I don't normally blog about this kind of stuff because, well, I don't think I should bother people on here with it. But today I will write something, simply because I feel the need to.
 
About a week or so ago I was informed that my grandma had suffered yet another heart attack, and that she was doing really badly. She'd been in rough spots before, but this time it was different; everyone kind of knew that she would not be able to fight her way out of it this time, nor did she have the will to do so anymore. I can't say I blame her. She's had to deal with watching my grandpa slowly die from cancer, and she has outlived more than one of her own children. On top of that, she's been struggling for more years than I can remember with her health, constantly in and out of the hospital, one thing after another. You could say it was old age, but in my opinion her troubles began long before that reasoning could be used.
 
So, in a way, for her, I am glad that it is finally over. I don't really believe in God, but I really hope that there is a place where she can be reunited with her husband and her children whom she lost. I think she's earned at least that much. In fact, I believe everyone but the most vile of human beings deserves that much at least. Life is often a struggle, with truly happy moments few and far in between, so a person deserves to know true happiness at the end of it all. If she doesn't get that, then fate is a cruel joke indeed.
 
Personally I don't really know how to feel, though. It's not like I haven't lost family members before (she was actually my last living grandparent), but that still doesn't change how I feel right now; which is to say, I don't know how to feel. It's strange, but I was expecting to be more devastated. Maybe it's because the realization hasn't fully set in yet, or maybe it's because, unlike other times, I was there for her during these past days. I don't really know, it's hard to put a finger on it. I do wish I had taken more time out of my daily life to spend some time with her, though, but I think we all find ourselves wishing that when someone leaves this world. I think that even if I had spent a lot more time with her, I would've still felt the same way. Or maybe not, who knows? I guess that is a question that will remain unanswered, no matter how many times this happens, and I will just have to learn to accept that.
 
She truly was a great person, and while I hate choosing favorites, I will always remember her fondly. I will always remember how caring she was. She may not have been perfect, but she is absolutely someone worth remembering for the rest of my life. I hope that she is finally, and truly.. at peace.
 
Goodbye sweet grandma, may you know true happiness at last.

It's cool that they're adding those features to the Xbox 360, and I might even use it every once in a while, but I'm not filled with an abundance of excitement.

Assassin's Creed 2 and Dragon Age. If I can't get those games I will be a very sad pup.

For anyone who doesn't know, a couple days ago I went on a trip to the states to meet my online girlfriend. I got here last Monday, so just a quick blog on what I think of being here so far. I could just sum it up in one word, but I'll try to be a little more detailed than that.

I got on the plane in Amsterdam early Monday morning. Unfortunately the plane got delayed due to a computer malfuction and they had to replace it. At around 2.30pm I landed in Atlanta, and despite the earlier delay I thought I would still have enough time to catch my connecting flight to Chattanooga. Unfortunately getting through customs and everything took so much time that I missed that flight--by a mere 10 minutes! Luckily I could get on another flight real quick, so things weren't too bad.

When I landed in Chattanooga I was amazed at how low security was at that airport, especially when compared to Atlanta. I was able to just walk right past the one checkpoint they had there, without so much as a glance being thrown my way. I can honestly say that I wasn't expecting that at all, but I guess that makes sense since most flights there are probably domestic flights anyway. Hell the plane that went there seated less than 40 people, and there weren't even that number of people on the flight (not the mention that I was the only person from another country on that flight).

I was a bit lost for a moment, but after going past the checkpoint I quickly saw my girlfriend standing there waiting for me. And man it was the most amazing thing I've ever experienced. I was incredibly nervous about flying out to meet her, but it was definitely the best decision I ever made in my life. From the very first moment that I held her in my arms things felt absolutely natural. My heart was racing like crazy, but not with nerves. It was pure happiness and excitement that made my heart beat so fast.

So from there we went too her home in Cleveland, and it really didn't look anything like I had imagined. She'd shown a bunch of pictures of the inside of her house, but I never saw the outside or the road she lived on. This place really is.. the country, and I can say that I love it. It's a nice free standing house, with a great big yard. And the rest of the city kind of reminds me of spain, except less crowded and with more nature. I swear, if I had a car I would be speeding up and down these hills/mountains like crazy. WOOT!

Ok so I'm gonna end it right here. I'll just say that I want to move here as soon as I possibly can. The city of Cleveland is a fantastic place to live in, and what's more important, she makes me feel better than anyone has ever done. I am without a doubt head over heels in love with her, and I'm already dreading the day that I have to go back. I want to live here with her as soon as I possibly can.

So I finally got my xbox 360 back, and the first thing I did was go back to playing the DLC for it. As soon as I finished it, I felt compelled to go back to playing the original story as well. But now that I've been playing GTA for a bit again, I started thinking about what it is that I'd like to see in the next game. Or to be more specific, when I walked past a pizzeria and couldn't go in it let alone order a pizza, I started thinking that in the next Grand Theft Auto I would like to see less places that are there just for show. I want to be able to walk the character I'm controlling into that pizza place, and have him order a pizza. Same goes for all the other places you see in GTA IV but can't do anything with.

In the next GTA, I don't want a new city. Rockstar has proven that it is entirely possible to have more than one story set within Liberty City, so why not expand upon that? Instead of putting time, money and man power into creating an entirely new city, why not just use those recourses to make Liberty even more of a breathing, living city than it already is? Expand upon all the things GTA IV has to offer, with a new character, and a new story. The city already feels quite alive as it is, but I want it to be so even more. Why not make it so that when you steal a car, you immediately get the police after you? Or at the very least have an APB out for you. Not saying that it should be made impossible to be a crook in the next game because that's always been one of the big things about them, but let things have more consequence. I want to walk around in Liberty City and feel like all the NPC's are just as much of a person as I am (if that makes sense), and while there are certainly times that it feels that way, most of the times I still feel like all those people in the game are there for window dressing. It definetely has a lot of cool moments (like just now I saw a guy get run over and people sort of reacted like you'd expect them to), but it could be so much better, so much richer.

That is what I want out of the next GTA. A richer, deeper and more vibrant Liberty City. Even more so than it is now.