One thing I've been getting more aware of is how some of us like to rush out to voice our Two Cents on whatever is in topic, however relevant, before anyone even asks, sometimes even before the thought was fully formulated in our heads, perhaps to subconsciously avoid our fears of running out of conversation and being confronted with our constant and immense sense of loneliness. I've reached a point where I think most of these opinions are not even valuable, since popular opinions are, well, popular, so it is really rare for anyone to have a particularly insightful opinion off the cuff anyway. It tends to be the same conversations over and over and over again. Do I think like, maybe this time I can say it better? Was it even a different person that I had this conversation with?
What I've gotten sick of the most is when it is about technical criticisms. It now bothers me when I would, say, to use an analogy, look at a painting and say to whoever is next to me, either "well, I don't like this painting because I don't like the kind of paint it uses." Or worse, "I do like this painting, despite the kind of paint it uses." Do I really care what kind of paint a painting uses? Honestly, at the end of this kind of conversations, I just end up pissing myself off now. Like, I might care if I was a painter, but that is a whole other thing. What I'm trying to say, I guess, is that as a liker of games, there's not always a point to picking a game apart to no particular end, and it's starting to feel detrimental and makes me want to close my phone and go read a book or something. Something I've been learning is that it is not always productive to voice out criticism (not even constructive criticism), nor should it be given out without invitation or context (especially when it's directly to the authors themselves; that's rude!).
Anyway, this long ass preamble is kinda my way of saying that I actually don't care what design or technical problems Umurangi Generation has, nor do they truly affect what I'm getting out of the game, nor do I really want to talk about (or hear about, TBH) those problems to(/from) most people I know anymore. Not even the best of my friends. I'm just completely over it. I'm putting this as my top game of the year and I don't care to justify it to myself or to others anymore. I don't care that I played 80 hours of Hades and shit myself and therefore it deserves the top spot better, I'll just put these things on the list however I feel like. I'm tired of seeing things repeat over and over in an increasingly predictable and frustrating manner. These days I feel that all I want to do is just take shitty pictures of the end of the world, in a way looks right enough to my continuously deteriorating eyes (which is very concerning, by the way, with the way my hand coordination has been getting worse too), even if I don't know how to operate a camera, or whatever this painfully extended analogy represents. Maybe I'm just having an early mid life crisis, I don't know. Anyway, Umurangi Generation is at the top of this GotY 2020 list, and my top "Gamer's Resolution" of 2021 is to refrain from making too much specific/technical criticism on games, especially in public. Oh, but with a caveat I haven't mentioned. I will try to not make criticism unless it's REALLY funny.
