Things Chie Would Enjoy More If They Were Like Steak
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Chie is a passionate person when she sets her mind to it, but academia isn't something that arouses such feelings in her. You only need to take a look at her grades to see the evidence. Part of the problem, I think, is that she can't relate to and process information from textbooks since they're distinctively un-steak like. They have no taste. They're more often than not pretty dusty. The textures leave a lot to be desired. And worst of all, they give papercuts, which steaks never do. If textbooks could be changed to consist more of steak-like material, then maybe Chie could get aboard the education train and finally learn something. Besides, learning is like INGESTING INFORMATION WITH YOUR MIND.
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Although people have gotten better at cooking it over the years, you can still tell when a substitute food is made out of tofu. You can manipulate the taste pretty easily, but that texture isn't exactly going away. If that could somehow be resolved so steak-flavored tofu could taste and feel like steak, then Chie would probably have more reason to go to Rise's work place and actually acknowledge her existence.
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As a fan of kung fu movies, the typical soundtracks for those make me think that Chie isn't much of a fan of rock music. That's too bad, because it's a genre that still speaks to and moves a lot of people today. If bands like Coheed and Cambria and Dragonforce spent more of their ballads weaving epic tales about the adventures of steaks, however, I think Chie would get on board.
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Chie probably would have become a better friend to Yukiko sooner if she had just realized how much like steak her favorite gal pal really is. Just saying is all.
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Chie doesn't seem to be on the up-and-up when it comes to her political or economic news. This isn't all that surprising. Not a whole lot of people pay attention at her age and a lot of that stuff is particularly complex to begin with in Japan. It's still unfortunate, though, because if people explained concepts like deficits and GDPs to her in terms of steaks and their consumption, I'm sure she'd greatly enjoy discussing them.
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The two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive, but the fact that most steaks don't come between two pieces of bread means that Chie probably isn't fond of that incarnation of her favorite edible animal, the cow. If McDonald's and Burger King changed their ways, though, I bet she'd agree that hamburgers are a pretty awesome not-sammich.
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They sing about everything but steak. Somebody should get them back together for a reunion tour so they can do something about that.
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If only the cartridge had been made out of steak, then maybe things could have turned out differently.
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I hear a lot of things could have made The Bouncer a better game all around. I bet the inclusion of steak somewhere would have gone a pretty long way. Maybe in the remake.
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Although Chie might like the upcoming Karate Kid remake since it features kung fu instead of, you know, karate, the fact that the original movie is vice versa means it has no way of ever winning her heart. If there had just been one scene, ONE, where Mr. Miyagi made Daniel-san eat some steak for training, the reception of the movie on her part could have gone so much better.
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Replace all the vomit with steaks and you might finally be onto something, Seth McFarlane.
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The one way you could make steak even better is by making it even more steakier. Am I right or am I right?
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Segata Sanshirou is about the closest a human being has ever come to being a steak as it is. He makes things explode by wrestling them. Just like steak. He dresses up like Santa to scare little kids into buying the Sega Saturn. Just like steak. He performs CPR in the middle of a burning building to save a Japanese beauty's life. Just like steak. If he just took the one step further and transfigured himself into a blob of beef, he would truly be a steak, once and for all.
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Most people argue that Brutal Legend overextended itself and was too ambitious of a game, taking on more genres than it could handle. Not Chie, though. Chie thought the RTS, open-world, and God of War-like fighting mechanics all worked in harmony just fine, but that the lack of steak-related gameplay ultimately made the game fall flat to her. Should they fix that in a sequel, she'd totally get on board.
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Chie, like a lot of other Japanese folks, isn't the most religious person you'll find in her country. She's a kid with other stuff on her mind, so it's understandable. Regardless, although Bible Adventures does in fact have gameplay revolving around cows (and the lifting of them), the fact that they aren't actually steaks according to the game's interpretation of the Bible just doesn't do much to illicit interest from her. If somebody at Wisdom Tree could change it so you loaded two STEAKS onto the ark, then she'd probably get way into it.
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