The anniversary of the King's glorious birth has come once again.

The suave, daring, unrivaled King of Video Games. He is on an EROTIC quest to see if lesbians indeed have the goods. BEWARE, the Moon.

Let us once again celebrate my birth!.......That's really all there is to say, isn't there? You post congratulations for my emergence from a vagina, we all eat cake, and everyone shares a good laugh. EXCEPT NOT THIS TIME. I aim to interrupt these traditions with a gift of my own. To you. Specifically, the gift of my not-so-glorious voice in my first ever video review. It seems as good a time as any, and we probably need something to make this an actual milestone. Anyway, on with the show.

(Hopefully, I didn't fuck up the last part of those traditions.) Well, with my gift to you out of the way, I expect reciprocation. After all, Alex already gifted me with the power of The Wolf, so I expect no less of you. Get to it, my subjects.

41 Comments
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Edited by CaLe

It was my birthday yesterday, along with Adam Sessler. Anyway, Happy Birthday. I celebrated yesterday by... oh, I didn't celebrate it at all. Dammit! Learn from my mistakes, VGK!

The video is much too somber for my liking, but well made nonetheless. The music kinda drowns out the voice towards the end though.

Edited by TheManWithNoPlan
Edited by CrystaljDesign

Love the video, it was harrowing and I could almost feel how terrible the controls must be for the game!

Posted by Video_Game_King

Birth? I assumed you've always existed and simply manifested yourself with this site's inception.

In a way, that's true, except not at all.

Love the video, it was harrowing and I could almost feel how terrible the controls must be for the game!

They're a lot worse when you're using a 360 controller.

Posted by pyromagnestir

Heh. A gift, indeed. And to think on my birthday I didn't give you anything... Now I feel like a dick. :(
Then again you didn't get me anything on my birthday either. What's up with that?!

Posted by Video_Game_King

Then again you didn't get me anything on my birthday either. What's up with that?!

I don't even really know when it is. I'm guessing May 26?

Posted by pyromagnestir

I don't even really know when it is. I'm guessing May 26?

Why would you guess May 26? That's an oddly specific or random guess.

But no, it was actually earlier this month.

Posted by Mento

Here you go:

No, I don't get it either.

As for videos, I'm not quite at the "showing them to other people" stage yet, so you're definitely ahead. One 'a these days, though...

Moderator Online
Edited by Nekroskop

I don't think I can get Anita to get into a cake, but happy birthday anyway, King.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@mento said:

No, I don't get it either.

Me, neither. Wouldn't you rather have Sailor Neptune as a healer?


As for videos, I'm not quite at the "showing them to other people" stage yet, so you're definitely ahead. One 'a these days, though...

Not as much as you'd think. I originally intended this to be a Quick Look, but none of my runs ever maintained good commentary for too long. Then it somehow became this.

I don't think I can get Anita to get into a cake

It's better that way. I have to imagine that she'd be pelted with cupcakes as soon as she popped out, and I'd be thoroughly confused by it all.

Posted by JasonR86

@video_game_king:

Happy birthday. So how old are you? You could say 15, 35, or 65 or any other number and I'd believe you.

Posted by Animasta

Today is my mom's birthday as well!

do you have anything to say to me KING

Posted by Video_Game_King

@jasonr86:

376 years old today.

@animasta said:

Today is my mom's birthday as well!

do you have anything to say to me KING

Animasta, I am your mother.

Posted by JasonR86
Posted by chiablo

You can tell someone is under the age of 25 when they still care about birthdays.

Posted by pyromagnestir

Since you won't clarify I did some research and now have 3 working theories:

  • You secretly suspect I might be someone who was born on May 26. Possibly English footballer Ashley Vincent, or R&B sensation Lauren Hill, or Matt Stone, creator of South Park (if so, thank you, but no, no I'm not...)
  • You think my birth may have had something to do with British Guiana gaining independence. Or perhaps the European community adopting the European flag. Or perhaps a 7.7 Earthquake in Japan which killed more than a hundred people and injured thousands.
  • Or you just picked a random ass date.
Posted by Video_Game_King

  • Or you just picked a random ass date.

Pretty much this one.

Posted by pyromagnestir
Posted by Klei

@cale said:

It was my birthday yesterday, along with Adam Sessler. Anyway, Happy Birthday. I celebrated yesterday by... oh, I didn't celebrate it at all. Dammit! Learn from my mistakes, VGK!

The video is much too somber for my liking, but well made nonetheless. The music kinda drowns out the voice towards the end though.

Hey it was mine too! I had one heck of an evening.

Edited by McGhee

I liked the video and appreciate the tone you are going for. But I think you need to weird it up even more. I'm sure that's something you can do. Interested in seeing more if your Royal duties permit.

Posted by Video_Game_King

@mcghee said:

Interested in seeing more if your Royal duties permit.

I already have quite a few ideas.

But I think you need to weird it up even more.

That will no doubt become this.

Edited by JackSukeru

Happy Birthday King!

My gift to you is a cleaned up version of the stream of conciousness that transpired in my head as I was reading this thread:

  • I'm scared and weirded out by the idea of hearing the King's voice.
  • It's actually not so bad.
  • Youtube sucks for me lately with all these crashes.
  • It's sad to not celebrate birthdays, even a little.
  • Bobo's Theme makes me think of the Endurance Run and now I'm sad.
  • Pretty sure Sailor Moon spent a whole season casting some sort of healing spell at some point. Man, now I kind of want this, why!?
  • Anita Sarkeesian covered in cream.
  • Also otherwise naked.
  • Licking off cream from a naked persons body is supposed to be this very sensual thing, but cream by itself is kinda gross.
  • Sweat is salty.
  • I still have a picture of pyromagnestir's face among my pictures somewhere. I deleted it, but it came back together with every other picture I had uploaded when the site was relaunched and now I can't figure out how to remove any of them.

Have a nice year King! I wish you luck on your quest for the goods, or the knowledge of the existence of the goods, or whatever!

Online
Edited by Aegon

It was the King of Pop's birthday yesterday. Surprised google didn't do anything for it.

Posted by Marcsman

All hail the King ( happy birthday too)

Posted by pyromagnestir

  • I still have a picture of pyromagnestir's face among my pictures somewhere. I deleted it, but it came back together with every other picture I had uploaded when the site was relaunched and now I can't figure out how to remove any of them.

I will haunt you for the rest of your days.

Posted by Video_Game_King

  • I'm scared and weirded out by the idea of hearing the King's voice.
  • It's actually not so bad.
  • Youtube sucks for me lately with all these crashes.
  • It's sad to not celebrate birthdays, even a little.
  • Bobo's Theme makes me think of the Endurance Run and now I'm sad.
  • Pretty sure Sailor Moon spent a whole season casting some sort of healing spell at some point. Man, now I kind of want this, why!?
  • Anita Sarkeesian covered in cream.
  • Also otherwise naked.
  • Licking off cream from a naked persons body is supposed to be this very sensual thing, but cream by itself is kinda gross.
  • Sweat is salty.
  • I still have a picture of pyromagnestir's face among my pictures somewhere. I deleted it, but it came back together with every other picture I had uploaded when the site was relaunched and now I can't figure out how to remove any of them.

What strange thoughts these are. Perhaps that should be the focus of the video reviews: random stream of consciousness madness.

Posted by Warfare

Happy Birthday.

Posted by mlarrabee

It's also Cameron Diaz' birthday today.

Sorry, VGK.

Priorities.

Online
Posted by JackSukeru

@jacksukeru said:
  • I still have a picture of pyromagnestir's face among my pictures somewhere. I deleted it, but it came back together with every other picture I had uploaded when the site was relaunched and now I can't figure out how to remove any of them.

I will haunt you for the rest of your days.

Σ(゚ロ゚」)

Online
Edited by Aetheldod

What lunacy is this???? D: see this is why we shouldnt welcome aliens ... even if they live next to us .

Happy b day VGK >:(

Posted by Video_Game_King

What lunacy is this????

Pretty sure you're thinking of my last video review.

Also:

Edited by Slag

And thus another year comes to Pass for the King in his glorious reign. Let the people's jubilation sing throughout the land.

One year closer to death, one year closer to rebirth

Eternal is his reign punctuated by periodic rejuvenation.

Posted by falserelic

Happy Birthday Kingy.

Edited by TruthTellah

Well. That was something. I do suppose you sound as I expected, and your delivery fits with your style.

Happy Birthday, VGK.

Edited by AlexanderSheen

Happy Birthday, King. Happy Birthday, Vincent ;P

Posted by Jeust

Happy birthday man! I hope you enjoyed it!

Posted by GreggD

Smooches, Your Majesty. <3

Posted by Video_Game_King

@greggd:

Damn it. Now I want to watch that episode with the school play. Hopefully, you do, too.

Posted by jiggajoe14

Posted by Ravenlight

I celebrated your birthday by celebrating my birthday. You're welcome.

Edited by Video_Game_King

I celebrated your birthday by celebrating my birthday. You're welcome.

And I celebrate your birthday by celebrating my unbirthday.

WHADDYA THINK OF THAT!?