Mario Kart Wii Review
Mario Kart has recently become one of Nintendo’s main franchises- while it has always held a place in the heart of the hardcore gamer, the DS version of the game has become one of Nintendo’s famous blue ocean titles. With the company’s recent shift to servicing the casual market it’s to be expected that the more traditional games would be slightly gimped, but Mario Kart Wii is still a huge disappointment.
The main problem with the latest iteration of the series is that it stinks of laziness. The visuals are, to be kind, subpar. It’s fair to say that visually the Wii version is inferior to the Gamecube title, Double Dash!!. The last-gen game featured better cart physics, more varied tracks and better animations. The tracks in the Wii version feel stale- the Mario Circuit feels even more bland than usual and no tracks really stand out like the cruiser ship or the Waluigi courses did. Also, where the hell is my Baby Park? Who was crazy enough to choose any of the N64 tracks over that little oval of perfection?! Christ.
The music for the new tracks is also completely mediocre- following on from tunes like Delfino Square's and the afore mentioned Baby Park's chirpy joy, the new tracks are completely forgettable.
This game feels like a step back for the franchise- there are no character-specific weapons, fewer Karts can be unlocked and the character roster has been cut back. But rejoice- you can now ride bikes and do mid air somersaults. Halle-fucking-lujah.
Beyond the poor choice of old tracks and shit designs of the new ones, further complaints must be made about the controls- well, the motion ones anyway. You have to wonder who on earth would prefer using the bundled plastic wheel over a traditional control setup. It does NOT feel good- the reason why people buy steering wheel peripherals instead of plastic shells is that the former are fixed to something. Waving a cheap piece of crap around doesn’t feel like driving, it feels like acting like a retard. End of. Fortunately the game manages to redeem itself by allowing plethora of alternate control methods (including the good old Gamecube controller) so you never have to touch the plastic wheel.
The infamous rubber banding from previous titles has returned with a vengeance. Pulling ahead through skill and perseverance? Not if Mario Kart Wii can help it. Blue shells are worse in this game than they have ever been, especially in the 150cc and mirror mode speeds. Winning in this game, even in multiplayer, is purely down to luck if all of the players are competent. Skill has been made even more redundant because the skid and boost system- the staple of the series- has been completely gimped. It was clearly altered to prevent skilled players being able to lap newbies, but when skill is this irrelevant, why bother trying to become good?
The main draw to this version is the prospect of the online mode- the ability to play with real people from around the world, compete in time trial challenges and crawl up the leaderboards. Mario Kart is the first first-party Wii game that approaches competence in online capabilities. You can see who on your friends list is playing, you can jump into any race they’re in and you can send pre-written messages to each other. This may sound primitive compared to something like LIVE, but it is a major step forward for Wii owners.
Of course there isn’t any voice chat support, so unless you’ve got Skype running at the same time (*titter*) it’ll feel like you’re playing against bots anyway.
In the end, it’s hard not to bash Mario Kart Wii. Being the successor to the best game in the franchise, Mario Kart DS, the crappy visuals, track design and gimped power sliding make it a huge disappointment. If you only intend to play it online you’ll likely have fun, but when it feels like you’re playing by yourself anyway there actually isn’t any point.
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