Alright! I've been told by a few people (JJWeatherman and PsEG, specifically) to start blogging. JJ even went as far to make a banner for this. He's just that dedicated, I guess. That's cool, right? Anyways, I'm not sure if this'll be a useless weekly/bi-weekly/monthly/bi-monthly feature from myself. Or maybe one of those magical once-in-a-blue moon details, hell, I dunno. I'm not a writer. Or punctual, get off my back, homie. But if this goes poorly? I have scapegoats.
Anyways, this should be pretty magical. Like simple dog of Hyperbole and a Half fame! She can make her own food so she never goes hungry!
...Anyways. I'm going to do be doing things that would normally make people pull their hair out or question whatever it is that they are doing. What will be the first thing I dive into that is horrible and something I don't understand. Reading a Princess Diana manga. You can read along with me, it'll be great! And you get to read backwards, if you weren't aware of that! Top right to bottom left, but you read the text like you would normally, top left to bottom right. IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE. SO MUCH SENSE.
Princess Diana
It's not too bad, I guess. I mean, Japanese people love people who aren't them, right? At least Prince Charles knows what he likes.
"My body! It's changing!"
"...I'm a wizard. And that looks fucked up."
Magic is what is causing poor self esteem in young people, not hormones! Mystery solved.
They go through a brief awkward flirting stage, considering he was out to see her sister and Diana's sister was all "Nah, girrrrrrrrrrrl, I ain't want him as mymaaaaaaan." Di swoons and has this brief dancing fantasy. I like to call it dantasy. Or fancing, even!
"...I'm a wizard. And that looks fucked up."
Magic is what is causing poor self esteem in young people, not hormones! Mystery solved.
They go through a brief awkward flirting stage, considering he was out to see her sister and Diana's sister was all "Nah, girrrrrrrrrrrl, I ain't want him as mymaaaaaaan." Di swoons and has this brief dancing fantasy. I like to call it dantasy. Or fancing, even!
I don't know about you, but when I dance with people, my eyes don't become soulless. And there is also no-wait, the shit is he doing with his leg? Diana, you so saucy!
I honestly can't read this because the English is so so so bad. (Or good, great, wonderful!~) But Charles visits the Spencer Manor to invite Diana's sister as a date/guest to a party. Diana is chosen instead and she stands there all awkward like any 17 year old girl who was blown off by her date and instead of saying anything, she is gossiped about for being a young'n and just stares at Charles as he dances with another. She gets all worked up because he's not returning her secret schoolgirl-love crush. And she has another brief moment of daydreaming time. He smiles while still dancing with this other woman(?).
I imagine this woman cackling like a witch and flapping off into the sunset. And while I'm giggling over this and she is mentally insulting the young Diana about not having a dance partner, this guy in a fly ass jacket appears:
The woman of the previous page is all angry and jealous, but as soon as this rather fly ass homie asks Diana to dance, she exclaims how she's afraid! So very afraid. And has had no experience... Dancing. She ends up dancing all over the entire ballroom, causing flowers to rain from the sky and make everything sparkle, shimmer, and shine. The other attendants are all flabbergasted and all "GIRRRL, WAT YOU DOIN'? NUH-UH, GIRL." So far, I don't like any of the characters we've seen. Unless Fly Ass Gentleman's Jacket is a character. But, hey, this manga has CLICHÉD ROMANTIC SETUPS. WHAT A TWEEST. After displaying our young-princess-to-be as a delightful piece of dancing lady meat, everyone at the party drops what they're doing, Charles ditches his original partner, Caramello. Wait, no, that's me being groggy. Her name isn't Caramello, but it should be! Then she'd be my favorite. And tasty. But anyways, girl dun get ditched, her eyes are void of color and her heart fills with rage. Diana goes to thank man in the Fly Ass Gentleman's Jacket (FAGJ is a character now, don't give a shit) before he disappears, but he's gone regardless. She knows nothing on his name and Charles pounces her on the dancefloor. You're so impatient.
Because I'm reading this over a scan service, I get adverts! From people who buy manga solely to rip the book apart and scan it for saps like me. *Shrug* Whatevs.
...Charles, don't act surprised that you know how she dances better than you thought. We all know what you really mean by that. Yeah. On to you. You're really talking about how she dances better than you! He says how he can't believe how all the Spencer girls are all good dancers. I feel like he's trying to say something else... IS THIS WHY DIANA'S SISTER BLEW YOU OFF? FIND OUT NEXT TIME IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF DRAGON BALL Z. Okay. Diana explains how when she is at home, she likes to watch her sister perform in the living room. And she stares silently, jealous of her graceful posture. Charlie, boy, the look on your face. It made me stop this before I get too far into this. I'd say I don't like any of these characters and wouldn't mind watching them suffer... But I know better than that. I read the ending first, that's how I knew. (Actually, I didn't. These are jokes I'm trying to make. I haven't had certain people around to make my jokes look good.)
Moving on, look what else I've been doing!
Mindjolt - Three Towers Solitare
I just started this Facebook game earlier this week. Why? ...I don't know. Maybe it's because that prince looks totally irresistible.
This game actually isn't too bad. Why? Because I'm kicking my mom's ass! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ...This is bad. I'm playing solely to attack my mother's score. Does this make me a bad child? No? Okay.
Twitter - Food Confessions
Earlier today, I made a comment about how I prefer to have
...instead of...
Then my sanity was put into question. Various friends and Giant Bomb users did not hesitate to call me insane. So what do I do?
I rattle off more foods I don't care for: milk, candy, most donuts, bologna, burritos, Mountain Dew, cherries, and grapes.
Newten, being a foodporndaily sort of guy, was one of the first to really snap. Oopsie. But you know what, maybe what I do isn't that terrible. JJWeatherman doesn't like lasagna, or Sweep! No longer a man. I killed grapes for another member by comparing them to eyeballs and one went as far as to say I deserved a banning! But what if I don't like toast? I can't be toast. Son-of-a-bitch. The things I do. D:
...And to think I was doing this as a way to avoid other things I could be doing. Like playing Brink!
The worst thing I've done to myself? Writing a blog. Why...
I rattle off more foods I don't care for: milk, candy, most donuts, bologna, burritos, Mountain Dew, cherries, and grapes.
Newten, being a foodporndaily sort of guy, was one of the first to really snap. Oopsie. But you know what, maybe what I do isn't that terrible. JJWeatherman doesn't like lasagna, or Sweep! No longer a man. I killed grapes for another member by comparing them to eyeballs and one went as far as to say I deserved a banning! But what if I don't like toast? I can't be toast. Son-of-a-bitch. The things I do. D:
...And to think I was doing this as a way to avoid other things I could be doing. Like playing Brink!
The worst thing I've done to myself? Writing a blog. Why...
Yep. Text Thing. I did it. Do it again, though? Maybe no. But I did use the banner made for me.
So now I won't feel as awful if I never touch it again! :D
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