Giant Bomb Keeps it Classy

Never let it be said that Giant Bomb users aren't classy, mature individuals. I mean, look at these totally respectful and not at all disturbingly erotic image galleries. So join me as we make our way through the disturbingly detailed erotic underworld of Giant Bomb! I warn you, there shall be many temptations of the flesh seeking to steal you away, but I give you my word that I will try to protect you with a constant stream of condescending, vitriolic attempts at humor.

*UPDATE* since the porn purge, some of this stuff makes less sense, but... eh, i'm to lazy to fix it now.

List items

32 Comments
Edited by JJWeatherman

Parts of me like this list. Other parts of me love this list. 
 
Edit:

I said yes! When's the big day?
Posted by natetodamax

Ain't nothing wrong with that Rise Kujikawa wiki. It's a work of art, I'd say.

Posted by McBradders

The best list on GB bar none for amusement and horror. Bravo, sir. Bravo.

Posted by TehFlan

Well, at least Giant Bomb is no Anime Vice. That site's image galleries made me weep for humanity.

Posted by Siphillis

Amazing what you can find when you look for it. 
 
Also, goddamn is Princess Zelda classy.

Posted by NubMonk

I know what I'm doin tonight!

Posted by Siphillis
@NubMonk said:
" I know what I'm doin tonight! "
Making an intellectual pass through Twilight Princess with a glass of red wine and Mozart in the background?
Posted by martellus
@Siphillis: See, the implication here is that I looked for this stuff because I am perverted.  However, if I wanted to actually masturbate to this sort of thing, I have a magical invention called the internet, which I assume would be much better at providing me images of world leaders re-imagined as Japanese schoolgirls than Giant Bomb would be. 
But yes.  I did look for this stuff, because I too have seen the "video game babes I would have awkward sex with" lists, and I wanted to make an interesting list.  So I made this one.  I was the 600 horsemen of the Light Brigade; suffering through the Russian's endless volleys  of  Cortana porn rendered in colored pencil, so that you may feast on the incredibly uncomfortable, vaguely depressing spoils of this inappropriately complex Crimean war metaphor. 
 
Wait.  What was I saying?
Posted by martellus
@Siphillis: I'm sorry. that came off as bitter.  I just wanted an excuse to make a Crimean war metaphor.  No hard feelings?
Posted by slowbird

1.  The twisted nature of the items on this list speaks to the immaturity and stupidity of today's youth, and is a sad commentary on the state of humanity as a whole.
 
2.  oh man look at those boobs!

Posted by Siphillis
@martellus said:
" @Siphillis: I'm sorry. that came off as bitter.  I just wanted an excuse to make a Crimean war metaphor.  No hard feelings? "
Never.  Internet grudges are silly. 
 
I was merely implying the endless cycle of perversion created by this list.  You're perverted by doing the research, and I'm perverted for clicking on all the links.  See? We're one big family!
Posted by martellus
@Siphillis said:
" @martellus said:
" @Siphillis: I'm sorry. that came off as bitter.  I just wanted an excuse to make a Crimean war metaphor.  No hard feelings? "
Never.  Internet grudges are silly.  I was merely implying the endless cycle of perversion created by this list.  You're perverted by doing the research, and I'm perverted for clicking on all the links.  See? We're one big family! "
Yay!  comments threads that are nice!
Posted by Siphillis
@martellus said:
" @Siphillis said:
" @martellus said:
" @Siphillis: I'm sorry. that came off as bitter.  I just wanted an excuse to make a Crimean war metaphor.  No hard feelings? "
Never.  Internet grudges are silly.  I was merely implying the endless cycle of perversion created by this list.  You're perverted by doing the research, and I'm perverted for clicking on all the links.  See? We're one big family! "
Yay!  comments threads that are nice! "
Yay!  Internet friendliness!
Posted by Video_Game_King
Posted by martellus
Posted by martellus
@Siphillis:  Yay! so how are you today?
Posted by TMThomsen

#10 "Let's Meow Meow" was one of the first wiki tasks, and I took on the assignment for the heck of it. Having never played the game (and by no means intend to), I had to dig up the information elsewhere. 

Posted by Siphillis
@martellus said:
" @Siphillis:  Yay! so how are you today? "
I'm feeling extra-classy myself.  And you, kind sir?
Posted by martellus
@TMThomsen said:
" #10 "Let's Meow Meow" was one of the first wiki tasks, and I took on the assignment for the heck of it. Having never played the game (and by no means intend to), I had to dig up the information elsewhere.  "
no need to justify yourself, my good man.  We have all done something for giantbomb wiki points that we later regret and/or causes an international incident.  Plus (and I cannot believe this is something that i am saying) 'Lets Meow Meow' is probably one of the most mundane things on this list.
Posted by martellus
@Siphillis said:
" @martellus said:
" @Siphillis:  Yay! so how are you today? "
I'm feeling extra-classy myself.  And you, kind sir? "
I'm splendid, my goodly sir, having almost finished a PHIL 301 paper.
Posted by Siphillis
@martellus said:
" @Siphillis said:
" @martellus said:
" @Siphillis:  Yay! so how are you today? "
I'm feeling extra-classy myself.  And you, kind sir? "
I'm splendid, my goodly sir, having almost finished a PHIL 301 paper. "
Indeed, that dissertation with regards to the works of Plato and Locke must have proven to be most arduous.  Jolly good job with your accomplishments, gent. 
 
Now, if you would be so kind as to excuse me, sir: I must return to my work in the field of Computer Science.  A rather grueling undertaking, if I say so myself. 
 
(That was surprisingly hard to write.)
Posted by iAmJohn

What the hell, pal; I didn't say you could look inside my basement! >:|

Posted by big_jon
@TehFlan: Fucking Anime.
Posted by TehFlan
@big_jon said:
" @TehFlan: Fucking Anime. "
To be fair, they've been doing a lot to clean it up recently.
Posted by afrokola

This list is hysterical, good job sir or madame!

Posted by Trylks

There are many concepts, games and characters missing. 
Soul calibur, dead or alive and other fighting series, will provide many of those. 
 
Oneechanbara, combat bikini, breast bounce, ... 
 
This list hasn't even scratched the surface.

Posted by JakeLogan

You're a brave man for stepping up to the plate .......or fliping over the stone to expose the creepy crawlies that are hiding.  Which ever metaphor you prefer.
Posted by Brackynews

Glad you like the Panties page! Gotch-a! ;)

Posted by Scrawnto

@TMThomsen said:

#10 "Let's Meow Meow" was one of the first wiki tasks, and I took on the assignment for the heck of it. Having never played the game (and by no means intend to), I had to dig up the information elsewhere.

I'm ashamed to admit that I have 3 wiki points for adding the Dream C Club Zero page. I still don't know what that game is about, though. Now that page has 215 screenshots.

Posted by WMoyer83

The answer to the question about Cream the Rabbit. Its because creeper furries are into that kind of thing.

Posted by YukoAsho

How the hell is Zelda here but not Peach?

Posted by evilCON

Damn porn purge.