A serious comment on Obama's economic policy.
By Video_Game_King 4 Comments
(Will not be found in this blog.) Seriously, I review games in this thing. Why would you expect me to comment profoundly on modern day politics? Because I have a humorous video on Obama's stance on the economic crisis? You obviously don't know me. In fact, the only reason I posted that video is because it provides a nice liaison into my next game: Power Strike II. How so? Well, this game takes place during the Great Depression,
where the economy has taken such a nosedive, that not only has the world converted to a three decimal currency, but the protagonist has to hunt down sky pirates to make end's meet (apparently, he's able to buy a plane and trillions of bullets and bombs, but still needs money). I'm not sure how this game can pull off the whole 1930s thing when you're clearly shooting down typical shooter fare, which is a fancy way of saying "THIS IS SCI-FI." So the story sucks, but does that matter? This is a shooter, and has anybody cared about the story in a shooter, ever? Of course not. You play it for the insane shooting sections. So how are those? Pretty good, if a bit unbalanced. Like the other Aleste games, y-wait, I forgot. This is sort of an Aleste game. See, the first Power Strike was just Aleste on the Sega Master System. However, the sequel had no equivalent in the Aleste series. Yes, odd, but in the end, it was just another Aleste game. Back on track, like in the other Aleste games, there are 6 power-ups throughout the game, each one able to be powered-up. However, unlike the other Aleste games, you get to choose what weapon you start the game with. Fine in theory, but in practice, it just lets you more quickly realize that half the weapons are crap. Just stick with burner for most of the game and grab all the little options along your way, ignoring any numbers that aren't 3. Granted, a few of the other weapons are OK, but taken as a whole, it's pretty unbalanced. Fortunately, the game makes up for this with the classic adaptive AI that ZANAC made so famous. If you rock, the game starts to hate you, throwing a billion bullets your way; if you suck, it doesn't care, placing peashooter penguins every 9 miles. OK, fine, so the bosses are ridiculously easy, but that's only when you know which weapons to use, and if you get them. Example: some prick of a boss has an invincible shield in front of him with a few holes. Easy if you have napalm, bad if you have anything else. Wow, this is getting a bit off topic. How about I just end the review by saying that this game is good, but could be better? That sounds like a good way to end it. Oh, wait, the award. *rummages through attic for award* How about this dusty high school football trophy I stole from those asshole jocks back at my last high school reunion? Will that work? WILL IT!?
*sigh* It won't, will it? Fine, let's forget Power Strike II, and move onto a more mediocre game. Would that be "mediocrer?" I guess that's besides the point. The point is that The Great Circus Mystery isn't that good. The game starts off with Minnie and Mickey heading off on a date to the circus. However, Goofy comes along and tells them that there's no circus, for some random reason. Rather than just go somewhere else on their date or find out precisely why there's no circus, Mickey proceeds to go on a quest to beat the piss out of Pete. He's just that kind of person. He's also the type of guy who gets others to believe what he does; along the way, all his Disney friends offer up costumes that somehow make it easier and more fun to kick in Pete's rib cage. These include the Ninja Ghostbuster, the Mountain Climber, the Big Boy Cowboy, and the....well, that's it, other than just plain Mickey. The costumes don't have many battle applications, except the Big Boy Cowboy one, which is awful. Sure, you can shoot enemies at a distance, but it requires ammo and controls like the Kuribo's Shoe. There's a reason why that was limited to one level. The other costumes, as I mentioned before, suffer from being stuck in just platforming. Most great platformers manage to combine the character's abilities into both getting from level to level AND beating up bad guys. Why do you think Sonic was so popular? However, the combat comes off as a bit easy. While the bosses range in difficulty, most of them are really easy. The final boss is a joke, even if you don't shoot at him. You can avoid his attacks quite easily, and hitting him is also easy. The game's also easy, but I fear that'd be a stretch, since I'm such an awesome gamer. But wait! I said this game was mediocre, not bad! Surely there are some good things to it? Well, aside from decent graphics and charming music, there is co-op play. Apparently, Mickey wanted to turn beating Pete's guts out into a date, so he brought Minnie along, who was more than willing to cooperate. I haven't played it due to my lack of friends, but I'll assume it's good. So I give it the Every Game I Have Not Yet Played Award for Assumed Quality. Now here's something I found odd: I've been playing a lot of Capcom games as of late. This game, Breath of Fire III, Final Fight 2, Shantae, what the hell's wrong with me?
Don Mario said:
Yes, what is wrong with you?Huh? What the crap are you doing here?
Luigi said:
The Don has had problems with your latest video game choices, Your Highness.Don Mario said:
Yes, why have you played so many Capcom games when there still many fine Mario games you have yet to touch?Like what? Mario Party? That'd be a great review: "I played it when I was 10, but nobody wanted to play the extra modes I thought were cool." Ooh, REALLY investigative and deep.
Don Mario said:
How dare you speak me in such a tone, you insolent little shit! Assassinate the king, my goons. *goons shoot at me, miss*You know, I'm getting pretty damn tired of this. I'm not going to take your crap anymore.
Don Mario said:
Oh, what do you plan to do? Play some of that Sega backwash?Sonic said:
Damn straight, the man's gonna play some Sega.Don Mario said:
You stay out of this, you neon methhead!Sonic said:
Like I have to listen to you, ya fat piece of crap! *calls members of gang to him, enters heated gun fight with Don Mario Clan*...*slowly walks out of room*