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jakob187

I'm still alive. Life is great. I love you all.

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Dawn of War II at Work (or How Much More Psyched Can I Be?)

Takin ass and kickin names, muthafucker!
Takin ass and kickin names, muthafucker!
We got the officially official word that Lansharx Gaming Center has officially been picked as 1 of 25 gaming centers in the entire nation to host an official launch lock-in for Warhammer 40K: Dawn of War II!!!  It's on February 20th, and I'm already signed up for it and ready to go!!!


"But Josh," you ask..."why are you so psyched about this?"  



Well, I'm glad you asked that (though I would wonder how you knew my damn name *GASP*, random blog reader of awesomeness.  Here are the top 10 reasons:

  1. We just got Company of Heroes reinstalled on our new PCs and working in DX10.  Aside from being one of my three favorite RTS games of all time (right behind Dawn of War 1 and right above Rise of Nations: Rise of Legends), I've heard that Dawn of War II is a bit more similar to Company of Heroes than it is to the original Dawn of War.  THAT is a damn good thing...as the only thing Company of Heroes truly lacks is an amazing turtle faction (which I know, I know...all you CoH fans will tell me I'm wrong, but I still believe that the Russians would prove to be an incredible turtle faction).
  2. This is the first time that we've been picked by the publisher and developer to host an event like this, meaning that they think we're pretty damned snazzy (and we are ^_^).
  3. I'm going to get a Dawn of War II t-shirt, which if it looks like the posters we got...it's fucking E-P-I-C!!!
  4. I really wanna see Dawn of War II in DX10, as well as on the CoH engine.
  5. I haven't gotten to go to one of our own lock-ins in FOR-EH-VER (yes, we're hosting our event from midnight until 8:00am, and then I'm going to turn around and be back at work around 3pm!)
  6. I need something NEW to play that doesn't involve the words "WoW", "Lich King", or "LF healer".
  7. Tyranids own your fucking soul.
  8. Did you PLAY the first Dawn of War?  That was one of the most polished and strategic RTS games I've ever played!!!  This one just HAS to be that much more incredible!!!
  9. The trailers make me almost cream my pants.  ALMOST.  If they had Anne Hathaway fucking Kristen Bell on the battlefield, then I would more than cream my pants - I'd lose my mind!!!
  10. Epic...mufuggin...logo.
So if you plan on being online the night it comes out, I might just have to hit you guys up on here.  Expect a FULL review on the game (my first in a while) once I get some good footage and such.  VIDEO REVIEW, ANYONE?!

And by all means, if you are in the Waco area, here's the information, fools!


2 Comments

Sham-WOW!: The Review

So last night, my roommate calls me up and says "hey, it's movie night...so let's have cookies and beer".  Fuckin eh, right?  Totally.  My buddy comes along (lenin from the third episode of Chess Club Massacre, known as Log here on the boards).  We've all three been talking about Sham-WOW and Slap Chop for the past week non-stop, and so when I get to the apartment, I find that my roommate has bought some Sham-WOWs.  Needless to say, we put these fuckers to the test to find out if that ex-Scientologist Vince Offer is lying to us all!!!

First Test:  Drying A Sweater

Unfortunately, we didn't have a sweater on hand, but right away, we could tell that this was failure.  You cannot fit a sweater into one of the Sham-WOWs, so in turn, we decided to use something that would probably prove a bigger test:  a soaked dish-rag.  After soaking this thing for a few seconds, we rolled the dishrag up in the Sham-WOW, squeezed and punched a little, then came to find out that the dishrag was...pretty damn close to dry.  After we let the rag sit for about two minutes, it was dry.  Therefore, we're saying that...while this doesn't go EXACTLY with what Vince implies, it works pretty damn well.  Grade:  B+

Second Test:  Drying A Surface

Lucky for the Sham-WOW, our coffee table at the apartment is a glutton for punishment.  We poured some water out onto the table, then wiped it up with the Sham-WOW.  After that, we continued to wipe up the excess water left behind, and then we realized that we still had to clean up.  What we ended up realizing is that the water from the Sham-WOW was actually being pressed out of the Sham-WOW and back onto the table.  We tried with little to no pressure, and this seemed to work a little better.  Overall, however, we're not impressed with its ability as an everyday wiper-upper.  Grade:  C-

Third Test:  Drying A Tongue


My roommate decided to try sticking the Sham-WOW to her tongue as a way of potentially getting rid of whatever illness we've had recently.  What were the results?  The Sham-WOW will even absorb the saliva from your mouth and leave your tongue feeling crisp and clean!  = D  Grade:  A+

Fourth Test:  Drying The Carpet


This is the one test that we were really skeptical of.  It just didn't seem very feasible.  Now, mind you, we didn't have any way to actually pull up a portion of carpet in order to find out whether the Sham-WOW went all the way through.  However, from just the little bit of Dr. Pepper I spilled this morning on the way out to work...I'm impressed with the initial ability of the Sham-WOW for picking up stains from your carpet.  There was no discoloration after I was done.  Once I get home, I'll see if it has remained that way.  The only bitch was that it took some serious pounding into the ground with my fist to get the soda out of the carpet.  Preliminary Grade:  A-

__________________________________________________________

From the four tests that I've seen with my own eyes and compiled, I'm convinced that the Sham-WOW is a pretty nifty product indeed.  While I think a Slap Chop would've been a bit more useful for us to have around the apartment, I've gotta say that I'm impressed with the Sham-WOW.  I'm curious to try it as a bath towel, so I'll let you guys know how that turns out.  Otherwise, the 8 Sham-WOWs we got for $20 were definitely worth the value so far.

Although, I'm still weary about their machine-washability.
31 Comments

Why Your Opinion of The Dark Knight/Ledger's Performance is Wrong

/start blog

Let's have a little chat, shall we?

I hate this picture, but it will become iconic.
I hate this picture, but it will become iconic.
First, I would like to point out that I fucking hate Heath Ledger.  The dood did not make any good movies other than The Dark Knight while he was alive.  While I'll still sit back and chill with my mom while she watches A Knight's Tale for the 100,000th time in 1 week (because fuck you, Mark Addy is the shit...and so is my mom), it doesn't mean I think the flick is good.

Second, there's been a lot of hate for The Dark Knight, and specifically focusing in on Heath Ledger's performance in the film.  Look, straight up:  I'm a Harvey Dent fan myself.  I can relate with the character as well as with Two-Face...on some odd fucking level that I can't even begin to describe.  Therefore, I was far more excited about the fact that Aaron Eckhart (whom I love in just about everything he does, and YES, that includes The Core, Paycheck, AND No Reservations) was playing a character that I loved.  Moreover, it was based on the Loeb/Sale version of Harvey Dent, which made it even better!!!

Meanwhile, Ledger's death came around and overshadowed the whole movie.  The fact that the film is a giant ball of doom and gloom notwithstanding, his death set the tone for this flick.  We can all be honest:  the movie wouldn't be NEARLY as big as it was/is without Ledger dying.  Whether I think he offed himself or not is my own opinion, but for this article/blog/rant, we'll consider him as just being dead, six feet under, end of story.

Now we come to the Golden Globes, and Ledger wins for Supporting Actor.  This is huge, people.  In the last 8 years, the Golden Globes and Academy Awards have only been different twice for Supporting Actor.  Therefore, it goes without saying that he's a shoe-in, and anyone else getting it would be a MASSIVE upset...for a dead dood.  However, I think in order to understand the importance of this performance and award being given, we have to analyze the movie itself...so...

It's tough to argue with an amazing scene like this.
It's tough to argue with an amazing scene like this.
Look, The Dark Knight falls into two categories for people (and I explained this to my boss, who didn't really enjoy the movie at all):
  • Mainstream audiences that don't understand why the movie had to be 2h30m+ in length
  • Comic book fans that would've been pissed if it was any shorter

When you take into account that the movie was able to impress both crowds, that's when you realize you've got a masterful performance on your hands and something that will stand the test of time...and trust me, Ledger's Joker will do that.  There's a lot of people that think of The Joker as being this laugh-a-minute one-liner hand-buzzer cocksmoker that Nicholson played, but most of those people...they've never read the comics.  They don't know just how fucking sadistic The Joker can be.  They've never read the Loeb/Sale stuff.  They've never read The Killing Joke.  They don't know how he tortured Jim Gordon by paralyzing his daughter in front of him.  Those people...they see Batman as being nothing more than just another movie franchise.  Hell, most of them probably wouldn't even know it was a comic book if it weren't for the popular media constantly ballyhooing it as being based on a comic!!!

Maybe you don't fall into that category.  Maybe you know your comic book shit.  If so, cool beans.  Nonetheless, trying to sit back and denounce what is essentially The Godfather of comic book-based films is just petty.  Besides, what would you rather watch?

Daredevil?
Spawn?
Elektra?
Ghost Rider?
Fantastic Four?
Howard The Duck?
Barb Wire?
Timecop?
Steel?
Bulletproof Monk?
Catwoman?
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen?
Sabrina The Teenage Witch?

An overshadowed and underwritten performance
An overshadowed and underwritten performance
Trust me, the list of BAD comic book movies is long, so in comparison...I'd say the fact that The Dark Knight is held among high between both the mainstream crowd AND the comic book crowd is a pretty good fucking indicator that someone is doing something right.  Moreover, when someone (even post-humously) wins a Golden Globe for their performance in it and it considered a shoe-in for the Oscar as well...then it goes without saying that someone is ALSO making quality films.

Offering some credibility to the genre of comic book-based films is something that we desperately need.  There's tons of hype about Watchmen right now.  Everyone is so fucking stoked about that movie.  However, when it finally gets released and everyone gets to see it, is there going to be a huge backlash against Billy Crudup for being Dr. Manhattan?  What about Patrick Wilson as Nite Owl?  Jeffrey Dean Morgan as The Comedian?  Will people flip out against it?  It happened to 300.  Everyone seemed to think that movie was the epitomy of badass, and then a couple of months later, BAM!  People that previously adored the film somehow decided that it was below.

I understand the need for elitism.  I'm an elitist myself.  That doesn't mean, however, that I'm going to be one of the people who discounts this movie or Ledger's performance because of the running time, his death, the character, or whatever cockamamey excuse I can come up with.

Simply put, if you don't like the movie, then that's your thing.  However, don't disrespect something that is pushing the genre forward.  If you'd like, we can always go back to the way my previous list reads...

/end rant
78 Comments

Games 'n' Things?

Recently, I was informed of a new store that opened in our fair little city of Waco, Texas.  Settled between the bosoms of Fuddrucker's and Johnny Carino's (two of the worst restaurants possible), there is a new little boutique shop called Games 'n' Things.  What do they sell?  Well...games...and, ya know, things.  These "things" happen to include crazy shit other than just movies.  They trade and sell IPODS!!!  I know, it's nuts (or maybe I'm just from too small of a city)!!!


Either way, I'm a DVD addict.  I might as well just take up heroin at this point because it would probably be cheaper.  That's...no...joke.  Games 'n' Things has become something of a new haven in Waco, mainly for the DVDs.  Mind you, they have awesome deals on games (and brand new, freshly packaged SNES controllers!!!).  They've also got these crazy FCTwin and FC3 consoles that are basically cheap Chinese/Korean-made top loaders that play NES, SNES, or Genesis games for around $40 - $60.  If anyone happens to have one of them *cough*JEFF*cough* then it'd be nice to hear a review of the things, as I've been dying to pick up my copy of Back to the Future and finally beat Biff's stupid ass once and for all...and maybe actually catch the notes with my guitar at the dance.

In one week, I bought 10 movies...just as an appetizer.  How much for them?  $40.  Granted, they weren't exactly massive 12-disc collections or anything...but they were still good quality and cheaper than going to Best Buy or some other place.  What 10 movies?  Well, if you wanna know, just ask me.  They're damn good ones, though.

However, this is a bad sign.  10 movies for $40 means that next week, it'll be 20 movies...then 30 movies.  Eventually, I'm going to be on the streets sucking dick for cheap Korean knock-offs and Bollywood remakes!!!  WHEN DOES IT END?!

They'll dance for a fee, but devour you for free!!!
They'll dance for a fee, but devour you for free!!!
Okay, so that may be a bit overdramatic.  Nonetheless, the whole reason for ALL OF THIS is to simply ask:

Is this a franchise?  I noticed that there is a Games 'n' Things in the UK, but something from the UK coming all the way to Waco, TX?  That's a far stretch, if you will.  Does anyone have any clue about this place, or am I just lucky enough to have a replacement to the now-defunct CD Warehouse to satiate my appetite for entertainment goodies?

In other news...I highly recommend that EVERYONE see Zombie Strippers.  That's an awesome fucking movie that only gets better every time you watch it.  Also, avoid a movie called Trailer Park of Terror.  While the gore was outstandingly good, half the time of the film is far too pitch black and you can't see what the hell is going on...and when you can see what's going on, it's nothing more than a supernatural version of Hostel.
37 Comments

Most Anticipated of 2009

So, obviously, 2008 is past us now...and again, I'm caving in to the herd.  You folks make me feel like more of a failure than I already am.  Then again, when I realize that I'm only 7 years younger than Angelina Jolie...I realize just exactly how much of a failure most of us really are.  =  /

Anyways, I figured I would throw together a little thing about what I am looking forward to playing in 2009.  Why?  Well, because it makes me feel important and...let's face it...I always seem to hate the things you all like and like the things you all go "WTF" about.

Halo Wars

Hate the franchise or not, this RTS could prove very viable.
Hate the franchise or not, this RTS could prove very viable.
Yes, I fuckin' said it!!!  While I may not be a huge fan of Halo 3, there was a time where I absolutely lived and breathed Halo 1 and 2.  I also kind of enjoy some of the mythos in the Halo universe, as I found out after reading Fall of Reach and The Flood.  Given that Halo was supposed to originally be an RTS, it's interesting to see this being a 360 exclusive.  So many companies (namely EA) have tried to make an RTS viable on a console, and I would honestly say that Red Alert 3 did a pretty good job of getting as close as I think it could get.  Despite that, Ensemble is at the helm on this one...and Age of Empires is the muthafuckin' jam!  Therefore, I'm highly interested to see how they handle the controls issue, but moreover, I'm curious to see how their RTS will play out with online play.  Could this be as big as the original franchise, or will it falter into nothingness and bargain bins?



Prototype

Death spikes + open world = Heaven
Death spikes + open world = Heaven
If you didn't know, I'm a MASSIVE fucking fan of Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction and still hold it on high as a pinnacle in open-world sandbox amazingness.  The fact that the guys at Radical are getting a chance to bring that same level of creativity and destruction to the "next-gen" (why do we still keep calling it that?) makes me mark out like crazy, son!!!  From the morphing abilities to the plot, even down to the way that the city lives and breathes, interacting with you...man, it's just NUTS to think of what this game could be capable of.  Still, while I've been anticipating this since it was originally announced, there is still that looming voice in the back of my head saying "don't get too excited, Josh".  It's just hard not to.  I mean, just watch it in action and you'll understand the crazy hype that this game should be getting and really isn't.

Darksiders

All outta bubblegum?
All outta bubblegum?
While there has been very little info trickling out about this title, the fact that it tries to mix a God of War combat system with a dungeon crawler sense just gets me giddier than getting a blowjob from Anne Hathaway!!!  Playing as one of the Four Horsemen in a stylized version of the aftermath from the Book of Revelation is enough to sell me...but I get to fight on a fucking horse too?!?!?!  I don't know, maybe this game will just turn out to be like Conan was:  good for achievement points and virtual boobies.  However, it would seem like the minimal amount of talk coming out about the game would mean they've been putting their nose to the grindstone pretty damn hard.  Here's to hoping for the best from this title!



Dante's Inferno

Can EA prove that they are capable of bring more viable, original IPs to retail shelves?
Can EA prove that they are capable of bring more viable, original IPs to retail shelves?
Okay, so it may not be confirmed for '09, but I'm just praying and hoping for it.  I've been very vocal about how much I wanted The Lost to be released when it was in development by Irrational back in the day.  Well, take that and mix it with the absolute amazing amount of polish and replayability that Dead Space had on it...and throw in a bit of "I fucking loved Everything or Nothing", and you can understand why I'm popping a boner over this game.  Although all we've gotten was a teaser trailer that presumably had in-game-engine-based footage, it just seems like the guys at EA Redwood are the RIGHT guys to tackle this one.  The fact that EA would even greenlight this project is enough to make anyone open their eyes.  Still, just like Prototype, there's that voice in the back of my head saying "don't get too excited, Josh".  We'll see when more info is released, but I'm gonna say keep your eyes open for this one.

Brutal Legend

ROCK THE FUCK OUT!!!
ROCK THE FUCK OUT!!!
Who the fuck ISN'T looking forward to this?  I absolutely despise Jack Black, and yet I'm looking forward to it.  Thanks to Tim Schafer's willingness to be bold and different...and EA's newfound willingness to do the same...it just seems natural to be excited about a game where you play as a roadie who loves metal and basically plays through what I would assume is the imagination of Tenacious D's dreams!  Actually...I think that's ALL that needs to be said.




Now, with all of that out of the way...what's the one game I'm anticipating more than anything?  You might be surprised:

Splatterhouse

This character model alone shows the lengths that BottleRocket will go to for interesting visuals.
This character model alone shows the lengths that BottleRocket will go to for interesting visuals.
If you look at BottleRocket's history with Mark of Kri and Rise of the Kasai, it's hard to not be behind this game.  While those games had a very cartoon/comic-book art style to them, they were still brutally violent.  It was actually one of the reasons the games were so fucking awesome, and BottleRocket definitely knew how to make an interesting and compelling combat system.  Knowing that they are developing a revamp on a classic franchise like Splatterhouse only seems like a perfect fit.  The screenshots all look absolutely gorgeous, the work on the character model of Rick makes child's play of other games in many ways, and the violence is so over-the-top that it's hard to not be drawn to it.  Sure, there is always that chance in the game just sucking so horrificly...but when you go back and play the first three games, there really wasn't anything bad about those other than the fact that they are old.  Maybe my anticipation about this game is due to my nostalgia factor kicking in, but with so little coverage out there, it seems like BottleRocket is doing everything possible to get this right.

And when you look at Mark of Kri and Rise of the Kasai, it's hard to imagine that they could get it wrong.

Thank y'all for reading, and now...for you!  What are some of the games you are most looking forward to in 2009 and why?
17 Comments

My New Year So Far...

  • My youngest brother got arrested for traffic warrants
  • My friend got arrested for 5 charges of violation of probation
  • An acquaintance of mine and good buddy of my brothers was shot in the chest and killed on accident
  • A buddy of mine was hit by a drunk driver two nights ago
  • My roommate is finally hitting on me but not giving it up and won't leave her retarded-as-shit boyfriend
  • I'm getting ready for whatever fucked-up shit is supposed to happen to me...

Hope everyone else's is going better than mine so far...
3 Comments

New Year's Nears Yew...

...or has already fallen upon you, actually...but I never realized that the switching of the first letters can lead to a creepy saying like that.  Wowza.

I got hammered on New Year's Eve with my cousin Belly and a bunch of our friends, and I quickly realized that Wii Balance Boards + Wii Fit + drunk people = absolute hilarity!!!  I wish I would've had a video camera, as Marvin was beyond wasted and couldn't hold a yoga position to save his life...but could nail 3 trip 19's with no problem on the dartboard.  Of course, once we got into some King's and Beer Pong, it goes without say that everyone EXCEPT me was incapable of hitting a cup.  This is odd, as I'm horrible at Beer Pong.  Nonetheless, fun was had by all.

The next day, I spent most of the day holed up in the room with my roommate's friend that decided to crawl into bed with me when I had gotten home from my cousin's.  This is the chick that bitched and complained about me because I actually don't hate Justin Timberlake, but I wasn't complaining.  It was fun.  After most of the day was gone, we had some Sheperd's Pie at my parents while we chilled and watched some movies I picked up before my cousin's on New Year's Eve:

  • Bullitt (Steve McQueen AMAZINGNESS)
  • In The Line of Fire (Clint Eastwood AMAZINGNESS)
  • Sold Out:  A Threevening with Kevin Smith (Kevin Smith HILARITY)
  • Flesh-Eating Mothers (great B-rated movie I had seen when I was 6 or 7, and my mom terrorized me with it forever by constantly asking if I had my milk for the day...)

The thing that makes me cringe about the New Year, however - I'm back on WoW.  *ugh*  I really wanted to keep going with Warhammer, but unfortunately, none of my buddies wanted to play it.  They wanted to stick with WoW.  I've already got my warrior Finlee up to 73 and my mage Shirlee up to 71 with little to no effort.  =  /  I'm working to not be addicted to this like I was before...and I'm hoping it works out.  So far, I don't feel any different at 73 than I did at 70.  I've still got season 3 gear, still got Skillherald, and I'm still wasting my time running more than fighting.  I really hope Wintergrasp ends up being worth it.

Anyways, that is all.  Hope everyone's year is better than the last.  Mine already is.  = D
2 Comments

Did Mankind Forget How To Read?

It seems like a relatively basic thing, and especially when you look at the fact that our species resides in the year 2008.  Over 500,000 years worth of evolution that can be linked and documented back...

...and yet I still get people that ask the most retarded shit ever.  It's not like it's just that they don't know.  That's ignorance, and I'm okay with ignorance.  I'm ignorant at times as well.  However, there's just the moments when people piss me off beyond all recognition because they refuse to do basic things.  At the top of this list is reading.

I work at a PC and Xbox gaming center, where I deal with every age of customer you could imagine - 5 to 70 according to my youngest/oldest search on SmartLaunch.  That's a pretty diverse range.  With kids, it's a bit difficult, as their attention spans are already short.  However, there's something in telling a 10 year old the same thing 8 times in a row before you just look at him and say "dood, seriously, leave me alone".  However, 16 year olds are a totally different story.  They are at that rebellious stage of retardation where they think everyone around them should bow down to the ground that they walk on.  I had adults that put me in my place when I was that age...and in turn, I put those 16 year olds in their place so they learn not to be so damned cocky as they are working towards going into the real world soon.

The adults, however, man...sometimes, they are worse than the children, aren't they?  This is where I start my example of "did mankind forget how to read".  Parents and watch groups around the world bitch and complain about violence in video games, right?  Well, here's the first solution:  start questioning a game that is named after a fucking felony, dipshits.  Hell, the ESRB even made it EASIER for you to read by using 1-letter symbols on the front and back of game cases...and yet you continue to avoid them.  Another big hint would be to say "wait, the game is called Dead Space / Left 4 Dead / Dead Rising...hmm, maybe it involves killing?".  Apparently, THAT doesn't conjure up anything in the head of a parent.  I would say that this is an isolated case, but I see it year after year after year at Wal-Mart, Toys 'R' Us, and the likes.  I can't even believe how many times I've looked at those concerned parents that think getting GTA for their 7 year old is perfectly fine, and then I look at them and say "you know you kill hookers and work with the mafia in that game...right?".  Always, ALWAYS, the answer is "really?  but it looks so cartoony".

ORLY?!

I remember back in the day when Joe Camel got ripped away from the packs of Camel everywhere, as well as advertising, because of the fact that Joe Camel was supposedly selling his death sticks to kiddos.  So why hasn't anyone gone after GTA?  Well, sure...it's not killing anyone, but fuck...neither did Charles Manson!  We still put HIM in prison, didn't we?

Someone in the forum recently brought up something about their parents getting them Dead Space for Christmas, and wondering how a picture of a severed hand on the cover didn't freak them out...and he's right.  How DID they miss a severed hand, an M rating, and a bulleted fucking feature on the back that said "dismember the Necromorph enemies limb by bloody limb"?  Did they also miss the description box that said "Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Strong Language"?

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not trying to police the world nor say that I'm a better parent than anyone else.  I am saying, however, that if you have to question whether Grand Theft Auto is right for your 7 year old, you need a good slap in the face and broomhandle in the ass.

Another area where I feel people could improve as far as reading goes is just in the general playing of games.  When you are on the menu for most games, it seems pretty simple...BECAUSE IT TELLS YOU WHICH BUTTON TO PRESS!!!  Someone asked me, SERIOUSLY ASKED ME, how they select a profile on a 360.  Blankly staring back at them, I walk to the TV and point to the giant fucking A button with "select" written next to it.  "Oh, I didn't see that".  It's bright, it's green, it says the word "select"...as a matter of fact, I believe that fills all the prerequisites of what you just asked me about!!!

"How do I get on Xbox Live?"...while the menu says the options Campaign, XBOX LIVE, Options, Extras, blah blah blah.

"What button to I push to shoot?"...while it's blinking with a RT button saying "Press RT to shoot".

"What's the orange line on Rock Band?"...as there is an orange line on the bass pedal itself + a foot making a motion to push down the pedal

I'll tell you, if all the companies dumping money into the in-game advertising industry took one step into my workplace and saw how little attention people paid to what is on-screen, they would probably give up on their endeavors.

And what caused this?  What brought this holy Hell down upon us, me in particular?  Do we blame it on the education system, the teachers, and the parents?  Do we blame it on the kid that doesn't care to learn or read or pay attention?  Do we blame it on the media and the corporate conglomerates that are consistently peddling their bullshit down the throats of consumers?  Do we blame it on people like Lil' Wayne, Hinder, Souljaboytellem, Nickelback, Katy Perry, and everyone else that comes up with some retarded one-line song getting played on the radio 7 times an hour and helping to degenerate the basic intelligence of our cultures?  Do we blame it on the movie industry, as they continue to push the limits of what is and isn't acceptable by mainstream standards with films like Saw or Zack and Miri Make A Porno?

It's obvious that we've come to a point where human beings refuse to blame themselves for their downfalls and errors.  Nonetheless, I continue to hold someone responsible for their own actions and try to correct them as much as I can, in the hopes that they will pick up on it and retain that effort.  For all I know, maybe I'm the unintelligent one.  Maybe, as it stands, I'm the fucking idiot.  In typing all this out from my blind fury, I really lost the point of what I wanted to say, which was something quite simple:  people need to learn to fucking read.  However, I realize that it's a problem much bigger than that.  It doesn't just have to do with a gaming center and video games.  It has to do with the general idea that people believe only one thing anymore:

They are the world, and those around them are the idiots.
3 Comments

VGA World Premieres: A Showcase of EA Changing Face?

Alright, so now that the VGAs have come and gone (and stirred up their GOTY controversy on the internet forums), let's take a look at the better part of the show:  the sweet snippets we saw for upcoming titles.  The list of games featured in these "world premieres" (click on link for all the trailers) are as follows:
  • God of War III
  • Brutal Legend
  • Fight Night Round 4
  • Dante's Inferno
  • Uncharted 2
  • Mafia II
  • Watchmen: The End is Nigh
  • Terminator Salvation
  • Gears of War 2 DLC
  • Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned DLC

Now, personally...this wasn't a half-bad lineup of stuff to show for me to get ridiculously psyched!!!  While I laughed at the Watchmen trailer and couldn't help think how BAD that game looks...and the fact that Terminator Salvation might as well be renamed to "Gears of War: John Connor Edition", the rest really excited the hell out of me.  Yes, that even included Mafia II for some reason, even though I HATED the first game...and I wasn't a big fan of the first Uncharted, but the trailer was exciting nonetheless.

So, here's the question of this blog is to raise a question:

Which 2 of the list really caught your eye and made you go "FUCK YES, I'M READY FOR IT NOW!"?

For me, it was easy to pick - Fight Night Round 4 and Dante's Inferno.  I know, they seem like very opposite picks.  

See, I'm a HUGE fan of the Fight Night series, stemming all the way back to when it was Knockout Kings on the PS1.  That franchise has NEVER disappointed me, and I don't think Round 4 is going to be anything less than awesome.  I watched a handful of videos before seeing this trailer, and the technology and changes they are adding to Round 4 just make it sound like a better package.  The addition of the R.E.A.L. AI system sounds like it won't just be a pure walk in the park anymore, but instead offer a bit of challenge.  The fact that they are factoring in someone's reach and body build as a statistic to each character means that some strategy will come into play.  I thoroughly hope they do some changes to the Total Punch Control system, as it was okay...but sometimes rather difficult to get the punches you wanted at the times you needed them.  I'm hoping for a better career mode as well.  While Round 3 offered a decent one, it was extremely one-sided and had no depth.  They could easily add some drama and spectacle to this franchise and make it TRULY spectacular beyond what it has already offered for so long.

Conceptual cover art for Irrational Games' The Lost
Conceptual cover art for Irrational Games' The Lost
As for Dante's Inferno, it's a concept that I've been behind for a while.  I've posted a few times in other threads about how it pisses me off that Irrational Games (which is now known as 2K Boston, the guys who made Bioshock) was never given the right opportunity to release The Lost.  This was a game they had been working on for Crave Entertainment, later ended up knocking the game down to a budget title, and then outright cancelled it and sold the rights off to an Indian developer.  What remained of the game was changed around (such as leaving behind the idea that these rings of Hell were very much like a Nazi concentration camp) and released in India as Agni, Queen of Darkness.  However, when you are talking about a developer that made amazing games like Freedom Force, System Shock, and SWAT 4, it just seems RIDICULOUS that you wouldn't get behind them making a truly unique kind of game.  Now, here we are some years later...and EA has Redwood Studios following up their amazing surprise hit Dead Space with a game based on a premise that has always either failed or sunken deep into development Hell and cancellation.  With the recent talk from EA CEO Ritticello about how he won't greenlight games unless they have a strong multiplayer component, it seems odd that he is greenlighting yet ANOTHER game that seems like it will feature NO multiplayer at all.  Could this simply be because the Redwood guys are onto something?  I mean, just looking at Dead Space catches the eye...but once you put it in motion, you realize that there is potential for that formula to work in MANY different story concepts.

Now, when most people think of EA, sequelization and franchise-builder comes to mind.  However, looking at their recent lineup of games, it would seem a bit...mixed up right now.

  • Brutal Legend
  • Dante's Inferno
  • Dead Space
  • Mirror's Edge

I remember the last time that this happened:  it was in the Genesis days...and they were making amazing games.  You couldn't say a bad thing about EA.  Everything they touched turned to gold.  While many will complain about the different mishaps and random patches of bullshit that EA has pulled over the last decade, it seems as though Ritticello is doing EXACTLY what he said he would do:  turn the image of this company around.  He's highlighted original IPs, given them HUGE marketing boosts, and even went so far as to take Double Fine's latest into their home.  If this were three years ago, or even two years ago...nothing of the sort would've happened.  Not only am I proud to say that I like EA, but it makes me excited to think of what they have in store for E3.

I just now noticed that both of my choices from that batch of trailers are coming from EA, and three of the trailers that were featured are from them as well.  I'm not trying to uncredit God of War III at all.  I KNOW that will be amazing.  However, it just doesn't excite me the way that Round 4 and Dante's Inferno do.

So how about you guys?  What trailers just made you exclaim "HOLY SHIT, YES!!!".
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Since Everyone Else Is Doing It: My Top 10 of 2008

I'm going to do this a little different than everyone else.  I'm not numbering my fucking selections.  I don't think I could honestly pick a #1 game this year, as there were honestly too many fucking good ones!!!  So, I'm going to keep this basic, short, and simple...just to conform for once and see how it feels.  In no particular order:

  • Dead Space
  • Left 4 Dead
  • Gears of War 2
  • Fallout 3
  • Grand Theft Auto IV
  • Grid
  • Crysis Warhead
  • Civilization Revolution
  • Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe
  • Saint's Row 2

Whine and complain all you want.  Those are the games that I have continued to come back to time and time again, and they are ALWAYS good.  I already know that someone is going to complain that MGS4 isn't on the fucking list, and for good fucking reason:  I didn't like it.  I also didn't like Little Big Planet.  As a matter of fact, I didn't really like anything on the PS3 AT ALL this year, other than Resistance 2.  However, MGS4 is a "love it or hate it" game, and I've loathed that franchise for a while.  It's just not my kind of movie...errr...game, and I don't understand all the fascination.  LBP wasn't a game, but more a set of tools to create games that are dull and uninteresting after a while because you realize that you can't keep all the COOL SHIT up on the servers.

So, there ya go.
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