They suck the life out of the living to feed the dead.

I'll put a stake right through their heart as I buy their next home console and enjoy the few pleasures they bring. I will drink upon the living to kill the dead. My dead, my feeling and need for Nintendo.

Goddamn it, Claude, if you come at my women folk with your pointy teeth and vampire beard, so help me God, I will go Van Helsing on your ass.

@Sparky_Buzzsaw said:

Goddamn it, Claude, if you come at my women folk with your pointy teeth and vampire beard, so help me God, I will go Van Helsing on your ass.

To kill Dracula, I have to become Dracula. Claude as Abraham Van Helsing.

@Claude:

OK. I forgive you this time, so long as you follow in the fine vampiric footsteps of Leslie Nielsen and the bearded Jewish Van Helsing that was Mel Brooks. I accept no substitutes. OK, I accept any substitutes other than those two, but still - imagine if that movie wasn't mediocre and use that for an actor's toolbox. Otherwise, I stake you!

Ah, Bach. Most people don't realize that behind the "let's introduce a scary mansion" intro part, there's actually a pretty good piece of baroque music.

Don't ever change, Claude.

Behind the layers of ridiculousness, my boy Claude has something here.

Claude needs to start writing for whatever the trusted video game news site these days is.

I don't think Wii U can provide sustenance, but you would be the one to test it.

@Video_Game_King said:

Ah, Bach. Most people don't realize that behind the "let's introduce a scary mansion" intro part, there's actually a pretty good piece of baroque music.

Thanks King.