As far as I'm aware, you'll need to go to the hub city of Lion's Arch from your racial city (I can't remember any of their names...), whatever it may be. That will be the simplest way to meet up. There is a portal to Lion's Arch at all races' starting cities. In your map, the portals are purple swirly circles and, since an update a while ago, they should tell you where they go on mouseover. Setting a map marker in her location might even show you a path using the portals, I think it does but I can't recall exactly at the moment.
Your personal questline will begin in your racial starting city, and then transition into Lion's Arch around level 40 or 50, I believe. Not sure where it goes past there. The personal quests are the only character-specific quests I'm aware of, and you can party while playing through them.
So, it's just a matter of deciding where you want to adventure once you meet up in Lion's Arch - your wife's racial starting city, or yours? Story progress gives decent rewards for the level its set at, but you'll quickly find better items through region-specific quests. So don't feel obligated to complete them immediately. You can burn through missed personal quests easily, later on.
Hope that helps.
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