I get nervous asking girls out, even if I think they may like me. I feel like such a pussy. (I'm 19 by the way.) Does anyone else have this problem? How do you deal with this? ps- I know this is a video game forum, please don't mock me for posting this.
I'm a puss
The trick is honestly to respect the fact that you're nervous and then to act beyond it. Think about the step beyond your nervous state. Think about what you'd be doing with a girl after you'd already asked her out. You should try and think about the positive outcome rather than the state of worry because the state of worry is what stops you from enjoying the positive outcome.
@Video_Game_King: i've been fumbling around for it but I have failed as well. @Wolverine: If you knew it was a terrible idea then why bother?
You have to play things cool. Don't have any expectations about how it should or should not work out. I know that's difficult, but it's key. I don't mean go in defeated, I mean go in not caring how it turns out. Say to yourself, "Hey, if this works, then great, but if not, I'm no worse off than I was before, so who cares?" if you can convince yourself of that, asking someone out becomes so much easier. It's the anticipation of the future that freaks people out. If the outcomes doesn't truly matter, you won't sweat it and you'll probably end up more successful for it.
@Wolverine said:
Chirst, I new this was a terrible idea.
Now you figure that out?
I have no idea. If I were single, I would be terrible at it. I hope I never enter the singles market again.
The chances of you being interested in someone is mirrored by the equal chance of them being interested in you. Just accept that every woman on the planet wants you in their bed, and you should be fine.
Failing that, physically and forcibly strip her down to her underwear. It is sure to diffuse any situation.
@mandude said:
The chances of you being interested in someone is mirrored by the equal chance of them being interested in you. Just accept that every woman on the planet wants you in their bed, and you should be fine.
I can't tell if this is a joke or serious advice.
I'm kinda going through the same thing right now. I have gotten over the anxiety of talking to them. My biggest problem right now is all of the ladies that I'm even slightly attracted to are all taken. I won't be getting laid anytime soon. I just have to grind through it.
So basically I have no fucking idea
Out of all the people here, I won't mock you. I've made so many mistakes posting my personal shit on here, it's just pathetic.
Anyways, I don't really have a problem talking to anyone, because I'm weird as you already know; however, I do know a little bit about these situations.
Listen, if you want to ask a girl out, then do the uncomfortable thing and try it out. Don't be afraid of rejection or acceptance. Don't volunteer where you want to take them first, but instead give them the chance of telling you where they want to go. If they are indecisive, then you can suggest a place and then go on from there. What do you got to be nervous about? You'll certainly will be alright.
Take a chance, that's what I tell most people (yes, girls can also be scared and nervous to ask a guy out!).
I have more important stuff to do, just ask me out and we'll go from there, see if we find common ground, that's how I look at guys doing this sorta thing.
No need for hip clothing, big muscles or fancy cars, a simple question will get things going.
Unlike videogames, things don't suddenly happen because you completed another mission (going to your grandparents for a weekend for example, that's a tough one).
Go for it, you'll get over it if it turns out badly.
@Wolverine: @SSValis: If you have Girl Advice questions send them over to GiantBombXGAL@gmail.com. A real live girl and guy from the Giant Bomb Forums will be on the line shortly to answer them for you, posthaste.
@EuanDewar:
They're burn wounds. Dick.
@TaliciaDragonsong said:
(yes, girls can also be scared and nervous to ask a guy out!).
But do they do it?
But sometimes a guy is insanely oblivious to your advances so you'll have to outright ask them out.
Happened to me, saw it happen to a few of my friends, and some people are just too good to let them walk away.^^
Ghost rape@Video_Game_King: It's hardly a joke. To do so would belittle the many wonderful relationships I've had the pleasure to share with my many abductees.
@Grillbar said:
just think whats the worst thing that can happen. and go for it.
That sounds like a terrible idea, because some horrible things could happen, at least in your mind.
Everybody gets nervous when they are asking out someone they are attracted to. It's a good thing that you're nervous, that means that you actually feel something for this person. Just know that if she doesn't go for it there's plenty of other beautiful women out there. Don't get hung up on this person being 'the one'. That hollywood bullshit screwed up my thinking for the better part of my youth.
@Wolverine said:
I get nervous asking girls out, even if I think they may like me. I feel like such a pussy. (I'm 19 by the way.) Does anyone else have this problem? How do you deal with this? ps- I know this is a video game forum, please don't mock me for posting this.
a lot of people do. the only way to get over it to get out and do it. The more you do it, the easier it will get.
also consider this.
What's the worst that can happen if you ask her out? she'll say no.
what's the worst that can happen if you don't ask her out? you'll never know if she would have said yes.
trust me, having regrets is a lot worse than getting rejected.
well good luck.
I fully support this endeavor.@Wolverine: @SSValis: If you have Girl Advice questions send them over to GiantBombXGAL@gmail.com. A real live girl and guy from the Giant Bomb Forums will be on the line shortly to answer them for you, posthaste.
Seriously, if there's interest in it, DuskVamp and I were thinking of maybe doing a Giant Bomb Xtreme Girl Advice Line podcast for fun; not that we're experts, but we have different and fairly unique perspectives. She's a girl and I managed to do the impossible and seduce a girl off of a video game website, so maybe we can help. If people send in questions and there's actual interest, it might be a thing. Also, guests and guest hosts.
wimmin are human beens just like you an me dude.
talk to em like you would your boys, and if that don't work, you're prolly too gewd for her anyways
Just do it, dude. It's not as hard if they like you, and you'll end up being thankful that you asked her out, or very regretful later.
@Wrighteous86 said:I third this motion. If we really push it, I think it'd be one of the most popular podcasts on this site (next to the official Whiskey ones). Just basing that on the amount of times threads like these are posted.I fully support this endeavor.@Wolverine: @SSValis: If you have Girl Advice questions send them over to GiantBombXGAL@gmail.com. A real live girl and guy from the Giant Bomb Forums will be on the line shortly to answer them for you, posthaste.
Seriously, if there's interest in it, DuskVamp and I were thinking of maybe doing a Giant Bomb Xtreme Girl Advice Line podcast for fun; not that we're experts, but we have different and fairly unique perspectives. She's a girl and I managed to do the impossible and seduce a girl off of a video game website, so maybe we can help. If people send in questions and there's actual interest, it might be a thing. Also, guests and guest hosts.
@Wolverine said:
I get nervous asking girls out, even if I think they may like me. I feel like such a pussy. (I'm 19 by the way.) Does anyone else have this problem? How do you deal with this? ps- I know this is a video game forum, please don't mock me for posting this.
...can I tease you?
Seriously though, the way I deal with this problem is to ask myself, "Who cares if I'm turned down?" What's the worst that could happen? So you wouldn't get a date. You're not getting a date not talking to girls either so what's the difference? But, more importantly, you might get a date if you try. If you don't try, you'll never get that chance. So why the fuck wouldn't you try? Plus, the more you talk to girls the better chance you'll have to get a date, have sex!!!!, and get what you want out of romantic relationships (did I already mention sex?). So, just go for it because the longer you avoid something that makes you anxious the greater the anxiety will become. Embarrassment is temporary but wondering 'what if?' never goes away.
A month ago, I probably would've made a rude comment and would've said you're a pussy (I'm not a mean person genuinely; I just have a very irreverent side). However, since then, I've asked a girl out and she turned me down big time. And more that I don't want to get into. So I really don't think I'll be asking any girls out for quite a while. Therefore, you are not a pussy, Wolverine. But you don't really need a girlfriend... because you have... us! :P
@habster3 said:
But you don't really need a girlfriend... because you have... us! :P
But we won't fuck you. Understand that. We won't even send you home with a BJ.
@Video_Game_King said:
@habster3 said:
But you don't really need a girlfriend... because you have... us! :P
But we won't fuck you. Understand that. We won't even send you home with a BJ.
Don't listen to Video_Game_King; some of us will fuck you. BUT, we won't kiss you. Because that would be gay, and as a Southern, Baptist, white-supremacist, sexist, conservative man, I could NEVER have that
"Okay kid... I used to be just like you"
No, really - the best way to understand how to get her to say yes is understanding that when you get rejected it's not that bad.
The worst possible scenario:
-You get her to say yes
-You have an immediately fruitful relationship
-You find out she's got aids, and you had some STD you never even knew about
-You learn things about her personality that you wish you never knew about 3 months in - once the freshness of the love has worn off, you start to see how obsessive and clingy she is, and it's suffocating you.
-She tries to lock herself into the relationship by becoming really good friends with all of your closest friends.
-You realize within four months, you are well and truly fucked, and not in a good way.
Now, what you are actually afraid of:
"Will you go out with me?"
"Ew, no"
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