@thehexeditor said:

It's great that you're practicing your English. The story was so riveting I decided to make an audiobook version of it:

http://vocaroo.com/?media=vz5HbCAA4Kd5rhRZl

Great. A very nice read. If I knew you will read it, I would took some time on phrasing it better. Heh, I just wrote it down in like 5 minutes. I will now use some more energy if I make a sequel

@UlquioKani said:

I weirdly enjoyed reading this. The english may not be perfect but I think that adds to it.

I was such a nerd, that I actually played on RP server on WOW. I played a orc, so it was a bonus to not having perfect english.

.@Manhattan_Project:

I heard those pesky nords like to spill their guts after a mead and a glimpse of the local bar wench. Then they spread it out that your a wife-killer. It is the Night Mother that appear in the womens dreams. But it if you knock them out and carry them to your house. Lock them up in the kitchen. Otherwise women clothing can simulate women. Just take some clothes and cook your own meal. Throw some septims on the table. Then you have the advantage to not listen to their sillly comments.

I probably will kill Janessa. Or live her on the top of mountain. Once it took 3 days for her find her way to me. She is hopeless mapreader.

I killed my wife because I thought it would let me marry someone else. It didn't. Now I'm alone in this cold and miserable world.

I weirdly enjoyed reading this. The english may not be perfect but I think that adds to it.

It's great that you're practicing your English. The story was so riveting I decided to make an audiobook version of it:

http://vocaroo.com/?media=vz5HbCAA4Kd5rhRZl

-insert lame joke about "makin sammiches" here-

@PenguinDust:

Truly you are right, these women folk is always so complicated...

You and EightBitShik should exchange notes.

After trying out many pack-mules. Janessa fit my bow and arrow style. Also I must say those dark-elves make fantastic mule. Tall and strong, just like women shall be. Also grey-skinned so they camouflage naturally in Skyrims Mountains and wood. She can carry a lot. When I am in a foul mood and looking for amusement, I throw dragon bones on the ground. Then I force the gal to pick it up. She once carried 20 dragon bones, I cant see how she can handle the bow so nimble with dragon bones sticking out all over her back.

I must say, even I am being a wood-elf with proud short stature. Those long women are useful. But she have probaly bumped her head once two many times. Because she thinks she is a warrior. Even after nagging on her all day long, she want to play around with a big glass war-axe. Maybe it is some complex that Orcs can carry bigger load than girly dark-elves.

But one thing that made curious about marriage. Women cook when they are married to you. Janessa thinks a cooked meal is a raw Skeever tail. I must object, being a proud Bosmer. We want food that dont take half hour to chew down per bit. Also I heard they opened up a small business and give you 100 gold per day. Which is nice. Sure I enjoy my esteemed status at the Thieves Guild and The Dark Brotherhood. But free gold and a meal, is sure a good deal.

Also I told here that we will get a dog to carry our dragon bones. They are after all very valuable after all. I heard dogs like bones also. So she was happy. We got married. But I shot the dog with my bow. He barked and we couldn’t go hunting for game or herbs to our poisons. But she carry all my bones, a home-cooked meal and 100 gold per day.

Only one thing that creeps me out. She says, “I am your shadow on your back”. I have no idea. Probably she is plotting to sneak the bones in my backpack. Otherwise I made good deal.