Congratulations to StarFoxA for correctly pointing out Fourside as being the 4th town in Eagleland, the small country. Part Onett, Twoson, and Threed.
If you don't wanna be spoiled, come back after you finish Earthbound!
The Dalai Lama in Earthbound form.20. Earthbound's version of me.
The Dalai Lama of Earthbound happens to the Talah Rama, a man who lives with many, many monkeys. It is loosely based on my life as a spritual leader who lives under the desert with primates levitating in the air just meditating all day long. Talah Rama is a little weird like myself, but he's got a beard so that cancels the weirdness.
19. No, I'm the 3rd strongest!
The Guardian Diggers rule the gold mine in the Dusty Dunes Desert, but theri self-confidence is somewhat lacking. Each of the 5 moles inside claim to be the 3rd strongest guardian in the mine. It's true that they have identical stats, but couldn't one at least claim to be #1? It's not fun being average, moles.
18. Mushroomhead.
Whenever I have a mushroom growing on my head, I get really disoriented and stupid... or maybe I'm only imagining it after chowing down on some shrooms. Anyway, Ness will face off against evil mushrooms while will occasionally slap a fungus on your head. The only cure is to simply sell the mushroom for profit. So you can turn it into a positive! Neat, I mean awesome!
17. Act annoying, get $50.
Ness might be the savior of the world, but he can also act like an annoying kid when he wants to be. For example, a man at the hotel in Twoson is minding his own business and Ness walks up to him to talk. Bug him for a while and he'll eventually get pissed off and hand you $50 just to stop. Free money is always awesome.
16. It's like comparing apples and oranges.
Orange Kid is dreamy, cool, totally hip. Ladies love Orange Kid. Apple Kid is hideous, stinky, and kind of a dork. So who will be the one you can count on? Certainly not Orange Kid, that narcissistic bastard. Apple Kid is eager to help out whenever you need him and he is clutch. Whenever you have a seemingly impossible obstacle in your way, Apple Kid comes up with some insane device to help with your quest. Fuck Orange Kid... he can suck a lemon-flavored dick. Apple Kid is your man!
15. Unorthodox enemies.
Instead of explaining how these enemies are different than your standard RPG enemies, here is a list of names of some of the enemies you'll face in the game. The enemies include the following: Enraged Fire Plug, Spiteful Crow, Dali's Clock, Unassuming Local Guy, New Age Retro Hippie, Cranky Lady, Over Zealous Cop, Filthy Attack Roach, Farm Zombie, Manly Fish, Manly Fish's Brother, Scalding Coffee Cup, Robo-pump, Crazed Sign, and Mad Taxi. Not a wizard or imp in sight. No dragons either, but you do get to fight a Bionic Kraken.
Mmm... trash burger.14. Someone threw away a perfectly good burger away.
Think about the eclair scene in Seinfeld... George Costanza sees an eclair sitting in the garbage on top, only one bite out of it. George grabs it, someone sees it, totally embarrassed. Ness finds burgers in the garbage, we rejoice. What a crazy world we live in. By the way, this may or may not count as a Seinfeld reference. Depends on how you look at it.
13. Man builds maze, man becomes maze.
Brick Road is a guy who is not totally satisfied with his simple maze located in Winters. He wants to become the next big dungeon, literally. Fast forward to Scaraba where Ness and the crew meet up with the new and improved Brick Road, a multi-story dungeon chock full of baddies, prizes, and accomodations. Brick Road did not just build the dungeon, he became one with the dungeon. The best part about Brick Road is the brief period after you finish his maze where he joins your party and kicks serious ass. Those UFOs are no match for a living, breathing dungeon.
It's a zombie circus.12. How to survive a zombie invasion.
Giant Bomb and zombie invasions go hand-in-hand and the same is true with Earthbound and zombies. Yes, Earhbound does have its very own zombie invasion that you must end. The town of Threed is a perpetually dark, mysterious place when you first enter and the living dead are causing mayhem in the streets and keeping people in their homes hoping for the invasion to blow over. Unfortunately, zombies are tough to defeat in mass numbers, especially when you only have a baseball bat, frying pan, and a non-lethal gun to use on them... and that's where the always handy, somewhat smelly Apple Kid comes in. He came up with the only foolproof way to stop a zombie invasion, paper that attracts and stops zombies in their tracks. It's like fly paper except you swap bugs for the undead. The sea of semi-dead zombies you encounter is hilarious to see and... you really can't make this shit up.
Please release it in America.
11. Breaking the 4th wall.
Earthbound is not just a game in the real world, it's also a game in the game of Earthbound. The Earthbound references are numerous: Onett's own Captain Strong found Earthbound to be hard, Brick Road gives you some advice on how to be successful in Earthbound, and there's a building in Fourside where the APE team is working hard on that sequel we here in the West never got. Games that reference themselves? Always welcome.
Tomorrow, the top 10... in part Runaway Five!
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