It was one year last year since I had my incident that lead to me not drinking. It was at the last Easter party we had at my parent's house last year when I got so drunk that I passed out while preparing to eat cake, came to with my face in cake, and then walked my way upstairs to a room and passed out again. Around the 13th of April it will have been 6 months since my last drink. I knew it had been a year for a long time (well, since I knew that yesterday was Easter) but it didn't 'click' until yesterday afternoon just before we had another Easter party at my Aunt's house.

I didn't think it was on my mind much until that night when I had a dream that my cousin, who was there at the party, gave someone next to me a rum and coke and gave me a coke but it looked just like the rum and coke the person next to me had. She said, "That's just a coke because that's all you have now isn't it?". I shook my head 'yes' but felt uneasy because I didn't trust that the drink I had was just a coke. I was worried that she had switched the drinks on accident because they were so similar looking. But I was also kind of hoping that I had a rum and coke. So I moved the glass to my nose and smelled to see if I could smell the rum. All I could smell was ice as I looked down and saw a ton of ice and just a little bit of coke at the bottom. So I had to make a decision; do I drink the coke with the chance it might have rum in it or not? Before I decided I woke up. Now I'm not trained in dream work but if I were I would have had a fucking field day with that one.