@overbite: I bought it from a 3rd party seller on Amazon and opened it (and tried to play it) before I realized it was the wrong region. I checked my order history afterwards and clearly I just missed the region notice, so I wouldn't feel right returning it and sticking it to that seller. I might try to sell it but I'm worried someone will make the same mistake I made and I'd prefer to avoid that.
The good news is I found a solution but I'm pretty sure answer is "random magic," so for anyone else with the same problem, your results may vary. The last straw that made me start this thread was after signing up for a Showtime membership on Amazon to stream the movie (yes, Showtime, not Shudder), I was queued up to watch and was at the starting title screen and listening for Alex to count it down. He/Vinny stated the screen said "2000", and the video I had queued up said "2001." That's when I posted the thread looking for help.
Shortly therafter, I gave up and decided to just watch the different version and resync when possible. Ten seconds after pressing play, the video froze, and then put up a message saying my device (my PS4) didn't have enough bandwidth to stream the video. After another try, I gave up again and took a nap. When I came back after my nap, that's when the Leprechauns kicked in. Not only did the title screen now say "2000," but the run time was now 114 minutes. It worked perfectly and I just finished watching. I guess I don't really know how streaming services work, and it doesn't really seem possible that Showtimes is rng-ing your options, but I swear that's what happened.
Your results my vary. Since the Showtime trial is free on Amazon, this may be worth a try to anyone else in the same boat. That said, thanks to all for the suggestions.
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