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Giant Bomb & Cards Against Humanity Team Up

And humanity doesn't stand a goddamn chance.

In case you missed it during our PAX Prime 2012 panel, we recently announced a loving, trust-based partnership with our friends behind the incredibly distasteful parlour game Cards Against Humanity, with a limited-edition Giant Bomb-themed expansion pack as the expected fruit of this eldritch coupling. For those not already familiar with Cards Against Humanity--either from its multiple Thursday Night Throwdown appearances or its generally increasing cultural profile--it's essentially Apples to Apples or Mad Libs, but calibrated with Swiss precision for a nuclear brinksmanship level of offensiveness. So, you know, right up our alley.

As with the core Cards Against Humanity experience, crowdsourcing ideas for new cards for our expansion pack is an important part of the process, which is where you come in. There's a special page already up at Cards Against Humanity Dot Com where you can submit your stupid ideas--ideas that we will, no doubt, mock derisively when the Giant Bomb and Cards Against Humanity staffs (staves?) meet up to decide which cards will make the cut.

Feel free to submit any of your favorite Giant Bomb references, or just whatever funny, absurd, random, offensive thing that springs to mind, though know that one of our main goals here is to make an expansion worthy of one of our favorite games that'll be fun to play, even for those who don't know why that deer is wearing a wrestling mask, and don't care. (Example: me!)

Either way, whoever wins, we lose.

187 Comments

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Roomrunner

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Edited By Roomrunner

I wish we could have been told when the deadline is.

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Bravestar

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Edited By Bravestar

I hope you guys test the results on a TNT

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Phat2

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Edited By Phat2

Mine:

-banana

-a dog

-penis

-a giant bomb x DDDDDDDDDD

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Video_Game_King

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"What's that leaking out of me?"

That's really the only idea I have. Oh, wait:

"The Mongolian army"

Look, I don't have a lot of options.

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warchief

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Edited By warchief

BATMANBATMANBATMAN

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Xeirus

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@Moncole said:

"Nothing is bigger than Patricks hair except ________"

Patrick's penis?

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Xeirus

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@Nerolus said:

@Deadmanforking:

No Caption Provided

Ryan and I at Pax 2012. Sporting my Cards Against Humanity contest shirt.

You were at the bottom of the soup bowl?!

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Tylea002

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Edited By Tylea002

The only half decent one I could think of was "The Look and Sound of Perfectâ„¢."

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Aegon

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Edited By Aegon

Can we only send one message with a particular email. Or can we keep messaging as long as the dumb ideas are flowing?

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TheMasterDS

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Edited By TheMasterDS

A Dragon Fucking A Car or Dragon Gold comes to mind.

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WindowColours

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Edited By WindowColours

Submitted a bunch, but my best one was:

"Getting hit by a missle while climaxing"

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MaxxS

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Edited By MaxxS

Hey everyone suggesting Giant Bomb-related cards, don't get your hopes up. They talked about not wanting Giant Bomb jokes/memes in this game on the last podcast.

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Beb

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Edited By Beb

I submitted:

"I'm a ____ and this is _____"

"a box full of terrible foreign candy"

"WUB WUB"

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JoeyRavn

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Edited By JoeyRavn

"Triple H's hair/mane"

Somebody needs to create a forum thread so we can all throw ideas in an orderly fashion. Well, as orderly as we can.

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ghost_cat

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I still have that movie on blu-ray. MUST WATCH AGAIN.

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JamieOD

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Edited By JamieOD

After this week's episode of the Bombcast, I bet hundreds of people have suggested "CHINA DON'T CARE."

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MeatSim

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This can only turn out great. Time to start brainstorming card ideas.

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Zelnox

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Edited By Zelnox

Ressentiment

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LegendaryChopChop

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@MaxxS said:

Hey everyone suggesting Giant Bomb-related cards, don't get your hopes up. They talked about not wanting Giant Bomb jokes/memes in this game on the last podcast.

Just thinking about an entire deck of GB meme cards makes my skin crawl. GB is my favorite site on the internet but that would be dreadful.

I really thought when they read out all of those CAH things last week that it was a little... unfunny?

I can't imagine how unfunny an entire deck of forced meme cards would be.

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ervonymous

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Edited By ervonymous

Getting attached to internet personalities.

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Tennmuerti

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To quote a timeless philosopher:

Black: "From the fine makers of ______ "

White "CUNT"

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TheAdmin

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They should really have two form boxes on that page - one for white and one for black cards.

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Presto

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Edited By Presto

Is "___________ vs. ____________: Whoever Wins, We Lose" a card yet?

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BonOrbitz

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@Moncole said:

"Nothing is bigger than Patricks hair except ________"

Liam Neeson's cock.

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VVaffley

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Edited By VVaffley

*mumbling while rocking back and forth in the fetal position*

Please have a Luchadeer card.

Please have a Luchadeer card.

Please have a Luchadeer card.

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MrCosmo

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Edited By MrCosmo

Will there be any way to make these card sets available for us over in the UK? Amazon won't ship the current sets outside the US.

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Bollard

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Edited By Bollard

If "Cunt" doesn't become a white card then I'm not buying.

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Lyfeforce

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Edited By Lyfeforce

I know for a fact that it would not work, but damn I wish Will Smith's face (the image, not the text) could work as a white card.

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ch3burashka

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@UnderWing said:

I did the necessary submissions of "Face and Neck Stabbings", "Mysterious Fox", "Peter Molyneux", "Peter Molyneux's Balls", and "Unconditional Love". Low-hanging fruit, mostly, but they needed to at least be on the list.

How about "Low Hanging Fruit"?

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plague102

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Are you guys going to air the card screening process live?? Because that would be awesome!

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BlatantNinja23

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Edited By BlatantNinja23

I'm sure others have posted it, but I feel like "I'm a Wizzard, and even I think _______ is fucked up" is a must.

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Tesla

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Edited By Tesla

Will Smith's cum face

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Popogeejo

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"Excruciatingly graphic sonic fan fiction"

"Fungineer[ing]"

"Thus game knows me too well. How well? It knew I dreamed about ____!"

Midnight Brown's new album: [blank][blank]

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dabe

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Edited By dabe

"cunt"

That is all.

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osuzoo08

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Edited By osuzoo08

please Incorporate " Sniper Boner " and I will be sold

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GuardianKnux

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Edited By GuardianKnux

I've already submitted a bunch! So fun coming up with good stuff.

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AlexanderSheen

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Edited By AlexanderSheen

Submitted this as a black card:

Giant Bomb is the world’s largest editable video game database. We're into _______, _______, and viewers like you.

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Sessh

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Edited By Sessh

Spent about an hour submitting stuff by now.
 
This is gonna be great.

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rjayb89

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"Losing your grip mid-wipe" was my sexy, sexy idea.

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the_great_skenardo

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A car trunk full of Hot, Glistening Tripe

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Lyfeforce

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Edited By Lyfeforce

I'm personally proud of "A smelly blanket".

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ninjalegend

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Edited By ninjalegend

White cards:

"The three wise men."

"A crying stripper."

"Cranial rectal inversion."

"The Duke."

"Euthanasia."

"Turduckin."

"One of the top ten."

"Internet trolls."

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Sharpshooter

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Edited By Sharpshooter

@MrCosmo said:

Will there be any way to make these card sets available for us over in the UK? Amazon won't ship the current sets outside the US.

Yeah the CAH site only has listings for America and Canada. I want to get a set of these for my Christmas party this year and they don't seem to ship to Ireland. I know I can just download the pdf and print a set but I have a personal thing about never taking a quality product for free.

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dutchbear10

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I look forward to having my ideas mocked by the Giant Bombers.

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Mars_Cleric

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I'm a _______ and that is ______.

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ABK_92

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Nothing makes my nipples lactate more furiously than ____.

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JEdge

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"Peter Molyneux's big, glorious, liver-spotted balls."

Submitted.

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meatsack

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@Begilerath said:

@Hooded said:

I sleep like a baby after bathing in a tub full of _______.

Peter Molyneux

's liver spotted balls

EDIT: GODDAMN, didn't get to last page before replying, and I reply right after! Sorry jedge!

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MattyFTM

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Edited By MattyFTM  Moderator

Pretty sure all my suggestions are terrible.

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RagingLion

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Even though I would be unlikely to ever (want) to play this I being compelled to submit a shedload of stuff to this. It may become my hobby whenever I have a spare moment over the next weeks to add another idea.

I'm quite proud of "I reckon the mushrooms that power-up Mario are a metaphor for ________. " among others.

@Atlas said:

Black card ideas:

  • "It sucks when you look in the fridge, and all you have to eat is..."
  • "Instead of organised religion, I live my life according to the teachings of..."
  • "You can take the ____ out of _____, but you can't take the (second blank) out of (first blank)."
  • "I almost dropped out of college to pursue a career in..."
  • "I can't help but think about ____ while having a conversation with ______"
  • "The first time I saw two men making out, my first instinct was to..."

White card ideas:

  • Giving over to the dark side.
  • An unnecessary hemorrhage.
  • Forgetting to bring your phone to the bathroom when you poop.
  • Defying the laws of physics.
  • George Brett's pine tar bat.
  • The swollen breasts of a woman pregnant with quintuplets.
  • A white man trying to dance.
  • Sleep apnea.
  • Trying to find a good pizza place at 3am.
  • The Rape of Nanjing
  • A vagina with teeth.
  • Mastication.
  • Female circumcision.
  • Flipping off a bus full of disabled children because it cut you off.
  • The euthanasia debate.
  • Beating an autistic child at his own game.
  • MC Hammer
  • Realising that you're outnumbered by people of the opposite race.
  • The Jewish Diaspora.
  • A woman's gay friend.

EDIT: Didn't read the whole post, if I had I'd know that this isn't the place to submit ideas. But here's what I came up with, if you think there are any winners in there let me know and I'll submit the best ones.

A lot of those are pretty good. I think "Mastication"would probably go down well with most people that would play this but many others too.