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slowbird

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GOTY 2016

once again i had to scramble to play a bunch of 2016 releases in the last week of december just to adhere to my dumb rule that i must put at least 10 things on this list. that said, i think i've got some really good games at the top and the rest are probably good too but i won't know until i play more.

shoutout to the following games i wanted to play but didn't:

stardew valley (there's only room for one harvestmoon-like on this "buy cheap games before the sale ends" train)

pokemon sun/moon (i really need to play this but i am so bad at remembering i have a 3ds)

frog fractions 2 (i'm not quite prepared for that much wackiness right now)

List items

  • best visual novel ever, proven fact. it's yuri (not the ice-skating kind) and NSFW af (as foretold) but also very cute and romantic. the characters are really believable and wonderful. i also love the music.

    Game Of The Year, every year, forever. and also Drama CD Of The Year (x4 because they put out four of them) and next year the spin-off manga will be Manga Of The Year.

  • great game, great handling, fun map to drive around, but the "finale" was a bit of a letdown. also i still kind of miss the cheesy rival characters from the first horizon game, before the drivatars showed up. still though, letting me create custom challenges with really dumb themes was one of the best innovations in the forza franchise.

  • 2016 was a pretty good year for yuri visual novels apparently. there were occasional moments of cringing at the dialogue in this one, but mostly it was good. don't @ me. also i like the soundtrack, it reminds me a little bit of gone home but if it was a western.

  • it's a bespoke artisinal sorting wizard to help you manage those pesky motorsports in your life...ok no it's a management sim and it's hella fun

    don't start with the worst team though, i'm in year 3 and still struggling to get good results...and i'm in the lowest championship and to move up you have to be the best team and i'm going to be stuck in this 3rd-tier series for a decade

  • i'll never be "good" at hitman. it's pretty fun though. i like throwing screwdrivers at people, like...how hard do you have to throw a screwdriver to have it kill them? pretty hard i guess. but hey agent 47 is a superclone or whatever so it makes some amount of sense that he could throw a 300-mph strike with a screwdriver. and the special opportunities are really fun and make it possible for a dummy like me to complete the missions.

    plus this game lets vinny do things that make us shout "VINNY!" a lot, so it's good there too.

  • nascar is dumb and not the best. i like nascar even though it's not the best. i like this game even though it's not the best. such is the way of the universe

    haven't tried it with a wheel yet, maybe it would be higher if i had.

  • it's a board game, but also a video game. it's very interesting but also i am very dumb and bad at strategic thinking

    i can't put it any higher until i complete at least one match

  • it's a cool little arcade game, there's not a ton of content but the controls feel good and the tunes are nice.

  • seems neat. i'm averse to farming though, like just in general, but probably in this game too. i walked around the town and haven't farmed yet, maybe later though. totally gonna romance someone though. because that's what you do in farming games.

  • this game is intriguing. it's got a cool style and i think i like it, but it's too soon to tell what kind of anime it is. like, it's funny and well-written but occasionally a bit too "shitposting edgy memes" so it could go either way i guess. not sure yet if it's yuri. but anyway, i like the characters and the soundtrack. wow 2016 is like "year of the video game soundtracks" for me. can't remember the last time that happened. probably like 2007 or 2008.

  • played the demo, seems legit. i scored some goals, that was cool. i can't put a demo in the top ten, even one i played like 3 or 4 times. scoring goals is fun did i mention that

  • downloaded the trial but it was for ea access only. it didn't say that on the download page. how come fifa gets a proper demo but madden doesn't? is it because fifa has to compete with Konami's Pro Winning Evolution Eleven Soccer™ Presented by Pachinko? maybe...maybe

    or maybe there's a demo after all and i'm just an idiot

    it's madden so i'm sure it's fine

    i'll buy it when it's cheaper so i can make a wide receiver into a quarterback and run around with reckless abandon instead of throwing passes, because running quarterbacks are the most fun thing in madden
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