Sociable people - How can you also be video game players?

  • 61 results
  • 1
  • 2
Avatar image for azteck
Azteck

7415

Forum Posts

5

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 2

#51  Edited By Azteck

@OfficeGamer said:

@Azteck said:

I simply choose to not make my life revolve around games. They're fun and all, but make it something you enjoy rather than something that defines you as a person.

Hmm, interesting. If I do that I'll just become... this dude who goes to college and sits around smoking a cigarette or doing homework. Nah video games define me as a person :$

Spin it around though. Anything can sound boring if said in that way, instead of being a college student who meets cool people and learns interesting things, you're just a dude sitting on the sofa with a controller. See what I mean?

Avatar image for raven10
Raven10

2427

Forum Posts

376

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 27

User Lists: 5

#52  Edited By Raven10

First off, your friends seem really shallow. If all you can talk about are chicks, beer, and politics then you probably need some new friends. Not that those are bad subjects, but there is a lot more to life than that.

I'll try to give some actual advice too. I have friends who love watching people play games. For those people just pick an interesting game and they will watch it. Those types of people aren't that common though. Sometimes I get my parents to watch me play games. My Dad enjoys some games but my Mom doesn't at all. So I go out of my way to choose games that have a major focus on linear storytelling. My Mom enjoyed watching me play Metal Gear Solid a bit, and she really enjoyed watching me play Uncharted 3. The key I think is to choose games where the characters talk a lot even during gameplay. Uncharted is always delivering story. So even when I'm in a firefight, chances are Nathan Drake is spouting some quips non-stop. I also turn the difficulty to easy so that my parents don't have to watch me die a lot.

If the game is pretty complicated make sure to play it by yourself first. No one wants to watch you struggle with controls or get stuck on a puzzle for half an hour. Know what you are doing in advance so that watching the game is more like watching a movie. In the end, though, it is usually smart to not play single player games at parties or other social events. I do this with just my parents when we are bored some night. Play single player games when you are by yourself, and multi-player games when in a social setting. The fun of most games is playing them. Since the people watching aren't playing they will generally not enjoy themselves very much. Some people do and it is lucky if you know some of those people. But in most social situations I would suggest actually directly interacting with other people.

Avatar image for branthog
Branthog

5777

Forum Posts

1014

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 2

User Lists: 0

#53  Edited By Branthog

People have different interests. I was a jock, growing up. I was an unusually successful wrestler (also, Judo) for over a decade. However, I spent the time between matches with a stack of index cards and graph paper, up in the bleachers, designing D&D campaigns. And since being focused on wrestling meant I was always practicing, competing, or working out before school, leaving early from school, and missing the end of the school year, it meant never having a chance to be social -- so I also read a lot.

And in my late teens, I dropped much of the reading, writing, and D&D stuff and got in a lot of trouble with girls, while being social (married girls much older than myself, an abortion, tattoos, run-ins with the cops while generally being one of a troublesome crowd, etc).

Then, I became an adult and the older I got, the less time I had for any of these things. The only time I really have for reading is when its work related. I don't have time to be sociable and most of my friends and colleagues have become married and saddled with kids and other obligations that make *them* less sociable (and kind of boring, when they are). So video games are something quick and convenient that you can easily access without too much setup, too much investment, or any travel. They're a quick and easy break and a way to decompress without the complications of other things.

And, as you get older, you do tend to socialize less. You make fewer friends (in my case, that's unfortunate, because I also didn't make many friends growing up, due to the time I had to dedicate to sports and the fact that I dropped out of high school to begin my career). Your friends (and you, sometimes) get wrapped up in your obligations and drift apart. Especially if you're a guy. There are people I consider "friends", even though we've only seen each other once in the past decade. That's just how guys are.

So I don't see how games have anything to do with not being social. You can be social and like games, the same way you can enjoy reading and like games. Or enjoy sports or building things and liking games. The same way you can enjoy women and like games.

Any supposed limitations of one interest imposed on another interest is less about some sort of conflict between the two and, likely, more indicative of the specific personality of the individual. I happen to like video games and I'm no longer very social. That doesn't mean you can't like games and be social. That means that all my friends grew up and got busy and, as an adult who works full time, I don't have a chance to meet or get to know new people. But I have time for games here and there. Unrelated things that happen to be spokes of my wheel. Other people -- generally probably younger -- surely easily play games all afternoon for much of the week and then go hang out with their buddies and spend a couple nights a week with a girl they're dating or whatever.

Now, if you're specifically asking about being social with other people who enjoy video games -- I don't know what to tell you. Most of the people I know don't play video games anymore, if they ever did. Most of the people I work with are even older than I am. I know one guy who plays a lot of League of Legends and another who doesn't play games, except that his kid got him into Guild Wars 2. But I don't think any of these people have collections of games at home and spend chunks of their time playing them. They spend their time working, then sleeping, then doing chores around the house and driving their kids to soccer or driving them out of state to look at colleges.

Video games don't have to be your social thing. They can be the thing you enjoy on your own and you can find other things to do with people. However, my one piece of advice would be to do it while you are young, because you won't have much time for it once you're in your twenties and thirties -- and once you're in your twenties and thirties, it's probably kind of creepy to be going around trying to make other twenty and thirty year old friends, so you only have the limited stockpile you entered adulthood with.

Avatar image for deathbywaffle
DeathByWaffle

780

Forum Posts

1515

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 1

User Lists: 2

#54  Edited By DeathByWaffle

I don't think it's too hard to balance gaming and having a social life, but I suppose it depends on your personality. I mean, it isn't always a bad thing if you don't want to be out with people all the time - that's just who you are. As long as you have a couple good friends that you see on a regular basis, you are fine. There's nothing wrong with not going out to crazy parties all the time.

Avatar image for mnzy
mnzy

3047

Forum Posts

147

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#55  Edited By mnzy

To me it's become kinda weird in the other direction. Everybody I get to know better and become friends with is atleast somewhat into games. I'm not sure if it's the type of person I work with the best, or just everybody is a little bit into games now. A bit of both, I guess. Anyway, I would try to meet people who are also into games? Can't be that hard.

Avatar image for aterons
Aterons

207

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 1

#56  Edited By Aterons

I don't really get the question...

If you are trying to ask "How do you socialize if you spend so much time playing games ?", you can:

a ) spend less time playing games

b ) find friends that enjoy the games you play

c ) find hobbies/interests related to the games you play ( kinda cheesy but sometimes do-able )

Avatar image for kazona
Kazona

3399

Forum Posts

5507

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 3

User Lists: 6

#57  Edited By Kazona

Your issue has nothing to do with being (or not being) sociable, it's a matter of not having the same (level of) interest in games.

Avatar image for akrid
Akrid

1397

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 2

#58  Edited By Akrid

As far as finding people to talk about games with - y'all be typing on the internet. It's a wondrous thing that lets you communicate with anyone in the entire world. And these forums are certainly good for that, but if you want a slightly less impersonal interaction with fellow duders in our chat - or fully personal on our mumble server - we have a nice little community over here that loves games, and occasionally likes to talk very heatedly about them. I'm certainly not suggesting that it's a replacement for, y'know, physical friends - but it certainly sates my need for video-game based discussion. Join us! Come one, come all.

Avatar image for officegamer
OfficeGamer

1119

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 0

#59  Edited By OfficeGamer

@Akrid said:

As far as finding people to talk about games with - y'all be typing on the internet. It's a wondrous thing that lets you communicate with anyone in the entire world. And these forums are certainly good for that, but if you want a slightly less impersonal interaction with fellow duders in our chat - or fully personal on our mumble server - we have a nice little community over here that loves games, and occasionally likes to talk very heatedly about them. I'm certainly not suggesting that it's a replacement for, y'know, physical friends - but it certainly sates my need for video-game based discussion. Join us! Come one, come all.

Wow that sounds awesome! Who made this?

Avatar image for akrid
Akrid

1397

Forum Posts

0

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 2

#60  Edited By Akrid

@OfficeGamer: started a Bad Company 2 thing and then a BF3 thing, and then like more things happened and here we are!

We took a break on the events for the holidays, but we'll have some more up soon.

Avatar image for colourful_hippie
colourful_hippie

6335

Forum Posts

8

Wiki Points

0

Followers

Reviews: 0

User Lists: 2

#61  Edited By colourful_hippie

Is this thread supposed to be directed to the people who have to fill the void with their voice because silence makes them insecure?