I don't know what you're all complaining about. Let me psychoanalyze things really quickly here.
John was a murderous outlaw throughout most of his life. Throughout the game, you think you're redeeming John so he may live a peaceful life. While this is somewhat the case, what he's really redeeming is his family. He's giving them a chance to live, and giving his son the chance he never had. However, in doing so, he creates Jack Marston, another Marston that wants redemption, this time in a different way. Jack, while his voice doesn't fit an 18-19 year old boy (only gripe with him) is a good boy. I felt an attachment very quickly with him, and I greatly enjoyed the last few missions. After all the fighting and hate that went on throughout the journey, it was a relief to finally live a normal life with John's family. It felt good to take Jack out and teach him how to hunt, it felt good going to help out Bonnie by bringing her corn, and it felt good defending my barn from crows. Are these all things that are adrenaline packed activities? No, but I just got done with a lifetimes worth of action. I didn't even want to touch my gun for any other reason than to protect the herd and my family at that point. They effectively made me feel like I was an old outlaw that truly was ready to start a new life.
Deep down, though, you know this won't be the case. You know that the fact your family and you are alive is going to be a short lived miracle. When the government attacks, you're aware that this is it. One way or another, you, your family or both are about to die. If you're assuming this, then John is assuming this, and he has to make a choice. If he keeps fighting, if he goes around the side, or takes cover and kills Edgar Ross and his military goons, he and by extension his family will never be able to come back to the farm. He will force Jack to live the life that he lived, and will cause destruction and hatred wherever he goes. He was already sick of that life of being an outlaw, long before having to kill the remainder of the van der Linde gang. He went out those doors at last knowing that his family finally would be left alone, that with his death, he will protect his family far more effectively than he ever could in life.
You could say this was redemption for him, in some way, and I think it was part of it. However, redemption can come in different flavors. When you use Jack (which I personally loved, I think you're all insane :3), he has one mission: To redeem his father. His goal isn't to overthrow the government, or to become a revolutionary and attack whoever supports the United States. By John letting himself die, he focused the hatred that Jack would inevitably have towards the government. Instead of holding a resentment towards a government that chased John, Jack and Abigail across the country for their entire life, he resented Edgar Ross, and only him. Once he got his revenge, he redeemed his family, and he can move on with his life. The old west is dead, there's no life left for those like John Marston. Jack has a farm, and plenty of assets thanks to his father. He can live a normal life if he wants, and like a great book, his end is truly up for your imagination to decide. All in all, there was red, there was dead, and there was redemption (IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE IT'S THE NAME OF THE GAME). Or perhaps like GTA IV's expansions, we'll get to see what happens to this apparently hated hero of ours.
Personally, I'd love to see this world during the late 20's or early 30's, during the formation of organized crime and the changing world of the west. It could even bridge LA Noire to Red Dead a bit, if Rockstar wants to build continuity between their games, as I personally would love to see them do.
At any rate, that's my forty five cents worth of how I perceive the ending. You all percieve differently I'm sure, but personally I find it to be a very poetic and sad ending. I would have preferred a longer funeral scene, though. The song they use gets more haunting the longer it goes on.
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