If the Giantbomb quest system was designed by...

BioWare

I would have the following dialogue options:

  • [Renegade+10] Punch Jeff for insinuating that I've to work for my rewards
  • [Renegade+5] Intimidate Jeff by telling him that withholding rewards can be bad for his health
  • I don't have time for this...
  • Tell me more about this quest...
  • [Paragon+5] Sweet talk Jeff into giving me extra xp for no good reason
  • [Paragon+10] Complete the quest promptly while also posting hints for others

*All wiki pages are now fully voiced by the Giantbomb crew.

GSC Gameworld (the S.T.A.L.K.E.R guys)

After visiting the quest log, I would

  • Kill Dave for introducing me to the quest system
  • Complete the quest and then kill Dave for extra xp
  • Browse all day for the answers, get lost in the giant database and then come back to kill Dave
  • Try to complete the quest and get betrayed/ambushed by Dave. Obviously, I'd have to kill Dave in this scenario too.

*The entire site is now available only in the brown shade and requires the flashlight page to be open at all times for proper viewing.

From Software

  • Users have 30 mins to complete all quests. Failure to do so redirects users to the Death page and halves the screensize.
  • Users can leave sticky notes on top of each page to help others with their quest.
  • In the ultimate invasion of privacy, you can now watch glimpses of what others are browsing.

*Visiting the Death page results in loss of all wiki points and user levels.

Square Enix

  • Clicking on any link might direct you to the Vanille page.
  • Once you arrive on a quest related page, you're automatically put on a guided tour of the site.
  • Upon restarting GB in a new tab, you'll be given two options: Press X to continue the tour or close the browser.

*Giantbomb is now available in fuchsia, cyan and lime themes. Also, the "bomb" now sports a zipper.

Bethesda

Upon receiving a quest, users have the option to:

  • Try to complete the quest by clicking on links but fail due to the janky code
  • Continuously refresh the "Jump" page to increase level
  • Turn into a vampire by visiting the vampire page
  • Contribute to the Horse Armor page for +100 XP & a slightly prettier load screen.

*Clicking on any wiki page now automatically plays Morrowind's theme song.

Valve or Blizzard

Still in development.

I totally did this for the blog quest.

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16 Comments
Posted by Spacetrucking

BioWare

I would have the following dialogue options:

  • [Renegade+10] Punch Jeff for insinuating that I've to work for my rewards
  • [Renegade+5] Intimidate Jeff by telling him that withholding rewards can be bad for his health
  • I don't have time for this...
  • Tell me more about this quest...
  • [Paragon+5] Sweet talk Jeff into giving me extra xp for no good reason
  • [Paragon+10] Complete the quest promptly while also posting hints for others

*All wiki pages are now fully voiced by the Giantbomb crew.

GSC Gameworld (the S.T.A.L.K.E.R guys)

After visiting the quest log, I would

  • Kill Dave for introducing me to the quest system
  • Complete the quest and then kill Dave for extra xp
  • Browse all day for the answers, get lost in the giant database and then come back to kill Dave
  • Try to complete the quest and get betrayed/ambushed by Dave. Obviously, I'd have to kill Dave in this scenario too.

*The entire site is now available only in the brown shade and requires the flashlight page to be open at all times for proper viewing.

From Software

  • Users have 30 mins to complete all quests. Failure to do so redirects users to the Death page and halves the screensize.
  • Users can leave sticky notes on top of each page to help others with their quest.
  • In the ultimate invasion of privacy, you can now watch glimpses of what others are browsing.

*Visiting the Death page results in loss of all wiki points and user levels.

Square Enix

  • Clicking on any link might direct you to the Vanille page.
  • Once you arrive on a quest related page, you're automatically put on a guided tour of the site.
  • Upon restarting GB in a new tab, you'll be given two options: Press X to continue the tour or close the browser.

*Giantbomb is now available in fuchsia, cyan and lime themes. Also, the "bomb" now sports a zipper.

Bethesda

Upon receiving a quest, users have the option to:

  • Try to complete the quest by clicking on links but fail due to the janky code
  • Continuously refresh the "Jump" page to increase level
  • Turn into a vampire by visiting the vampire page
  • Contribute to the Horse Armor page for +100 XP & a slightly prettier load screen.

*Clicking on any wiki page now automatically plays Morrowind's theme song.

Valve or Blizzard

Still in development.

I totally did this for the blog quest.

Posted by Yummylee

<3 Abyssfull approves of this blog +99 ...My BioWare styled comment.
Posted by Sweep

ahaha thats fucking awesome :D
 
I especially liked the Blizzard and Bethesda ones

Moderator
Posted by OmegaPirate

Haha - made my laugh through my hangover - thank you!!

Posted by j_meyer_13

Fucking awesome is right... well done, mate.

Posted by sarahsdad

Funny stuff. Thanks for the laugh

Posted by SinGulaR

Nice. No. Awesome :)
Posted by BronzDragon

Quite good, if I may say so.

Posted by JayDubya

Very good!

Posted by dprabon

Dang this is incredible! How did you think of all this?

Posted by MattyFTM

Awesome stuff. All funny and all true.

Moderator
Posted by jonfresh

hype

Posted by Duder_Me

Valve
Still in development. Haha hah ahahaha!

Posted by shakra

Blizzard, this quest requires a beta access key.

Posted by Red12b

awesome

Posted by dudeglove

I love you