reduces stress.  

[5:39 PM] Battle Tag bundle comes with two guns and something. Requires PC connectivity. I think.   

[5:37 PM] Battle Tag comes with little blogs that act as beacons or "checkpoints." You can make little games around these. Also, this ... SOMEONE GET JAMES CAMERON OUT ON THE STAGE. Tell me about Avatar's storyline  for forty minutes straight. Please. 

[5:36 PM] This is unbelievable. The toy gun has reloadable, fake ammo. You run around and shoot each other in the eye of a sensor hooked into a harness. 

[5:35 PM] Wait, this isn't a joke. It's a game called Battle Tag. It's Laser Tag. Except with the word "battle" in front of it.  

[5:34 PM] Mr. Announcer Man has been interrupted by two people shooting fake guns at each other.  

[5:33 PM] Shaun White will be in 3D. Awesome.  

[5:31 PM] Lovin' Shaun White's hair.  

[5:31 PM] You'll be able to color a skate park that's unique to you. 
 
[5:29 PM] A live demonstration is going on. They're showing off the game's pseudo-open world and its Tony Hawk-style mechanics.   

[5:26 PM] They keep shifting positions. Anyway, Shaun White Snowboarding is being shown. Players will be able to transform the environment in the game as they skate. You'll literally be building "your own twisted reality" and "bring life and color" back to the world. 

[5:25 PM] Man. The Ubisoft set has wooden white cubes for the people on the stage to sit on. Everyone is uncomfortable. They look uncomfortable.  

 [5:24 PM] Shaun White is out on the stage. He's talking about his skateboarding career.   
   
[5:20 PM] "A fresh and innovative experience" is coming. He suggested Leaderboard competition. Not really understand the co-op business.  

[5:19 PM] "A Brotherhood will be necessary to strike at the heart of the enemy in Rome," says the Ubisoft dude.
 
[5:18 PM] Now a short melee section. Oh wait, Ezio just through an axe at a dude. Very cool.   

[5:16 PM] A cannon gameplay sequence is being shown. It's a lot like Red Dead Redemption's Gatling Gun or cannon; third-person, point and shoot with the reticule. Except instead of dudes, you're blowing up towers. "Multiple new gadgets and machinery" are being promised. 

[5:14 PM] The scene leads to a mission. Ezio's bedroom exploits are interrupted by a rock. He's now being asked to defend the walls of a city. Ezio just jumped on a horse--horse-fighting confirmed!
     
[5:12 PM]  The trailer ends. Vincent Po-werefadfadsfa or something is on stage. He's giving some context to the game. Ezio is now a leader and he's also "deadlier than ever." Apparently, he's also still a lady's man. A scrap of gameplay footage of Ezio and a woman in bed is being shown. I wonder if Playboy will be a sponsor of this game.

[5:10 PM] Now a "for real" trailer. It's the one we posted earlier that shows Ezio and his co-assassin's doing their thing in a crowd. 

[5:09 PM]  An Assassin's Creed Brotherhood trailer is GO. Right now it's like a cheap iMovie--just scrolling pictures, epic music, and sound effects. Wait, there's an Ezio. 

[5:08 PM] Looks like Kinect and Move will be a big deal, if Mr. Announcer-Man is teasing correctly.  

[5:06 PM] That was Child of Eden by Mizuguchi.
 
[5:01 PM]  I'm not really sure what's going on here. A dude is on stage, using gesture controls for a game that looks like a 3D update of Geometry Wars. There's trance music, lots of neon, and a ridiculous amount of on-screen havoc as objects are blown up.

344 Comments

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TheLawnWrangler

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Edited By TheLawnWrangler

Wow! that sounds... awesome! (?) 
 
poor joel.

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Deadend

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Edited By Deadend

heh even the host seems to be thinking "what the hell is this shit."

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eljay

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Edited By eljay

This is actually getting...worse?!

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Wacomole

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...and now an Infomercial

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count_zero

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Edited By count_zero
@Manhattan_Project: I love that before Nintendo has announced software for the Vitality Sensor, Ubisoft has not only announced their own version, but bundled software to go with it.
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masterken

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Edited By masterken

well this conference just went down the shitter

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JBird

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Edited By JBird

A clever reporter on the gamespot feed just said words to the effect of "yes, i am stressed, and what will  help is being judged on how well I relax". That was actually funny so I thought i'd share it.
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CreativeColossi

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Edited By CreativeColossi

Now for the "zomg no controllers it'z a revolutyun" video.

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NegativeCreep

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Edited By NegativeCreep

Psychobabble.

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The_Patriarch

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Edited By The_Patriarch

A dude with fuchsia red hair is telling Joel McHale about stress and some vitality sensor game that can make his batteries reload. And now french people are speaking english.
 
What?

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Extreme_Popcorn

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Wow! The most french person ever!

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Dujun

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Edited By Dujun

This got really weird really quick...

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bcjohnnie

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Edited By bcjohnnie

This press conference is kind of a train wreck... I'm fairly sure that none of these people had any idea what was going to happen until Ubisoft threw them up there.  I think McHale is a funny guy, but the only reason he could be sooo fucking awkward and nervous is that they didn't bother rehearsing any of this.  That laser tag bullshit struck me the same way.
 
That said, I'm surprised that I liked the gameplay in the Shaun White game.  Other than that and the new AC, this is all kind of meh so far.

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TonyBlue87

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Edited By TonyBlue87

Ok great, you don't want traditional controllers.  Wonderful.  Now provide some substance to go with this downpour of bullshit.

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Hitchenson

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Edited By Hitchenson

They have somehow done worse than Microsoft, I'm, uh, this is just horrible to watch.

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Wacomole

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Edited By Wacomole

I guess they're just putting this crap stuff in to make the good stuff at the end look EXTRA special...  right?  ...right!?

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NakAttack

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Edited By NakAttack
@Dujun said:
" This got really weird really quick... "
my sentiments exactly
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MeatXbeatsXman

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Edited By MeatXbeatsXman

Man, that battle Tag presentation was awkward as hell.

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neoepoch

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Edited By neoepoch

It is E3 2009 all over again. Except with less James Cameron...thank God.

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mikecardii

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Edited By mikecardii

Ubisoft's games are waaaay too hit or miss

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TheLawnWrangler

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Edited By TheLawnWrangler
@bcjohnnie said:
" This press conference is kind of a train wreck... I'm fairly sure that none of these people had any idea what was going to happen until Ubisoft threw them up there.  I think McHale is a funny guy, but the only reason he could be sooo fucking awkward and nervous is that they didn't bother rehearsing any of this.  That laser tag bullshit struck me the same way.  That said, I'm surprised that I liked the gameplay in the Shaun White game.  Other than that and the new AC, this is all kind of meh so far. "
surprisingly, the games you play with a controller were the best ones to you and me and probably a majority of every living person watching this. Ubisoft should note this. 
 
but yeah, i agree, the shaun white game looks kinda cool
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SuperfluousMoniker

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Oh dammit, Kinect games. It just keeps getting worse!

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CreativeColossi

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Edited By CreativeColossi

EUROTRASH MODEL TIMEEEE.

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manhattan_project

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Oh Ubisoft, how I love you for this.

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crusader8463

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This feels like I'm watching some Mad TV joke about how bad press conferences are. Wasn't Ubi the ones that had that drunk/drugged out Z list comedian host last year? If so these guys need to stop doing these.

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NegativeCreep

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Edited By NegativeCreep

KILL ME

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TonyBlue87

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Edited By TonyBlue87

Ah, well, that will sell games, won't it?  Make your target audience look like a bunch of mentally retarded, socially repressed morons.

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light_grenade

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Edited By light_grenade

AC:brotherhood, beyond good and evil 2 sounds good to me :D

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conformunist

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Edited By conformunist

Christ... this is bad.  Real bad...
 
Edit:  Did that chick say "fitness genre?"  It's a genre now?  The world is over.  I quit.

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NickLott

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Edited By NickLott

This is completely surreal. I got to lie down.

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Wacomole

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I keep being reminded of one of those weird inter-song videos at the Eurovision Song Contest..
 
I half expect the Latvian entrant to start up.

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CreativeColossi

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Yoobuhsoft guy is back!

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crusader8463

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Edited By crusader8463

YES! They brought back the hot black stripper lady from the MS event. This thing just got watchable again!

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TonyBlue87

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Oh God help us!  THIS THING AGAIN?!?!

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manhattan_project

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Rehashed presentation down to the jacket and dialogue. WTF.

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TheLawnWrangler

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Edited By TheLawnWrangler

the feeling is incredible 
 
thank you joel for the fire joke and the tit joke

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LosDub

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Edited By LosDub

deja vu from microsoft conference
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Extreme_Popcorn

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Edited By Extreme_Popcorn

This is exactly the same as the Microsoft bit about this

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sparky_buzzsaw

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Edited By sparky_buzzsaw

No more fucking peripheral games, publishers!  Just get it through your goddamn heads!
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The_Patriarch

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Calling it: This is the most awkward press conference in E3 history.
 
She feels the magic in her environment. I feel sick.

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mjk1

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Edited By mjk1

not this again...

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NegativeCreep

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HOLY SHIT SHE'S IN THE ANIMUS!

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CreativeColossi

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Joel makes it semi-bearable.

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shiro11

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This has got to be one of the worst E3 press conferences I have ever seen.

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Extreme_Popcorn

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Edited By Extreme_Popcorn

She's shrunk 2" since the Microsoft press thingy...

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strangeling

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Edited By strangeling

Looks like the view from the couch during Motionsports is going to be a lot of ass in the face.  That can be both good and bad, probably mostly bad.

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NickLott

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Joel McHale is trying to make this tolerable, I respect him for trying.

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iamjohn

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ZZZZZZ

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CreativeColossi

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@NegativeCreep: I'd be up in that animus IF YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
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and333

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Edited By and333

animorpheous blob the game! you too can be a animorpheous blob!!!