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    The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

    Game » consists of 30 releases. Released Nov 11, 2011

    The fifth installment in Bethesda's Elder Scrolls franchise is set in the eponymous province of Skyrim, where the ancient threat of dragons, led by the sinister Alduin, is rising again to threaten all mortal races. Only the player, as the prophesied hero the Dovahkiin, can save the world from destruction.

    Skooma

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    Aetheldod

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    #51  Edited By Aetheldod

    The other day I found a cave below Dragonsreach .... the dudes there had some skooma I just had to have it ... I believed it was the Jarls stash , but the shit was cut >:3

    fucking nord bandits and their half assed skooma

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    Brackynews

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    #52  Edited By Brackynews

    Friend of mine likes to mix some skooma into his pre-ban nirnroot for the extra buzz. The warning label is pretty clear about not doing it, but you know they put that shit on there to get people hooked. I only tried it a couple of times. Couldn't sleep for 60 hours. I'd stand there and wait and time would pass slower. Never again man. Eyeballs dry right up, mistook an orc for a dark elf and they hate that. Got me 5 armor levels though, once I could stand up again.

    Wait, do dragons have pockets?

    Nope. That's why they always fly around looking for their keys.

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    mosdl

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    #53  Edited By mosdl

    @selbie said:

    @Soapy86 said:

    Skooma leads to intimacy

    Side effects may include: nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, headaches, erectile dysfunction, severe mood swings, mead addiction, cravings for skeever tails, blurred vision, dragons. Please consult your alchemist before consuming.

    Just to make it clear, those are the side effects of intimacy. Skooma just makes me want to go butterfly picking.

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    mosdl

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    #54  Edited By mosdl

    @Th3_James said:

    In the rare event of a dragon lasting more than 4 hours, seek immediate medical help to avoid long-term injury.

    I had a dragon last at least 2 weeks at the Mage College before the body went away. I may be already dead then...

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    Gizmo

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    #55  Edited By Gizmo

    Damn, Son, you want to to get some of that Moon Sugar. Skooma ain't got shit on Moon Sugar, ho.

    Also, just found this on TESNexus;
     
    [Moderator Note: Picture deleted due to nudity.]

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    Th3_James

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    #56  Edited By Th3_James

    Woke up in Markarth after a 3 day binge, caught mud crab and skeever tail from Lydia.

    By the nine, know where to draw the line.

    SKOOMA, NOT EVEN ONCE.

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    PeasantAbuse

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    #57  Edited By PeasantAbuse

    @MattyFTM said:

    I'm playing Morrowind at the moment, and I'm having trouble offloading a load of skooma and moon sugar that I found somewhere. I have no idea where I got it from - I was probably stealing a bunch of shit to sell on and just clicked take all without looking at what I was taking. And now no shop keepers will even talk to me unless I drop my skooma and moon sugar on the floor first. It's valuable so I don't want to throw it away, and I don't intend on using it, but it's annoying.

    I'm pretty sure there is a Khajiit shop owner near the Mages and Fighters Guild buildings in Balmora that will happily buy your stash.

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    Buscemi

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    #58  Edited By Buscemi

    @Gizmo: Don't porn this shit up, man, that's not what the Skoomsh is about. It's about... other things... that don't involve.. those things.

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    jaycee13

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    #59  Edited By jaycee13

    @Th3_James said:

    If you smoke Skooma you a stupid mother fucker! known around Skyrim as the argonian clucka.

    Doin' that skooma with all the money ya got, sneak skill 100 searching for a piece of rock.

    SKOOMA SKOOMA!

    Hey man gimme a hit?

    SKOOMA SKOOMA!

    Yo man, Fuck that shit!

    SKOOMA SKOOMA!

    Argonian face!

    Yo dragon, Kick in the bass!

    You have not recieved nearly enough respect for the exellent use of NWA.

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    daiphyer

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    #60  Edited By daiphyer

    I am sipping Skooma while chewing on moon sugar like UH UH UH UH WHATCHU GONNA DO ABOUT IT?!

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    endaround

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    #61  Edited By endaround

    I only use skooma in legally sanctioned religious ceremonies. It's right there in the treaties man.

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    deactivated-5ea641329300b

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    My brother Faelian was an skooma addict. He moved to the Imperial City with his girlfriend.

    I haven't heard from him in a while, I wonder if he's okay...

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    VoshiNova

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    #63  Edited By VoshiNova

    Cocaine!!!

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    Ghostiet

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    #64  Edited By Ghostiet
    @MattyFTM said:

    I'm playing Morrowind at the moment, and I'm having trouble offloading a load of skooma and moon sugar that I found somewhere. I have no idea where I got it from - I was probably stealing a bunch of shit to sell on and just clicked take all without looking at what I was taking. And now no shop keepers will even talk to me unless I drop my skooma and moon sugar on the floor first. It's valuable so I don't want to throw it away, and I don't intend on using it, but it's annoying.

    Dude, you're the worst kind. You can fix people up with some shit and you don't, because you're so greedy.

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    Ninja_Welshman

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    #65  Edited By Ninja_Welshman

    Hi everybody. My name is Ninja, and I..... I am a Skooma addict....

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    Th3_James

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    #66  Edited By Th3_James

    The dragons in Skyrim are really a cleaver metaphor representing the rampant Skooma abuse in Skyrim.

    Fighting dragons is your character battling their own inner demons, and accepting that they have an addiction.

    Just when you think you are clean, you start seeing dragons in the distance. You may think you can avoid them, but they are always in the back of your mind.

    Skyrim: Chase the Dragon

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    CornishRocker

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    #67  Edited By CornishRocker

    @Th3_James said:

    The dragons in Skyrim are really a cleaver metaphor representing the rampant Skooma abuse in Skyrim.

    Fighting dragons is your character battling their own inner demons, and accepting that they have an addiction.

    Just when you think you are clean, you start seeing dragons in the distance. You may think you can avoid them, but they are always in the back of your mind.

    Skyrim: Chase the Dragon

    Puff the Magic Dragon's all over Skyrim, man. I know a few cats who can point you in the right direction.

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    Jazz_Lafayette

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    #68  Edited By Jazz_Lafayette

    Just a taste man, JUST A TASTE. I NEEEED THIS, BABY. I'll slay yo' dragon!

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    Aas

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    #69  Edited By Aas

    @Sauson said:

    My brother Faelian was an skooma addict. He moved to the Imperial City with his girlfriend.

    I haven't heard from him in a while, I wonder if he's okay...

    I'm sure he's fine. Say, do you have anything I can clean my dagger with?

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    fini_fly

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    #70  Edited By fini_fly
    @Mr_Skeleton said:

    There are two guys near the entrance to the General Goods store in Whiterun. One is fat,short and doesn't speak, talk to his friend he will set you up with the good stuff.

    Snoogans!
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    RubberBabyBuggyBumpers

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    i don't love the skooma but the skooma loves me.

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    cstrang

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    #72  Edited By cstrang

    You a cop? You know you gotta tell me if you are or else its entrapment...

    Fucking narcs, man...

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    Lifestrike

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    #73  Edited By Lifestrike

    Drugs are for bugs.

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    linkster7

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    #74  Edited By linkster7

    I haven slept for four fucking days GIVE ME MY FUCKING SKOOMA

    this would more funny it was less true

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    mosdl

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    #75  Edited By mosdl

    @FoxySaurus said:

    After ages of trying to find a game site I wanted to join I saw a link to this thread and immediately made an account.

    This is beautiful.

    Skooma is a gateway drug after all.

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    vaiz

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    #76  Edited By vaiz

    ENTRAPMENT.

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    ThePickle

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    #77  Edited By ThePickle

    Skooma? I don't need Skooma to have a good time!

    This message brought to you by W.E.A.S. (Wood Elves Against Skooma).

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    Undeadpool

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    #78  Edited By Undeadpool

    Excuse me, gentlefolk, I was wondering if you knew where I could score some of that sweet SKOOMA us drug-users are always going on about...just speak directly into my medallion here...

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    demarcon

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    #79  Edited By demarcon

    Man, if they just legalized skooma we wouldn't be having this mess in Skyrim, the stormcloaks and imperials would be friends, and the dragons would be too high to fly.

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    AlexAlterisio

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    #80  Edited By AlexAlterisio

    Shit man, you telling me Skooma ain't legal in Skyrim? Guess I'd better move that stash of 5 bottles I've got stored in Jorrvaskr. I'm going to be PISSED if I get back there and god damn Farkas drank all my dragon juice.

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    Gizmo

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    #81  Edited By Gizmo

    I pick-pocketed this Khajit dude who had a huge stack of Skooma, I then stole the lot and went through it right in front of him.

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    BasketSnake

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    #82  Edited By BasketSnake

    I wonder if you can mix skooma with poison...apply it to arrows and shoot people in the ass to watch them trip.

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    NegativeCero

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    #83  Edited By NegativeCero

    Gots to get that sweet, sweet refined moon sugar, dawg.

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    intro

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    #84  Edited By intro

    I found an Orc selling it on the side of a mountain lol. I TOLD him to give it to me and said no and tried to fight me about it. I used a legendary glass war axe and he had his fist.

    Needless to say, I got the Skooma.

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    buft

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    #85  Edited By buft

    My house in whiterun, find it in the chest near my alchemy lab,also got some nirnroot growing in my hydroponic room

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    Baal_Sagoth

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    #86  Edited By Baal_Sagoth

    Oh man, this has to be the funniest Skyrim thread in existence. Skooma and moon sugar - I love the stuff since I laid eyes upon the magnificent drug labs near Vivec!

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    AxleBro

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    #87  Edited By AxleBro

    CRIMINAL SCUM EVERYWHERE!

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    CL60

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    #89  Edited By CL60
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    BraveToaster

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    #90  Edited By BraveToaster

    I know this Redguard in Whiterun. She lets you lick Skooma off of her stomach. That bitch is wild, bro.

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    Metric_Outlaw

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    #91  Edited By Metric_Outlaw

    I once knew this Argonian who was way into skooma and he went on this fucking gnarly trip and swore his legs were goat cheese wheels. Next thing I know this fucker wakes up after eating off his own fucking legs...

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    Jayzilla

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    #92  Edited By Jayzilla

    I got high on that one time in Morrowind and ate a cliff racer while it was alive.

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    Dylabaloo

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    #93  Edited By Dylabaloo

    You all should be ashamed of yourselves, some people in Skyrim have a real stamina problem and actually need that skooma to get us from Morndas to Sundas! To Sithis with all of you!

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    august

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    #94  Edited By august

    Get you so high Khajit call my shit rockets.

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    Cloudleet

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    #95  Edited By Cloudleet

    Running around, stronger but dumber for 20 seconds is not normal. But on Skooma it is.

    Skooma. Not even once.

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    Owlhead

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    #96  Edited By Owlhead

    Man, I love me some skooma in the morning.

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    theguy

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    #97  Edited By theguy

    This is why I love Giant bomb

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    thellama042

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    #98  Edited By thellama042

    This is easily one of the best threads on GB.

    SKOOMA!

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    Lucifer

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    #99  Edited By Lucifer

    @CL60:

    As the 100th poster of this thread i just want to declare...Criminal scum, criminal scum all of you.

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    BlinkyTM

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    #100  Edited By BlinkyTM

    I snort moon sugar instead. Skooma is for milk drinkers.

    This edit will also create new pages on Giant Bomb for:

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