Paulrus' List of Video Game Commercials

Because Paulrus likes to make lists. The only order they are in is the order in which they came to mind.

List items

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/giSyRgWRzbI?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/giSyRgWRzbI?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    Because if I didn't have this one on the list, I would be hit in the face with a brick. In a sock. With nails.

  • <pre><object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/YqBBet5qW8E?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/YqBBet5qW8E?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object></pre>

    Bang bang bang. Vamanos Vamanos.

  • <pre><object width="560" height="340"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ccWrbGEFgI8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ccWrbGEFgI8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="560" height="340"></embed></object></pre>

    Still gives me goosebumps. It's beautiful.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/L6CPK97AbOo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/L6CPK97AbOo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH HATE BUUUGS!

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/gqkNPcUMffU?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/gqkNPcUMffU?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    Whatever stuff the Sony marketing department was smoking... never again.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/nrnEuetZ0LI?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/nrnEuetZ0LI?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    Come to think of it.... why sheep?

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/NJ-F9uErxK8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/NJ-F9uErxK8?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/VJATGXHVK-k?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/VJATGXHVK-k?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/oyP16Qg3UP4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/oyP16Qg3UP4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    Ty does in one second what has been taking Sega at least 10 years to do.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/bLbWVpXrgTo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/bLbWVpXrgTo?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    I like this ad because it doesn't sugar coat anything. "This is a game where you watch girls bounce in bikinis. Masturbate."

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/M0LfLk9lLEg?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/M0LfLk9lLEg?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    OH NO. COME ON.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/TmCze4DhZ3c?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/TmCze4DhZ3c?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    I don't miss the 90's sense of "rad." At all. Too much hip-hop-pop and zig-zags.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/1ZV9IlTJcIg?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/1ZV9IlTJcIg?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    Put a piece here! Put a piece there!

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/O012W744xP4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/O012W744xP4?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lYAqfEcUBPA?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lYAqfEcUBPA?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    "Tripping with attitude"? Look, Mr. 90's Marketer, I know it would be hard to sell a game like Yoshi's Story by telling it how it is (a nauseatingly happy toddler's book vomited onto a stack of construction paper) but why did you feel the need to try to make everything seem "radical"?

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JXrqhaBbe4A?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JXrqhaBbe4A?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    ^Could be reedited into one of those ASPCA ads.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ta0DlcxyY5M?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ta0DlcxyY5M?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

    This is your Nintendo commerical. This is your Nintendo commercial mashed with a Dire Straights video. This is the result dipped in fear, hatred, and the most malformed beings of the Uncanny Valley. Welcome to Hell. You cannot beat us.

  • <pre><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vJo9H0k5iAY?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vJo9H0k5iAY?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></pre>

  • <pre><object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/iHzdDOIppjA?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/iHzdDOIppjA?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object></pre>

    How to make a modern video game commercial: slow motion, no audio but the music, tells a story, said music actually reflects the atmosphere of the commercial.

  • <pre><iframe title="YouTube video player" width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/eeL9cJ5khHU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></pre>

  • <pre><iframe title="YouTube video player" width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/p9zvIJyF4M8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></pre>

    Plan B is to send Bruce Willis.