Sorry for the title, I just did not know what else to call it!
The past few weeks I have been surrounded by my friends and there partners. Even my last single friend
started a relationship the other day (how dare they!!!) Its made me realise that I have not had a proper
relationship in a long long time, and that I would actually quite like one. I just don't seem to be able to meet
anyone.
I wondered what you fellow bombers thing about the whole relationship thing? How did you meet your partner?
Or are you happy alone? Wondering if I should just wait for the "one" or if I should try throw myself out there a bit
more (god knows where though!)
Discuss! :D
Relationships: in one? Want one? etc
Was almost in one recently. She was indecisive/not good at communicating her feelings, so she basically hung me out to dry for over a month, making me very depressed all the while. Just ended everything last weekend, and though I would still very much like to be with someone, I don't think I'm in a good condition for a relationship right now.
I wondered what you fellow bombers thing about the whole relationship thing?It's probably not for everyone, but I prefer being in one.
How did you meet your partner?He was a security officer and I was a dispatcher. We were both seeing other people when we met. He used to give me backrubs in the office during the graveyard shift.
Wondering if I should just wait for the "one" or if I should try throw myself out there a bit more (god knows where though!)You don't necesarily know if someone is the one unless you're with them, and you can't be with them unless you try.... I dunno, we were pretty sure what we had was serious, but it wasn't until a good 4 or 5 years into it that I realized this was the person I was going to grow old and crotchety with.
Discuss! :DThe only other thing I want to point out is that being in a relationship isn't going to always be happy times. That's how life is. We have to work for the things we value. That's also why wedding vows include "for better or worse."
Seems as though whenever I'm not looking for one, opportunities pop up, but when I do, I get nothing. I've got exams in two weeks and a few things have popped up. God dommot.
Wondering if I should just wait for the "one" or if I should try throw myself out there a bit more (god knows where though!) Discuss! :DThere is no such thing as the one, the only way you are going to find out if a person is someone you want to be with is by getting to know them. The notion that there is one person in the world you are supposed to be with is perhaps the stupidest shit ever.
I wanted to be in one really bad a few months ago (and I still do) but I realized I'm still young and there's no need to rush into one (that probably wouldn't end well) and so I decided to enjoy the single life for a while.
I would like someone some day, but my life is so fucked up and pathetic that if I did meet someone that I actually cared enough about to want to try for I wouldn't. If I really cared for them, then I would want something better for them then to be with someone like me.
I'm more "out of one" than "in one" Like Vince, I too have been focusing on school but one Saturday this past winter I went to my schools library to study(which was a rare occasion). While I was chill-jamming to some Erik Mongrain (who was featured on a Whiskey Media Happy Hour) I a girl strolled in and I gawked uncontrollably. She was average height, blond, cute face and a nice set of big, beautiful...eyes. Well this library was vacant becasue of it being Saturday and all, so she could have sat in some empty corner to study without distraction. But she plopped down at the table right next to mine.
Well I looked like sheit; unshaved, haven't showered in like 3 days, and sporting a Green Bay Packer Hoodie. As I sat thinking of how I would "make my move" she kept dropping her pen and tapping her feet and it felt like she was doing so in my direction. So despite greasiness I decided to man up and hope that she would mistaken my appearance for rugged good looks. I waited for my opening to come...
She dropped her pen loudly and swore a little to loudly for a quiet library, this was my opening! "Hey its okay, everybody drops their pens every once in a while," I jokingly said trying to pull off an easy going smirk, all the while mentally face-palming my self furiously at the stupid opener. But that's all it took, we started chatting; at first it was school, then interests then plans for the weekend. She talked about video games and what games she liked playing, I played it cool knowing that freaking out on her about how much more video game knowledge I have would probably make her want to run away.
Long story short she ended up being a stage 5 cling-on and I had to end it for my own sanity. My grades had fallen, I was stressed out, and I didn't have any time for myself. So now we just get together every once in a while for some fooly cooly but besides that there are not many strings attached.
If you are looking for a relationship you've got to put yourself out there. The easiest is to go to bars and clubs with your friends because not only are the girls all dressed up and ready to mingle, but you get some liquid courage and hopefully a few faithful wing-men to take care of the cock-blocking chicks that are just jealous that you approached their friend and not them. Fair warning though is you have a very low probability of meeting a decent chick out on the town.
But if you can't go to, or don't like the bars just look for the ladies at other local hangouts. Places like Barnes and Nobels or coffee shops a pretty good because the atmosphere is easy going and the you can meet some very interesting girls. The conversation starters are pretty good too because based on the situation you can ask her what book shes reading or what coffee shes drinking. You always have the chance to get lucky and meet a girl completely at random in like a laundry mat. Just the fact that you met at an odd place like that makes it more fun and less pressure because you have the mid set of "what the heck, I'll never see this person again if I make myself look like a fool."
Besides those places, just go to your normal hangouts and keep an eye open. If you go to tabletop gaming store just keep an eye out for the curios ladies that come in and want to learn D&D. (Chances are too, that you are the coolest one in the store if its a tabletop store so having the balls to go up and talk to a girl really won't be an issue. Also the other nerds there will think you are god afterwords) If you enjoy going to the park with your friends, bring a frisbee and when a girl checks you out while your hanging out just toss her the fris and invite her to play.
The main idea of all this is to be as much of yourself as possible. I'm not saying completely nerding out on a chick on the first date, but saying the same jokes that you tell your friends and talking about your interests are key. Also don't worry about "what do I talk about when I go up to her" cuz it honestly doesn't matter. As long as your talking to her about any topic thats good because chances are you are making her day more interesting anyway. Start off with the easy stuff like school and stuff, then move onto what her interests are, then share something about yourself; but as long as you are asking her questions, the convo will go smoothly. You may not even get a word in about yourself if you ask the right questions, plus she will leave thinking you are a great conversationalist! Then after a good convo you will know if shes interested or not, then just ask her for her number so you can meet up again. You can hook her in by reminding her a a joke she found particularly funny during your convo or say that you would like to sit down and get to know her some more because she seems interesting. Tell her the truth.
So all an all. I don't suggest a relationship Like Vince said, that is if you want to concentrate on school and your own life. But if you still want one, go out and get it, you have to be the one that makes the first moves(girls like that, even if they deny you they still get a kick out of the fact the a guy approached them). Be honest, with her and yourself. And don't take it so seriously, life after all is just one big game.
GLHF
~ DV
I haven't been in a relationship for a while, and all the time that I'd like to be in one, I haven't found anyone that has serious potential.
There's this girl that i've been trying to get together with, but unfortunately she has a boyfriend, but still I know there's something there. I've been asking myself this question over and over again if I should just stop this whole thing right now, or try some more.
Married with kids..soo..doesn't really matter too much if I'm happy about it (I'd say I'm 50/50 on the happiness).
@Daveydave: Don't ever "wait" for the one (unless you are talking about marriage). Get out there and get around as much as possible while you are young and single..because it won't last. By the time you hit the mid 30s, most people are hooked up. One of my friends is recently divorced. She's cute and nice, yet is having a hard time finding a non-loser boyfriend...I'm worried that she will end up settling for "good enough". Its unfortunate that my wife isn't down with the whole polygamy thing..but what are you gonna do.
Don't stress about it, but don't turn down any opportunities either.
Sure I want one, but the simple fact is that I have no way of sustaining one. I don't have a steady source of income, a cell phone, and I don't have a license or a car yet. I hope to get my license soon though.
@crusader8463: Hmmm..interesting idea. To teach my children about how discrimination is wrong, I should have one incredibly hot wife from each race...right?Only if you could you resist making a neapolitan joke every time you get in bed together.
I've never had a girlfriend in the thirty one years I've been alive.
Needless to say, I'm looking to break the streak.
#inb4gayjokes
#inb4foreveralone
In one. Eh, it was pretty good but I feel a talk is in order soon.This, pretty much.
Got out of one last fall and I'm not ready at all to be in a new one. It was a great one, but she had other plans for her life that really didn't include me. It was a toughie to get over since we had been friends for about 3 years before we finally went for it.
I'd like to be in one, but I rarely meet new people outside of my existing friends and I really do not think I'd be ready for one. Maybe someday :/
It's Not rocket science (but I'd say that maybe a scant few of the audience here might actually know rocket science).
Not in one, can't afford to be in one. Dates are expensive for a college student without a regular income.
@LordXavierBritish said:
I know someone who fucked a chair.I work at a moving company every summer. One day, with one particularly irate customer, I flipped a couch over to put the wooden feet back on her couch (the type you screw in to the bottom of the couch). The customer, who was already furious about every little thing (ex; she yelled at us for carrying to many boxes at once), yelled at me as I had just flipped the couch over, "You trying to have sex with my couch? Is that what you're doing?!?!?". She wasn't joking. This was her way at trying to get under my skin. I told her I only have sex with leather couches so her couch would be safe.
...I didn't get a tip.
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