You:  Sup, I'm 8.
Stranger: sup! I'm 7
You: Don't even lie to me.
You: I'm so over that.
Stranger: I aint lying
Stranger: I so aint :D
You: Listen, you child impostor. It does not sit well with me at all that you try to pass yourself off as someone younger than they really are in a vain attempt at "connecting" with someone my age.
 Your conversational partner has disconnected.  

Stranger: Horny?  
 You: Very 
 Stranger: Cyber on msn? 
 You: Show me a pic first 
 Stranger: Don't have one but I wanna be fucked 
 You: Listen, I'm 8. I'm not about to engage in sexual relations online with someone I've never even seen before. 
You: Try that shit on a 13 year old, alright?
 Your conversational partner has disconnected.   
 
 
 Stranger: hey 19 m here..wanna see me cum on web cam? 
 You: Ignoring the fact that I am but 8 years of age and have yet to develop a sexual appetite, especially not for things as devious as this, but you're a stranger on the internet for Christ sake.
  Your conversational partner has disconnected.  

Stranger:  21m here  

 You:  8 year old male here.  

 Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger:  Heyyy

You:  Hello stranger, I hope you're in a better mood than I'm in right now.

Stranger:  I love dick

Stranger:  so yes

You:  That's a bit graphic for my age, but alright.

Stranger:  are you under 18?

You:  Will you stop talking to me if I am?

Stranger:  that probably means yes

You:  Listen, I'm really mature for my age.

Stranger:  that's what they all say

Stranger:  and middle school kids are having sex now, so i'm sure that wasn't too graphic for you

You:  When I'm in middle school, maybe I too will partake in sexual intercourse.

Stranger:  haaaaa, so you're trying to tell me you are in elementary? right

You:  I'll have you know that I read at a ninth grade level.

Stranger:  mhmm, it is possible but i'm not buying it

You:  I'm not selling anything. I'm just looking for good conversation to go with my cigar and glass of brandy.

Stranger:  why are you in a bad mood?

You:  Well, it's relevant to the topic we're discussing actually. People here are constantly asking me for my asl. And when I tell them that I'm 8, they immediately disconnect on me. It's proving to be quite hard to make friends here.

Your conversational partner has disconnected. 

 You:  My life sucks.

Stranger:  mine too

Stranger:  boring and sad

You:  What's wrong with your life?

Stranger:  it isn't going anywhere..

You:  Why not?

Stranger:  same old crap all the time, i feel like i need to get away from here..

You:  Why don't you do that?

Stranger:  i can't just leave...where would i stay...where would i go?

You:  Life should be an adventure. Take risks.

Stranger:  so i'm suppose to live on the streets...?

You:  I don't know, all I know is that I'd trade places with you anyday.

Stranger:  what? whats wrong with your life?

You:  My former best friend Robbie stole my slingshot. He told me that if I tell my parents, that I'd be a tattletale, and that the punishment for tattling is banishment from the tree house (Which I helped build!). It freakin' SUCKS to be 8, I can't do anything.

Stranger:  wtf

Stranger:  are you fucking serious right now?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.