It's really hard to talk about what makes NieR:Automata so special without spoiling major plot points and revelations. So I won't do that, or at least try not to. Instead I'll just describe my journey in experiencing it. I'm not kidding when I say it will be long, so if you want to stop reading here, just know this: you should 100% check out NieR:Automata and play until the end of route E. Trust me, you will not be disappointed.
My history with Yoko Taro games is practically nonexistent. I rented the first Drakengard game from Rogers Video back when it came out, before I even knew who Yoko Taro was. I got bored of it within an hour and returned it as soon as I could, never thinking of it again. In 2010, when the first NieR came out, I remember being intrigued due to the hype I saw online about the story. However, hearing about how the gameplay was lackluster, even from fans, ultimately dissuaded me from checking it out. Fast forward to 2015, to the Square Enix E3 press conference. I wasn't into anything SE showed so far until this bug-eyed, moon-faced man comes on stage. That was my introduction to Yoko Taro, and immediately I was into his whole shtick. Hearing him talk combined with the fact Platinum Games would be working on this new NieR project they just announced got me hooked. When the demo came out, I was into the mix of character action and shoot-em-up mechanics. When the PC version was available for preorder, I bought it as soon as I could. I could not wait to play NieR:Automata.
Release day arrives, and resolution hacks aside, I was into most of what was being presented so far. 2B and 9S were fascinating characters, and their relationship was something I wanted to explore further. The narrative was presented in a intriguing enough way that I wanted to uncover what mysteries the game had. I liked how hollow the world was. I absolutely loved the music (bought the soundtrack as soon as I could). I adored the cute, rusty, trash-can-looking machine lifeforms, and enjoyed any interaction with them outside the combat. Speaking of which, I was not into the combat at all. There was obviously depth in how you could customize your weapon and chip loadout, but the enemy encounters combined with the long timing window on your dodge never made it hard enough to warrant that experimentation. To see Platinum falter with the combat design was a let down. I got to the forest kingdom before putting NieR:Automata down, as I became more interested in playing other games that were out at the time.
3 months go by, I finish my time with other, more preoccupying games, and I was looking for a new game to fill my time. During those months, the buzz for NieR:Automata continued to grow everywhere I looked. Seeing the way people talked about NieR:Automata, especially route E, made me want to go back to it. So I decided to bump the difficulty down to easy, equip all the auto-playing chips and just experience the story. I blasted through what I had remaining of route A, liking what I saw but knew I didn't see what made the story special yet. I immediately start route B, and was thrown for a loop. The first 5 minutes of route B made me afraid. Not in a "horror movie scared" way, but in an "I feel like I'm about to be emotionally fucked with" kind of way. Man, was I not wrong. Route B is mostly a replay of route A, but from a different character's perspective. The new context of this different perspective adds a seriously depressing element to all the moments in route A. I finished route B, but the emotional cost wore on me. But none of that could have prepared me for route C.
Route C (and D, technically) took any happiness, any joyous moment, any good feeling I had possibly remaining for the characters and story and browbeat me into submission. Route C/D is a cavalcade of emotionally devastating moment after emotionally devastating moment, each one worse than the last. By the time I got to the end of route C/D, I wondered if any of it was worth it. What was the point of any of that if everything is going to suffer in an endless cycle of violence. Maybe that's the point, that existence is pain. As emotionally drained as I was, I was still glad to have played NieR:Automata. The metanarrative of the game set a very high bar for how stories are told in video games. As the credits rolled for a 4th time, something new happens that, depending on your choice, will trigger the start of route E. Route E is what I can only describe as the most emotionally uplifting climax I have experienced since the true pacifist ending of Undertale. If route C/D makes it seem hopeless, route E presents a glimmer of hope. That no matter how bad things get, no matter how beat down you get, there is always hope.
On July 1st, 2017, I completed NieR:Automata. I put my controller down, and pontificated on so many things. Mostly existential things, nothing that hasn't been pontificated on since time immemorial and by smarter people. NieR:Automata fundamentally changed how I thought I viewed life and existence. I have not stopped thinking about NieR:Automata, its story, or its characters since I finished it, and will probably never forget it. So thank you, Yoko Taro, for making this game.