Posted by foggel (2764 posts) -

TL;DR question: Anyone else looking for a job?  
 
I've just returned from China with a degree in marketing management. So after years of essentially drinking and the occasional reading, it hit me: Shit just got real.  
 

 Sorry, I had to. I'm a sucker for anything where the joke is in the use of words.
 I need to find a job. After two weeks of applying I've realized that most companies out there wouldn't recognize a talent if it sat on their face. I mean come on,  sometimes I think my resume makes me look over qualified: 
 
Job objective: Make enough money for a place to live, and some food until I have enough experience to get a better job with better pay. 
 
Skills: None that makes me stand out from the crowd, because I have no marketing experience except the shaping of my online dating profile, but I can't say that was a huge success, I'm still single and my life is miserable. 
 
Experience: Burger flipping. 
 
Education: Kind of relying on the fact that I studied in China. Is that interesting? No? Come on 我会说汉语
  
 Haha oh look, another freshly graduated idiot! We're so much better than him!
 But I'm starting to realize that I need to start somewhere really low. I do not have experience, I do not have any particular skills, but damnit I have potential. The job market in the video game industry is really tight, so there's NO WAY that I can start there. So here's my strategy: 
Hopefully I'll land an entry level job in advertisement selling. From there I'll network with people, and ofcourse gain an understanding on how advertisements are sold and so on. The hard part will be to prove my worth, so I need to practise my presentation skills. After a year or two I'm moving on to something somewhat bigger. I'll probably have to work as a seller a bit more before I can land the kind of job that is fun in marketing. To take part in decisions that affect how to shape the marketing to fit with the strategy of the company and reach the visions and so on. 
 
From there on out IT IS ON. Before you know it I'm managing in a respected marketing firm, and when there's an opening for a marketer in the video games industry then BAM.  
 
---Product manager 
------Senior product manager 
---------Associate General Manager 
------------General Manager 
---------------Director 
------------------C mother E fucking O

(•_•)  

( •_•)>⌐■-■

(⌐■_■)

 Look out Kotick. Enjoy it while it lasts.  
 
And now I am going to call a potential employer. Wish me luck. 
 
Also, I asked this in the beginning but are there others out there applying for jobs? Is it hard to find anything on your profession?
#1 Posted by foggel (2764 posts) -

TL;DR question: Anyone else looking for a job?  
 
I've just returned from China with a degree in marketing management. So after years of essentially drinking and the occasional reading, it hit me: Shit just got real.  
 

 Sorry, I had to. I'm a sucker for anything where the joke is in the use of words.
 I need to find a job. After two weeks of applying I've realized that most companies out there wouldn't recognize a talent if it sat on their face. I mean come on,  sometimes I think my resume makes me look over qualified: 
 
Job objective: Make enough money for a place to live, and some food until I have enough experience to get a better job with better pay. 
 
Skills: None that makes me stand out from the crowd, because I have no marketing experience except the shaping of my online dating profile, but I can't say that was a huge success, I'm still single and my life is miserable. 
 
Experience: Burger flipping. 
 
Education: Kind of relying on the fact that I studied in China. Is that interesting? No? Come on 我会说汉语
  
 Haha oh look, another freshly graduated idiot! We're so much better than him!
 But I'm starting to realize that I need to start somewhere really low. I do not have experience, I do not have any particular skills, but damnit I have potential. The job market in the video game industry is really tight, so there's NO WAY that I can start there. So here's my strategy: 
Hopefully I'll land an entry level job in advertisement selling. From there I'll network with people, and ofcourse gain an understanding on how advertisements are sold and so on. The hard part will be to prove my worth, so I need to practise my presentation skills. After a year or two I'm moving on to something somewhat bigger. I'll probably have to work as a seller a bit more before I can land the kind of job that is fun in marketing. To take part in decisions that affect how to shape the marketing to fit with the strategy of the company and reach the visions and so on. 
 
From there on out IT IS ON. Before you know it I'm managing in a respected marketing firm, and when there's an opening for a marketer in the video games industry then BAM.  
 
---Product manager 
------Senior product manager 
---------Associate General Manager 
------------General Manager 
---------------Director 
------------------C mother E fucking O

(•_•)  

( •_•)>⌐■-■

(⌐■_■)

 Look out Kotick. Enjoy it while it lasts.  
 
And now I am going to call a potential employer. Wish me luck. 
 
Also, I asked this in the beginning but are there others out there applying for jobs? Is it hard to find anything on your profession?
#2 Posted by Video_Game_King (36272 posts) -

So you're going to become CEO by going to China and turning Bobby Kotick into burger feces?.....Whatever works, I guess.

#3 Edited by foggel (2764 posts) -
@Video_Game_King: Never said it was a perfect plan:)
#4 Posted by SexyToad (2722 posts) -

Can you get me a job once you become a CEO?

#5 Posted by Atlantus_Air (187 posts) -

I believe in you Foggel. Make it happen.

#6 Posted by Lunar_Aura (2778 posts) -

I like what you did there with the ASCII face and sunglasses. You're hired!

#7 Posted by foggel (2764 posts) -
@SexyToad: Jobs for everyone! 
@Atlantus_Air: Thanks;)
@Lunar_Aura: Sweet!
#8 Posted by Sploder (917 posts) -

Good luck with that. Give us your name so I can call a hit squa- I mean follow your rise to the top and depose the glorio- I mean dastardly Robert Kotick.

#9 Posted by kristov_romanov (465 posts) -

I'm pretty sure Kotick got the job by murdering a bunch of kittens while masturbating outside a playground.

So, just do more of that than he did.

#10 Posted by Humanity (10123 posts) -

The secret to college is not getting good grades although that helps, and it's certainly not boozing away for 5 years never showing up for class - but rather tons and tons of internships that will eventually get you that "hey do you want to work here after you graduate? You know, like for money?" Proposition.

#11 Posted by Tylea002 (2295 posts) -

You have my Sword.

#12 Posted by AhmadMetallic (18954 posts) -

@kristov_romanov said:

I'm pretty sure Kotick got the job by murdering a bunch of kittens while masturbating outside a playground.

So, just do more of that than he did.

I like that

@Humanity said:

The secret to college is not getting good grades although that helps, and it's certainly not boozing away for 5 years never showing up for class - but rather tons and tons of internships that will eventually get you that "hey do you want to work here after you graduate? You know, like for money?" Proposition.

...but that also makes sense!

--------------------------------------

Anyway, I don't know the first thing about Chinese higher education and Marketing Management, so all I can do is wish you luck. It sounds like you have a good plan there! Just look for jobs everywhere and keep pushing for more work and a bigger resume. Experience is what matters.

Just remember not to suck the devil's dick...

#13 Posted by Tim_the_Corsair (3065 posts) -

So you fulfil the criteria of being an utter cunt?

#14 Posted by Demoskinos (15165 posts) -
@foggel Do me a favor and tell neversoft to make a Tony Hawk game that doesn't suck once your in charge.
#15 Posted by TaliciaDragonsong (8607 posts) -

Hook me up for a writing job when ya can!
 
I currently work part time in a flower store but I hope to find something better soon, been applying all over the place but I think I'd rather study anyway.
We'll see, for now I live and that's more than a while ago.

#16 Posted by gjedwards (102 posts) -

@Tylea002 said:

You have my Sword.

And you have my Bow.

#17 Posted by InternetCrab (1504 posts) -

A member on Giantbomb being the CEO of Activision.

Don't know if that's an honor or not.

#18 Posted by Twisted_Scot (1180 posts) -

To become CEO of Activision you would have to sign a deal with the Devil, or at least give him a good reason to step down as CEO of Activision.

#19 Posted by Veektarius (5025 posts) -

@Twisted_Scot said:

To become CEO of Activision you would have to sign a deal with the Devil, or at least give him a good reason to step down as CEO of Activision.

Best reply so far.

And yeah, if my experience is anything to go on, your best chance as an entry-level employee is to find a company that's on the rocks or too small to take on its competition. Lowball them on the hiring point. You'll be hired for a job you're only hypothetically qualified for, will take on a number of tasks that fall outside your comfort zone, and when they stop giving you raises it's time to go.

#20 Posted by SexyToad (2722 posts) -

@gjedwards said:

@Tylea002 said:

You have my Sword.

And you have my Bow.

and my Axe!

#21 Edited by awesomeusername (4218 posts) -

@foggel: When you get there, I want you to make a military first-person porn game with female soldiers. If you want, throw some guys I guess. I have so many ideas. For the name, Call of Booty will do. Generic, unoriginal and uninspired? Yes. Will it make you billions? FUCK YES.

#22 Posted by iam3green (14390 posts) -

well i was just expecting you to say you would kill him and take over. i guess that work also.

when you do get the job, let everyone here a job.

#23 Posted by _Zombie_ (1462 posts) -

Sell your soul (or your firstborn child) to the devil. Much faster.

#24 Posted by ShaggE (6718 posts) -

You have to eat the heart of the previous CEO to run Activision. The tough part is, Activision CEO hearts pump pure strychnine. If you don't survive the process, your body will be used for COD mocap, and then as a celebratory feast to ring in the next CEO. Of course, since the heart has already been eaten, the new CEO will simply be handpicked from a litter of goatmen conceived by Bobby Kotick and a succubus.

#25 Posted by TooWalrus (13258 posts) -

If all goes as planned, I'll have a degree in Business Management from a moderately-prestigious university after next year. I'm an assistant manager at a pizza place now, and I know that worst-case-scenario could end up being a store manager of another franchise. I actually feel pretty good knowing that if I had to, I could support myself right now and not freeze or starve to death. Yay! I haven't failed at life! 
 
I don't exactly have a 'dream job'. I don't even know what I want to do with my life. I love travel. I actually think it would be pretty awesome to be PR for a game company. I know I'm not exactly artistic enough to design games, but I'm good with people, and I think I could sell a game pretty hard to the public, even if I haven't put my heart and soul into it. If my company would fly me around to various events or whatever, that sounds pretty good. In the meantime though, I'm gonna keep slingin' dough for ten bucks an hour, and 'study hard'.

#26 Posted by foggel (2764 posts) -
@Demoskinos: I'm not releasing a Tony Hawk game unless I like it. 
@TaliciaDragonsong: You're hired. 
@Tim_the_Corsair: I guess that's my weakness:( That's what experience is for though. 
@Veektarius: Yeah, that's what I figured I'd do. Hopefully I'll get something soon. 
@AhmadMetallic: Yeah, I don't know how many applications I've sent out there. But thanks, especially for that video :P 
 
And I see some concerns about evilness. I will be the first paragorn CEO of Activision, so fear not. The forces of evil will be vanquished.
#27 Posted by foggel (2764 posts) -
@awesomeusername: Good idea. I will need to hire some of the guys behind Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball. 
 
@TooWalrus: Yeah me too. I'm not an artist, far from it. That's why I need to find something else that I can contribute with in the video game industry. So as of now I'm thinking marketing/PR.
#28 Posted by Ubersmake (754 posts) -

Realistically, you should be able to find an entry-level position at a marketing company that has video game publishers as clients. Make some friends there, and then work your way up. I'm a programmer, but I somehow ended up at marketing company for my out-of-college job, who happened to have Namco-Bandai as a client. Didn't stick around, but for someone in marketing, I can see it happening.

Alternatively, you could challenge Kotick to a duel. I'm almost convinced that that's how Activision promotions work, anyway.

#29 Posted by Phatmac (5730 posts) -

I hope Bobby beats the crap out of you.

#30 Posted by believer258 (12208 posts) -

If you know Chinese really well, then that's a great skill. Being bilingual, especially in languages that don't have any root in latin, is a great thing when looking for jobs in business, marketing, etc.

#31 Posted by Everyones_A_Critic (6311 posts) -

The only qualification of being the CEO of Activision is not having a soul and a sexual lust for cash.

#32 Posted by Fattony12000 (7579 posts) -

Guys, guys...

The joke is in the use of words.

#33 Posted by foggel (2764 posts) -
@Ubersmake: Yeah, hopefully my path will cross with someone in the industry.  
 @believer258: Yeah, I'm not fluent but I can communicate.
@Fattony12000: I don't get it.
#34 Posted by awesomeusername (4218 posts) -

@foggel said:

@awesomeusername: Good idea. I will need to hire some of the guys behind Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball.

Hire me as your lead director of everything on the project. I won't let you down. Pinky swear.