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Mento

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Mento's Alternative to E3: Day 02

By Mento 5 Comments

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00  01 03
 
So, first of all I want to say that I need to stop starting sentences with "So,".
 
So, today we'll move onto the next not-at-all-related-to-that-whole-convention-doohickey topic of dead things. Of the many eclectic groups, settings and concepts that people choose to build video games around, dead things rank as one of the most popular. Unfortunately, the dead things in these cases are almost always zombies. I'm going to create a list of other types of dead things, and the video games that choose to base themselves around them instead of zombies. If no such game has yet to be created, I'll make something up. Hooray for dead things, everyone!
 
NB: I haven't lost a pet and gone into shock or anything, though your concern is touching. Just been playing more Dead Nation is all.
 

Ghosts

No Caption Provided
Ghosts are spooky, right? They tend to play around with our fear of the unknown, rather than our fear of being eaten by zombies. Unlike zombies. That's why ghosts are better. The other awesome thing about ghosts is that there aren't really any hard rules on how a ghost works, or how they can be killed, or even if they can be killed. Most ghost stories either end with the ghost as an invincible menace that just kills everyone, or as a redemptive arc where the ghost's reason for unlife is discovered and resolved and the ghost floats off happily into the.. post-ghost world. Aww.

Games: Well, let's see. You got the Proton-pack wielding New Yorkers, the vacuum-pack wielding also technically a New Yorker, at least a couple of games where you're the ghost. There's a few games where you don't know you're a ghost and it's a big spoiler, so maybe I won't link to those. There's also the (debatably) scariest game series of all time. So ghosts are fairly well represented at least.
 

Revenants

No Caption Provided
Revenants are usually depicted as skeletal undead, but have slightly more to them than your regular animated skeleton (which are too similar to zombies for the purposes of this blog.) The edge these guys have, is that they're basically undead Terminators. They absolutely will not stop until their chosen target is dead. This means regenerating tissue, hideously powerful combat prowess and the sheer fucking willpower to drag themselves out of the grave to take down the one that wronged 'em. Therefore they tend to be the bodies of once-powerful heroes brought down before their prime. If you see one coming, just let them pass, since they only attack their target and those in their way. Unless you are their target. In which case you're going to need Kyle Reese or an industrial crusher or something. Good luck!
 
Games: Well, there's the eponymous Revenant. He's just a resurrected dude, though. Revenants appear in both Dragon Age (both as extremely powerful undead, usually from the corpses of powerful adventurers) and Baldur's Gate 2 (as a dude who really wanted his knife back.) Really, though, anything where you play a dude come back to life to kill your killers counts. Including The Crow. That was a fun movie. This is now a Screened blog.
 

Mummies

No Caption Provided
Mummies are really just zombies in wrapping paper. But the whole Egypt mythology kind of elevates them as something slightly more powerful and sinister. They are deceased Pharaohs that lived millennia ago, especially embalmed to survive as long as possible, which makes them rather durable zombies if nothing else. If you believe those wacky Mummy movies, they have a few magical tricks up their considerable sleeves as well.
 
Games: Well, the stand-out would have to be Sphinx & The Cursed Mummy, where you play as both generic sword-wielding demigod hero Sphinx and as the Cursed Mummy, who is actually an unfortunate (once)-mortal prince. The Mummy sections are by far the best and most inventive, as you use the Mummy's immortality to repeatedly set off fatal traps to solve Tomb Raider type puzzles. Mummies, of course, have been regular enemies in many a D&D-esque adventure. Tip: If all else fails use fire.
 

Liches

No Caption Provided
Liches, though traditionally another synonym for walking corpses, have been upgraded by the D&D system to be ultra-powerful mages that have discovered the secret of eternal life if you're not too bothered about skin retention or appearances. Liches tend to be very determined individuals who have chosen to live forever for a specific purpose, and it's usually not something that will benefit those that are still living. If you're a regular RPG hero, this is the one undead thing you probably don't want to bump into. Except maybe a Dracoliches, because there's nothing that can't be made scarier by turning them into a dragon.
 
Games: While most games won't let you play as a Lich, since they're kind of incorrigibly evil, there are a couple. If you're playing as a Necromancer, (as, say, in Might & Magic VII) becoming a Lich is often the highest priority for your character. Strategy games that let you play as the nefarious side of an epic good vs evil struggle will often have a Lich commander too.
 

Ghouls

No Caption Provided
Here's what we know about Ghouls at this time:
  • They are very annoying.
  • They are not worth getting a penalty card over.
  • They like to play Risk.
  • They know "Tamabofu", or at least want you to believe they do.
  • They're friends with Teddie's brother.
  • They're going to meet you later on the next floor.
  • They welcome those whose hearts desire power.
  • They gonna get fused.

Games: None. Who the hell would want to play as Ghoul? Ghoul doesn't want to be Ghoul.
5 Comments

5 Comments

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Marcsman

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Edited By Marcsman

I like to play Risk. 
Does that make me Ghoulish?
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TehFlan

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Edited By TehFlan

I didn't see the Ghoul part coming at all and it was brilliant. Bravo, sir.

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Mento

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Edited By Mento  Moderator
@Oni: Oh, I can be very stubborn.
 
Tomorrow's attempt to distance myself from E3 2011 as far as possible: A list of consoles with awesome names.
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Oni

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I admire your dedication to these despite the fact that no one comments on them

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Mento

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Edited By Mento  Moderator

Jump to other E3 Blogs:
00  01 03
 
So, first of all I want to say that I need to stop starting sentences with "So,".
 
So, today we'll move onto the next not-at-all-related-to-that-whole-convention-doohickey topic of dead things. Of the many eclectic groups, settings and concepts that people choose to build video games around, dead things rank as one of the most popular. Unfortunately, the dead things in these cases are almost always zombies. I'm going to create a list of other types of dead things, and the video games that choose to base themselves around them instead of zombies. If no such game has yet to be created, I'll make something up. Hooray for dead things, everyone!
 
NB: I haven't lost a pet and gone into shock or anything, though your concern is touching. Just been playing more Dead Nation is all.
 

Ghosts

No Caption Provided
Ghosts are spooky, right? They tend to play around with our fear of the unknown, rather than our fear of being eaten by zombies. Unlike zombies. That's why ghosts are better. The other awesome thing about ghosts is that there aren't really any hard rules on how a ghost works, or how they can be killed, or even if they can be killed. Most ghost stories either end with the ghost as an invincible menace that just kills everyone, or as a redemptive arc where the ghost's reason for unlife is discovered and resolved and the ghost floats off happily into the.. post-ghost world. Aww.

Games: Well, let's see. You got the Proton-pack wielding New Yorkers, the vacuum-pack wielding also technically a New Yorker, at least a couple of games where you're the ghost. There's a few games where you don't know you're a ghost and it's a big spoiler, so maybe I won't link to those. There's also the (debatably) scariest game series of all time. So ghosts are fairly well represented at least.
 

Revenants

No Caption Provided
Revenants are usually depicted as skeletal undead, but have slightly more to them than your regular animated skeleton (which are too similar to zombies for the purposes of this blog.) The edge these guys have, is that they're basically undead Terminators. They absolutely will not stop until their chosen target is dead. This means regenerating tissue, hideously powerful combat prowess and the sheer fucking willpower to drag themselves out of the grave to take down the one that wronged 'em. Therefore they tend to be the bodies of once-powerful heroes brought down before their prime. If you see one coming, just let them pass, since they only attack their target and those in their way. Unless you are their target. In which case you're going to need Kyle Reese or an industrial crusher or something. Good luck!
 
Games: Well, there's the eponymous Revenant. He's just a resurrected dude, though. Revenants appear in both Dragon Age (both as extremely powerful undead, usually from the corpses of powerful adventurers) and Baldur's Gate 2 (as a dude who really wanted his knife back.) Really, though, anything where you play a dude come back to life to kill your killers counts. Including The Crow. That was a fun movie. This is now a Screened blog.
 

Mummies

No Caption Provided
Mummies are really just zombies in wrapping paper. But the whole Egypt mythology kind of elevates them as something slightly more powerful and sinister. They are deceased Pharaohs that lived millennia ago, especially embalmed to survive as long as possible, which makes them rather durable zombies if nothing else. If you believe those wacky Mummy movies, they have a few magical tricks up their considerable sleeves as well.
 
Games: Well, the stand-out would have to be Sphinx & The Cursed Mummy, where you play as both generic sword-wielding demigod hero Sphinx and as the Cursed Mummy, who is actually an unfortunate (once)-mortal prince. The Mummy sections are by far the best and most inventive, as you use the Mummy's immortality to repeatedly set off fatal traps to solve Tomb Raider type puzzles. Mummies, of course, have been regular enemies in many a D&D-esque adventure. Tip: If all else fails use fire.
 

Liches

No Caption Provided
Liches, though traditionally another synonym for walking corpses, have been upgraded by the D&D system to be ultra-powerful mages that have discovered the secret of eternal life if you're not too bothered about skin retention or appearances. Liches tend to be very determined individuals who have chosen to live forever for a specific purpose, and it's usually not something that will benefit those that are still living. If you're a regular RPG hero, this is the one undead thing you probably don't want to bump into. Except maybe a Dracoliches, because there's nothing that can't be made scarier by turning them into a dragon.
 
Games: While most games won't let you play as a Lich, since they're kind of incorrigibly evil, there are a couple. If you're playing as a Necromancer, (as, say, in Might & Magic VII) becoming a Lich is often the highest priority for your character. Strategy games that let you play as the nefarious side of an epic good vs evil struggle will often have a Lich commander too.
 

Ghouls

No Caption Provided
Here's what we know about Ghouls at this time:
  • They are very annoying.
  • They are not worth getting a penalty card over.
  • They like to play Risk.
  • They know "Tamabofu", or at least want you to believe they do.
  • They're friends with Teddie's brother.
  • They're going to meet you later on the next floor.
  • They welcome those whose hearts desire power.
  • They gonna get fused.

Games: None. Who the hell would want to play as Ghoul? Ghoul doesn't want to be Ghoul.