As an American and an avid (American) football fan, maybe I can add some plain reasons as to why I don't enjoy soccer (which is how I will be referring to it for the remainder of this post).
1) Scoring: Yep, it's been mentioned. And yes, the single score in a 1-0 game is going to be pretty exciting when it finally happens. But how long do I have to sit through people endlessly kicking the ball back and forth with no hope of scoring in order to see that point? And yes, in basketball there is too much, making individual scores meaningless for the most part. I think there is a happy medium between meaningless scores every ten seconds and only one score through an entire game with nothing but watching guys running around chasing a ball to fill the rest of the time. In football, scoring is rare enough that it is always hugely exciting, but never so rare that the game becomes a drag. Also, in football, every single play, even the simplest running play, is potentially a scoring opportunity. Watch some highlights from guys like Frank Gore, Chris Johnson, and Adrian Peterson, and tell me you can't get excited to watch someone like that.
2) Specialization: Soccer players are great athletes, but they would never last a season in the NFL. Essentially every player, except the goalie, has the exact same skill set - running and kicking the ball. Maybe an oversimplification, but you get the point. In football, every single player has a unique specialty that only a few other people on the team, if any, are capable of performing. Powerful lineman battle in the trenches, speedy receivers and corners are in a constant game of cat and mouse, bruising linebackers make hits, finesse running backs find holes in the defense, and of course the immensely talented quarterbacks run the show. Not to mention punters, kickers, return men, and everyone else who contributes to the game. It's like a well-crafted RPG.
3) Strategy: The biggest reason that I LOVE American football is the amount of strategy that goes into every single game. Maintaining an offense in a four down system is one of the most complicated but beautifully simple things. Call me a dumb American, but I'm just not seeing that in soccer. The ball changes hands constantly, and true "offense" is limited to a few seconds in which you have possession of the ball within twenty yards of the opposing goal. With football, if it's 4th and short you can pound it right at them, or you can fake the handoff and hit someone on a quick crossing route. It's constant risk-reward calculations, and at the end of the game the strategies in football are unlike any other sport. Watching a skilled quarterback run the two minute drill is the most exciting thing I have ever seen in sports, ever.
So yes, I consider soccer to be a kid's sport for the most part. Simple to understand the rules, and a good way to get exercise, but definitely not what I would choose to watch as entertainment. I think that if it were broadcast around the world, a LOT more people would come to this conclusion. The problem is that football doesn't get any exposure outside the States. I would be curious to find how often those of you who are in Germany, Spain, South America, the Netherlands, etc. actually get the opportunity to see a game.
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