Eh, no. Why is "writing for a female" this weird task that in the year 2014 people can't do? Why does there have to be any real separation between the two? There are plenty of examples of writing in movies, books, and even a handful of games that utilize females in a way that makes them strong, independent characters. Hell, I'm sure many of the gender equality pioneers in the industry would likely consult for a small fee or free (not write the game, just consult on the writing) to a small developer if they reached out to them. So, I think at a certain point, when someone uses that explanation to justify not writing a female lead, they are simply not trying to be resourceful to achieve it. That basically boils down to a lack of interest in writing a female character.
I think a much more justifiable response is that they just didn't envision their story that way. There's nothing chauvinistic about that. It's worse to say "we don't know how" in an age of nearly unlimited informational resources and examples to draw from.
^^^ This - very much this.
This isn't a brand-new dilemma rising out of the Internet Age. It's an age-old complaint that has been addressed & answered repeatedly in various media - literature, film, music, painting, etc. The best example that springs to mind for me is American film. Societal strictures placed on the content of films have forced all sorts of changes, including both limitations & expansions for the roles of female protagonists and secondary characters. During the so-called 'Golden Age' of Hollywood, there was no shortage of intelligent, strong, witty and self-empowered women, not because studio heads wanted them, but because female actors insisted. The combination of the Depression, the Second World War, the innovations forced by the Hays Code + a series of labour actions made it possible. When the country took swings to the right - e.g. during the 1950's & 1980's - this was also reflected in diminished roles for women in film.
Mae West, Barbara Stanwyck, Katherine Hepburn, Joan Crawford, Bette Davis, Rosalind Russell, Carole Lombard, Myrna Loy, Marlene Dietrich, Greta Garbo, Lauren Bacall - during a time when the studio system was churning out films across multiple genres these women (among others), made names for themselves without being resigned to simply playing stereotyped female roles in every film. One of the (IMHO), greatest films ever made also features one of the greatest female characters - Hildy Johnson in, His Girl Friday. It's not coincidental that it was a remake of an earlier film based on the play, 'The Front Page,' in which Hildy is a man. Rather than wholly re-write the character, Hawks had the wisdom to simply change the gender & some plot elements, while leaving the dialogue the same.
Women aren't mysterious alien creatures that need special decoder rings to be understood and portrayed in the arts; we're human beings.
TL;DR My short answer is: "I don't know how to write female characters," is an acceptable answer for a single person developing a game but it's also creatively uninspired. If a developer can't be bothered to do the bare minimum required to gain a modicum of insight into half of the human population, why would I bother to invest time or money into their game?
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