I’m still at it, forgot why? Read my initial blog here!

I loved RE4 back in the day, and I found out I love it still now, read more here.

I honestly don’t want to spend very much time on this game, in short, I absolutely hated Resident Evil: Revelations. Alright, thanks everyone for stopping by.

On to...

If only I could be let off so easily. Essentially from beginning to end I thought everything about the game was a mess, or misstep, or mishandled, or misguided, boring, annoying, etc. My perception of the general audience’s perception of the game was that it was good to mediocre, had some redeemable qualities but overall was a good experience that seemed to correct and realign the franchise in a way that hardcore fans wanted them to return to. Again, that was my perception and what I thought going in. Afterwards, I’m honestly surprised anyone was like “Oh yeah, Revelations 2 was announced (released), let’s do this!” That may shine some light on RE6…. At this point, I won’t be surprised if my writing isn’t very clear, I tend to bungle up my words and thoughts when I’m emotionally writing about something in either a very positive/negative way, so let’s begin and I apologize if I make zero sense.

My biggest issue with the game is the story and how it was laid out. I could very well see my opinion change from hatred to a shrug level of acceptance if the story and layout of the plot wasn’t such a god damn travesty. First off, I hate multiple playable characters that are alternating as the story is laid out to us. I didn’t like it very much in the Call of Duty games that I’ve played (do they still do this?) and just don’t think it works, it especially doesn’t work when the story is jumping back and forth through time and therefore means there is going to be no consequences for their (or others) actions. See how events play out from others perspectives is an interesting idea that could be interesting, do some world building and show motivations for others, Revelations doesn’t do any of that. If the story was more or less just Jill, Parker and the ship with Chris showing up later in the game, it would’ve worked much better and ultimately even the weak story wouldn’t have been that much of an issue. These are Resident Evil games, for the most part they don’t have amazing stories, they are fun, silly, campy and in general harmless. Revelations was trying to be way smarter than it thought but, shocker, the plot twists were shown a mile away if not from the moment you met characters you knew what they were going to eventually do. Say what you will about CVX, but finding out that Ashford was crazy and was dressing up as his sister was a plot twist that surprised and engaged me in what was going on. Finding out the head dude was bad was obvious from the get go, Jessica being bad was obvious, Raymond being a poorly designed character, poorly acted character, and in general just terrible was not a twist. Alright, Parker being involved somehow was a “twist,” I wasn’t surprised but I did go huh, didn’t absolutely see that happening. Even then I didn’t even know what the fuck he was actually doing that made him involved in the process, just like everything else in the game made little to no sense as it was playing out. When I finish a game, but have to go find a synopsis because I have no idea what just transpired, that is not a good thing. It either means there was so much going on I couldn’t keep up despite grabbing my attention (The Godfather or Sapranos for me, something about Italian names just throws me off when I try to follow films, tv shows, etc), you info dumped at the end and I didn’t catch everything so I wanted to reconfirm what I learned and what I might have missed, or I was so bored and done with your product that I don’t care and just want to move on at this point….. yet I want to know what happened still. RE Rev is somewhere between 2 and 3, they saved so much plot for the end (hey, it IS a Resident Evil game after all) AND I was so annoyed and bored that I literally just put the controller down at the last boss and said fuck this, and hoped that the credits would roll soon. BUT OH WAIT, there’s more, another fucking flashback that explains little to nothing, again there’s more, another boss battle that was extremely fucked and bullshit (I’ll take the blame on this, I was so mad that I had to continue playing that I wasn’t actually doing that great in the fight and that made me even more mad, honestly the last battle was alright). Finally credits….. and another bullshit cutscene that means nothing with two characters that don’t matter, that haven’t returned since nor should they…alright I’m done with that.

No I can’t, what the fuck is up with some of the design choices in this game? Who the hell designed Raymond, gave him Conan hair with a shitty shade of red and said THAT is our plot twist/bad guy/hench man. You know what, if they actually got Conan to do that performance, this is an amazing game……alright I checked, it wasn’t Conan. What was up with Jessica’s outfit? When I can tell someone is bad JUST by what they were wearing, you done fucked up. See how Jill was wearing a full body suit but was still Sexy…. Jessica tried to one up her….by cutting an entire leg cover off? To impress and seduce Chris? What? Man…..

I don’t want to talk in detail about other negatives, I’ll just list others and if someone wants to counter I would love to read thoughts and reply in the comments.

• The controls were terrible; the aimer was awful. I played the PS3 version, maybe the ports were that bad, I doubt it. If there was some form of run button I think that would’ve helped me personally, it felt really uncomfortable to try and “run” while turning, just never got the hang of that so I had to stop, turn, then run, etc.
• The Magnum was shit, they ruined the magnum, my favorite weapon type in these games was useless, thanks.
• I thought the enemy types were dumb, even though Oozes are more parallel to zombies than the basic enemies in 4, 5, 6, it just didn’t work for me. I have stated before I’m not a big fan of the slimy, squidy styles that the series eventually turned to.
• Oh my god, these are probably my least favorite version of the hunters in the games so far. So fucking annoying.
• Outside of Raymond, “Jackass” is one of the worst characters I’ve seen in a while. Give him a nasally, whiney voice, incredibly nerdy, stupid headgear and a nickname like Jackass, you will get one of the worst characters in the series. Even better is that the character who you control with him has zero personality and I didn’t even know his name until the credits…and immediately didn’t remember it.
• Turret sequences!!!!!

Now talk about some positives…positives…positives…as a whole I didn’t think the ship was a bad setting. There could’ve been more involved in the setting, but other things took away from it, but for what it was I didn’t enjoy the ship parts, had a good atmosphere occasionally. Rachel was a good boss, a nice homage to Nemesis, and was saddened that she didn’t show up in some capacity in the end and have some effect on something within the story or events that took place. Regardless the design was creepy and the very first encounter(s) were some of the few highlights I have of the game. Stated earlier, the ending boss, now that I look back on it, was fun, interesting, and different. I could’ve performed better during the fight and become less frustrated but it was a loss cause at the end so I’m giving the Abyss Tyrant (forgot his actual name) a pass. Oh and the giant boss that you fight after he fucks up the elevator was pretty good too. The guns and customization stuff was interesting and led me to spend more time than I should’ve swapping upgrades and trying to find the best match for my style and weapons. Not great and downgraded some weapons overall, but was an interesting, somewhat successful idea. Parker was alright, wouldn’t mind seeing him in the future…..yup.

I don’t know what I really expected from the game before I started, maybe something in between RE3 in terms of I find the game fine/tolerable and RE4 in terms of combat, what I got was a frustrating, boring experience that as I continued to play and advance, I got more and more annoyed. If I wasn’t doing these blogs or had a goal to play all these games, I would’ve quit playing…..around chapter 8, 9 or 10, and I rarely quit games. When I quit playing your game, or reeeeeeeally want to quit playing your game but continue out of ulterior motives (Revelations for blogs/RE series playthrough, BF4 for only game on the PS4) that means I find your product a waste of my time and ultimately fucking garbage.Told you I didn't want to spend much time with this, sorry for writing too much but I'm not even going to take the time to find pictures/gifs to go with this blog, I just want to be done with RE Revelations.

AND I’M STILL incredibly excited to jump into RE5, like tonight or tomorrow (at the time of this writing). And that says a lot. I played RE5 at the time the game was launched, this coincided with my……..3^rd(?) attempt at being a fan of the franchise, and proceeded to end with 5 (I could’ve reread my initial blog to find out but I’m too lazy right now). I accept 5 as a good/fun game that I enjoyed my time with, but it was not the follow up to 4 that I wanted at THAT time. Unfortunately I lost my RE5 save on my YLOD PS3 so I won’t be able to just play with all the weapons I had unlocked and fully maxed, that wouldn’t be a pure experience so it is probably for the best that I’m doing a fresh playthrough. Anyways….

On to…or you can read my thoughts on RE5, CRAZY, right here!