Girlfriend Issues... And a psychic. Just missing the donkey.

Well this is a bit weird seeing as I volunteer at a relationship helpline, but I thought I'd ask you guys what you think of this situation with my girlfriend, which I have to say is a bit, well, "left-field" to say the least...  
 
Well she invites me over today, makes out with me and then breaks up with me, which is strange enough. She seems a bit hesitant to answer my questions about why. I presume there's another guy, but she eventually tells me why - Her friend, who is a psychic in training (they have training??!), predicted the other week that I'd bludgeon her to death in my home, in a grey room with no windows. So she's been sitting on this the whole time thinking of how to break up with me. I'm like WTF - I don't even have a grey room and all the ones in my house have windows. And it's not like I've hated her. Well up until now...
 
It honestly sounds like the start to a bad joke, but honestly, she's gonna trust a psychic after nearly a year with me having fun times, saying I'm the best boyfriend ever? Just gonna throw the nights I spent looking after her sick ass while she had food poisoning? The gifts I bought? I mean I guess I did know she believed in unicorns, but In didn't think little pixies would stop us from being together. After all I've done for her. At least it's good to vent. What do you guys think? Please do laugh at my misfortune - I wanna try to see the funny side because I'm really not getting it at all. 
 
Spawn Man. : ( 
  
 

EDIT: Well I went over to see my girlfriend today, hoping she'd calmed down and come to her senses. Lord knows she wasn't going to come over to my place incase I HAD in fact painted a grey room overnight. So, I pressed the buzzer to her apartment, and when she answered she told me to go away in a psychopathic-like voice. Apparently she hadn't calmed down. I kept buzzing because I needed to talk, and then something hit me on my shoulder. It was one of my f*cking shoes! She was throwing all of my stuff out of the window. My favourite shirt was slowly floating into the middle of the street. Lucky no one was driving through so I was able to save it. Man, so lucky all my good stuff like the xbox and computer and personal stuff was at my place, and it was just clothes she was firing down at me! 
 
Well I told her in the manliest voice I could to stop what she was doing, but I was pretty upset, because now I'd been dumped for no f**king reason and she was adding insult to injury by tossing my stuff out a window. She told me to piss off. I started to gather my stuff and I was so pissed by then that I started yelling up at her that she was psycho, and added in the story about her believing a stupid psychic, in the hopes her whole apartment block would hear. She had gone inside so I was about to go when this guy comes out of the lobby doors and comes up in my face. 
 
"You've done enough to her friend" he says in one of those annoyingly calm voices. This guy was f*&king dressed like a pirate (or some other kid of fantastic entity), I kid you not! You cannot make this shit up! I was starting to get really pissed now, because I'd had enough of third parties being entered into our relationship. Thinking he was just a friend, I asked him what he knew about it. It bloody turns out this dick was the psychic! This was the guy! I was furious. And he was so bloody calm, like a manipulative kind of calm. He just kept saying for me to go. 
 
Now I'm not one for violence. And I felt like hitting him and slowly grinding his ugly face into the concrete, but I didn't. I still love her, so if this was what she wanted, I'd leave. As I turned to leave the psychic guy says in a smart way "Bye!" and when I turn around he starts smirking. So I punched him. It was only the second time I'd ever hit someone, the first being when I was 10 in a playground, and it really hurt my hand, but let's just saying he wasn't f**king smiling any more! As soon as his lip started bleeding, I felt immediately guilty and tried to help him, but he ran off inside. Then a moment later my girlfriend says she's called the cops. I decided to stay because I'm not one to run from my responsibilities. Plus I kinda wanted to be a martyr so she could see how miserable she'd made me.
 
Long story short, I spent an hour talking to the cops, giving my statement. It helped my cause that she threw a shoe at me so in the end, the cops let me off with a warning, but told me to leave. They let me get the rest of my stuff, and then I left. 
 
So I was in a pretty bad state and have been crying on the phone to my mum (who doesn't run to mum when something like this happens?) all night. However, my girlfriend turned up about 2 hours ago to talk. Just for you guys, I asked if she wasn't scared that I was going to murder her in my house. She kind of said in a serious voice, "Well it's a risk I have to take". Oh my God riight? The conversation gets better: 
 
Her - "Look I want you to know that I forgive you for what you did, but I cannot be with you any more." 
Me - "What did I f**king do? What have I done to deserve this" In a calm way of course! Or not... 
Her - "Look, you know what you've done". 
 
I'll abbreviate a bit because it took early an hour to get out of her that I had in fact cheated on her. Several times. According to the psychic. Yes ladies and gentlemen, I was being dumped because a psychic told her that I'd kill her and had cheated on her, all without me doing anything. I loved her with everything, I'd never do that to her! I honestly feel like I'm in the Twilight zone with a bunch of f**king crazy people. After trying to convince her that I hadn't, ever, ever EVER cheated on her, I told her to GTFO. Pretty much in those words as well. She is probably the most retarded person I know. You can't reason with someone who believes that shit. 
 
I don't know what's going to happen, but that's pretty much where we left things. i'll keep you posted. Please tell me this is all some kind of cruel joke?

If she's dumb enough to believe the psychic, you're probably better off.

You don't see the funny side of this? 
Man, people trusting psychics are idiots!! 
 
If the psychic predicted that you were gonna "bludgeon"(That word is so dumb) her to death that means you're gonna do it BECAUSE she broke up with you. 
Now go out there and have fun. 
 
Don't care about the "AFTER ALL I DID FOR HER, WHYYY?! WHYYYYYYY!?!?!?" drama, so that I'll leave to someone else who thinks he's a pro 

The story did make me lol this morning, thanks for that. 
 
But meh, if your chick's gonna leave you over some supernatural BS, then chances are somewhere down the line it would have ended anyway, so tell her get her supersticious ass out your goddamn house immediately (make sure you use the immediately, it tells her that its over, that its formal and you don't love her), if by any chance you are at her house atm you could either tell her to gtfo out her house immediately or say something awesome and storm out like a G, if she chases after you, just talk about all the different chicks you have throughout the town and how you were just using her. 
 
Or maybe don't listen to me, i have a habit of trolling people IRL.

Bitch is crazy man!
 
By the sounds of it she'd be more likely to bludgeon you to death in a grey room with no window so you have have dodged a bullet there. Congrats on avoiding your untimely death my friend

No matter how much it sucks, if she believes in psychics (or psycho's) you might be a lot better off.
 
Altho I can understand you won't feel this way for a time :(
Sorry :(

This is a crappy situation, so you have my sympathies - but perhaps in the long run it's a better off situation for both. If she felt that way, even after all the nice things you did for her and how well you treated her, there may have been issues further down the line. I know it's not easy to look at a more positive side right now... but if you try to think of it that way it may help.

You should call her over to your house and tell her that you want to talk.  Then bring her into a freshly painted gray room and start   bludgeoning her to death!

What you do now is meet up with her in a dark room and bludgeon her to death because she broke up with you.

Oh maaaan. 
 
You do NOT want that in your future kid's genepool. She sounds completely retarded, walk away and be happy. You can do a hell of alot better duder.

Stab her in a white room with windows just to prove the psychic wrong.

You don't want a girl that'll believe a story as insane as that. At least you have the best break up story to tell the rest of your life.

1. Her belief in the supernatural outweighs her trust in you
2. Her belief in her friend outweighs her trust in you
   
3. There is some underlying friction between your relationship that prevents her from telling you something that isn't obvious at the moment.
   

Tell her you can't prevent destiny, and that the break up is your motive for killing her. Then go to a strip club for breakfast.

" @SpawnMan: You're missing a golden opportunity here to bludgeon your now ex-gf to death, but then to show up at her "physic" friend's house and go " I guess you didn't see the part where after I kill her I come for you."  This is epic territory lulzworthiness.   "

If shes stupid/crazy enough to believe that I don't think you'd want to be with her, sounds like the kind of person that would kill her husband because the washing machine said the world would end. Or else she's making up this stupid excuse to cover up for something else, have you met this psychic friend before? 

Wow...
 
What a freak.

LMAO, thats pretty hilarious bud. Even more so that you have been with her for a year. I am not laughing at you, I'm laughing at her and how ludicrous this all is. Clearly some kind of screw is loose in her head. Or, you were right at first and there is another guy. And after thinking all day, this is the best she could come up with. Anyways...I don't think you should be sad, since this clearly isn't the woman you thought she was. I would stop speaking to her asap. but first tell her  
 
@VilhelmNielsen said:

" Tell her you can't prevent destiny, and that the break up is your motive for killing her. Then go to a strip club for breakfast. "

Try to tell her how stupid that sounds. Ask if you have a grey wall first of all? Also ask her if you ever been that angry at her and slapped her? Try to cast doubt on her friend, then try to tell her that there is psychic challenges where you get a million dollars if you can prove psychic abiility and no one won yet. Also tell her that her friend is in training and if nothing happens by next week, then her friend is wrong. Or just say you should get back together a week or a month afterwards because that will never happen. Honestly is she really that naive?

I'm going to echo the same general sentiment of the other posters. You're probably better off, bud. 

Good thing this ended now rather than further down the line where you'd be even more invested in this relationship. One year isn't too bad.

Tell her that she believed her friend rather than her supposed "love of the life". It's probably best for you to leave her alone.
 Btw, just to fuck with her, paint your room grey then invite her over as a friend.

" Well this is a bit weird seeing as I volunteer at a relationship helpline, but I thought I'd ask you guys what you think of this situation with my girlfriend, which I have to say is a bit, well, "left-field" to say the least...   Well she invites me over today, makes out with me and then breaks up with me, which is strange enough. She seems a bit hesitant to answer my questions about why. I presume there's another guy, but she eventually tells me why - Her friend, who is a psychic in training (they have training??!), predicted the other week that I'd bludgeon her to death in my home, in a gray room with no windows. So she's been sitting on this the whole time thinking of how to break up with me. I'm like WTF - I don't even have a gray room and all the ones in my house have windows. And it's not like I've hated her. Well up until now... It honestly sounds like the start to a bad joke, but honestly, she's gonna trust a psychic after nearly a year with me having fun times, saying I'm the best boyfriend ever? Just gonna throw the nights I spent looking after her sick ass while she had food poisoning? The gifts I bought? I mean I guess I did know she believed in unicorns, but In didn't think little pixies would stop us from being together. After all I've done for her. At least it's good to vent. What do you guys think? Please do laugh at my misfortune - I wanna try to see the funny side because I'm really not getting it at all.  Spawn Man. : ( "

Sleep with one of her friends. It'll make you feel better.

" @SpawnMan: You're missing a golden opportunity here to bludgeon your now ex-gf to death, but then to show up at her "physic" friend's house and go " I guess you didn't see the part where after I kill her I come for you."  This is epic territory lulzworthiness.   "

" Tell her you can't prevent destiny, and that the break up is your motive for killing her. Then go to a strip club for breakfast. "

" Well this is a bit weird seeing as I volunteer at a relationship helpline, but I thought I'd ask you guys what you think of this situation with my girlfriend, which I have to say is a bit, well, "left-field" to say the least...   Well she invites me over today, makes out with me and then breaks up with me, which is strange enough. She seems a bit hesitant to answer my questions about why. I presume there's another guy, but she eventually tells me why - Her friend, who is a psychic in training (they have training??!), predicted the other week that I'd bludgeon her to death in my home, in a grey room with no windows. So she's been sitting on this the whole time thinking of how to break up with me. I'm like WTF - I don't even have a grey room and all the ones in my house have windows. And it's not like I've hated her. Well up until now... It honestly sounds like the start to a bad joke, but honestly, she's gonna trust a psychic after nearly a year with me having fun times, saying I'm the best boyfriend ever? Just gonna throw the nights I spent looking after her sick ass while she had food poisoning? The gifts I bought? I mean I guess I did know she believed in unicorns, but In didn't think little pixies would stop us from being together. After all I've done for her. At least it's good to vent. What do you guys think? Please do laugh at my misfortune - I wanna try to see the funny side because I'm really not getting it at all.  Spawn Man. : ( "

Girls can just be odd at times dude. for instance 
 
My friend broke up with a girl and didn't really bother speaking to her again because well why would he? and she kept trying to get in touch with him and stuff and he just wasn't interested at all. Next thing you know she is sending him abusive messages telling him to stop being pathetic and how she has moved on. Its just like..yeah..of course you have...the 9000 messages you have sent really show how pathetic HE is when your the one who wont shut up and leave him alone. 
 
Sorry though man but maybe your better off not being with someone who will take what a complete stranger / liar says over her commitments to you.

Now you tell her that YOU went to a psychic and that you were told that your ex breaking up with you just set off a series of seemingly unrelated events including the deaths of several innocent and utterly adorable babies that will end in her being deaf, dumb and blind. She'll be back before the end of the week.  "

" @HS21 said:

Now you tell her that YOU went to a psychic and that you were told that your ex breaking up with you just set off a series of seemingly unrelated events including the deaths of several innocent and utterly adorable babies that will end in her being deaf, dumb and blind. She'll be back before the end of the week.  "

That would just lead to some sort of "psychic prediction war".  
 
@SpawnMan:   Hmm...maybe you should do this. "

" If she's dumb enough to believe the psychic, you're probably better off. "

I am sorry but that is hilarious! No offense but you are clearly better off if she would  break off a year long relationship because of what a psychic in training said. 

if the psychic is a dude, kick his ass. if the psychic is a cute girl, sleep with her. otherwise, enjoy the single life, foo!

I'm laughing

gah what an idiot, you can't reason with these sorts of people. Either this person is incredibly dumb or this is just an excuse

LOL at the crazy shit bitches come up with. This can't be real.

Wow, I feel sorry for you man.  Pretty funny though.