Let's time warp back to 1998, usenet, and a 19 year old Jeff

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#1 Edited by Metal_Mills (3001 posts) -
https://groups.google.com/forum/?fromgroups#!topic/rec.games.video.sega/DypFf6GKqHM 
 
No Jeff, not THAT forum. Though it was hilarious and I'm sure you still are the nacho champ. This is something else. The story of 19 year old well documented moron that is Jeff Gerstmann, the Tekken player and writer for biased websites!

These are old usenet posts. Plenty more at the link.
 

Who the hell is Jeff Gertsman?


 

some 19 year old Tekken player that videogames.com got to do the review for
vf3tb.


 

yeah he's the same asshole that gave tekken 3 on the psx a 9.9!  Maybe
Tekken 2 deserved a 9.9, but 3?  With all that slowdown?  Hell no.  BTW, I
let him and the main editors have it.

Somehow he forgot that the game runs in a higher resolution than the $10,000
arcade version, as well as has nicer looking textures.  But really, I knew
after reading the review (actually vf3 gameplay bash) he was a tekken drone.

The amazing thing...he gets paid to write that crap.  Un-Fuc*ing-believable!


 
 


> I cannot believe what I am reading!  This Jeff Gertsman bastard absolutely
> laced into it!  He gave the game an overall score of 7.1.  Graphics...8  Huh?

>    All the reviewer does is rip on the game.  Nothing really positive was
> said.  Nevermind the fact that these ARE the best graphics of any home game.
> Is media bias going to kill the DC before it even hits these shores?
>
I wouldn't worry about it. Gertsman is a well documented moron when it
comes to reviews (try his MGS review)



 

Hey, this same idiot gave Tekken 3 a 9.9.  What a joke.  It's graphics and
gameplay a perfect 10?  Mr Gerstmann, may you burn in hell for working at a
website that impressionable people read and take for granted your review.  I
think EGM should be renamed PSM + Nintendo Power...


He is a reviewer at a rather biased gaming website.  By the way, I think
the editors of that site are getting irate with us talking about them like
this. :)  Good.  Maybe they will see that we aren't fooled by their
"journalism", and clean up their act.


#2 Edited by Xymox (2088 posts) -

Words... I'm without them.

Nice find. What's with the "google groups" though? Surely that wasn't around in 1998... Must've come with a site purchase? 98 was still when everyone went to altavista and yahoo... right?

Oh, usenet. Nvm.

#3 Edited by Vegetable_Side_Dish (1728 posts) -

He gave Zelda a perfect score, completely overlooking all of its
graphic glitches, including glitches in texturing, repeating textures,
and some obscene frame rate hits and slowdown.

Gerstmann is so pro-N64 that it isn't even remotely funny. His
agenda is almost as inflated as his ego. I consider anything written by
him to be immediately discountable.


And then 8.8 happened. 
#4 Posted by ReyGitano (2467 posts) -

Well, some things never change, other than the fact that grammar has substantially degraded on the internet since then.

#5 Posted by AjayRaz (12431 posts) -

this is awesome. whining on the internet hasn't changed that much years later

#6 Edited by Zaccheus (1795 posts) -

@ReyGitano said:

Well, some things never change, other than the fact that grammar has substantially degraded on the internet since then.

My thoughts exactly. I wish people would write like that these days, would make the internet a much more pleasant place.

#7 Posted by crazyleaves (646 posts) -
@ReyGitano

Well, some things never change, other than the fact that grammar has substantially degraded on the internet since then.

Good point. I was wondering why I was feeling old.
#8 Posted by thebeastwithtwobacks (140 posts) -

HA. hes taken his lumps for sure

#9 Posted by Hailinel (24974 posts) -

Even back then, angry internet people couldn't spell Jeff's last name.

Online
#10 Posted by ajamafalous (12007 posts) -
@ReyGitano said:

Well, some things never change, other than the fact that grammar has substantially degraded on the internet since then.

Hah
#11 Posted by ThunderSlash (1754 posts) -

I can't find his Virtua Fighter 3 review, but this is the Tekken 3 review mentioned.

#12 Posted by ToastMan (94 posts) -

One of the posters on that thread is called: Andrew Ryan...

#13 Posted by hidys (1029 posts) -

The more things change...

#14 Posted by MaxxS (201 posts) -

@Zaccheus said:

@ReyGitano said:

Well, some things never change, other than the fact that grammar has substantially degraded on the internet since then.

My thoughts exactly. I wish people would write like that these days, would make the internet a much more pleasant place.

I'm fine with it now. It's easier to discount the idiots, because their poor grammar just functions as an automatic tip-off.

#15 Posted by CL60 (16906 posts) -

Jeff even caused Internet shitstorms in 1998.

#16 Posted by MarkWahlberg (4606 posts) -

@Metal_Mills said:

Un-Fuc*ing-believable!

wat.

#17 Posted by AlisterCat (5593 posts) -

I would have hated the internet then too if I knew any better.

#18 Posted by alternate (2711 posts) -

Did you also post this on GAF? - 'cause if not someone has been copy/pasting.

#19 Posted by Nightriff (5096 posts) -

Got a good laughing reading that but what is DC?

#20 Edited by Butano (1741 posts) -

Oh man, the way these guys talk about the Dreamcast makes it sound like Apple fans waiting for the next iProduct launch, which sounds like the next coming of Christ.

JP
Post reply
12/10/98
{SNIP}

Okay, this is also one of the guys who badmouthed Fire Pro Wrestling,
said PSX XMen v. SF isn't 'that bad' and says the same about MSH v SF
for PSX>

What you have to remeber about Videogames.com/EGM is that it is an
American mag meant to stimulate the U.S. market. They mention imports,
occasionally tell you how to get them, but they never cover them in
depth. C'mon WWF Warzone better than FP?

I guarantee when the Dreamcast becomes avaliable to the U.S. market in
late 1999. It'll be the greatest thing since sliced bread in the
opinion of most major mags...

Kevin
Post reply
12/10/98
Did you even read that guy's message? I don't believe you're so
stupid and naive as to believe that so long as the games are good,
the DC will succeed no matter what. Then again, you seem to be a
PSX-fan with a Sega-hate-on trolling a Sega ng, so maybe you are.

So in case you missed the point of the other message, which you
definitely seemed to have, let me try to spell it out for you.
The poster was implying that, once again, a Sega game widely hailed
as one of the greatest ever was reviewed in an US media outlet by
someone whose review was so off base that either he was reviewing
the wrong game or purposefully gave a negative slant to his review.

And contrary to what you might believe, more than anything else,
the media drives sales and perception. As long as your games SEEM
good with a few minutes play (eg, flashy graphics, easy to pick up
even if ultimately shallow) and you have great media coverage, then
you can succeed. The Playstation is evidence enough of that. So the
fear of media bias comment is utterly justified. The Saturn rarely
got a break in the press, even with some of the greatest games ever
made.

And if "talk is cheap" why is Sony spending tens of millions of
dollars every quarter advertising their games? They certainly seem
to think it's worth spending money and effort on. I guess only when
it comes to Sega then talk is cheap, media perception means nothing
and anything bad that ever happened to Sega is always solely the
fault of Sega. Is that right? Is that what you're trying to say?

Lord save us from these morons.

Internet history is hilarious.

#21 Posted by Soap (3596 posts) -

@Nightriff said:

Got a good laughing reading that but what is DC?

Dreamcast!

This was a great read btw, I'd love to actually hear what Jeff has to say about this old stuff and what he thought of it at the time.

#22 Posted by Butano (1741 posts) -

@Nightriff said:

Got a good laughing reading that but what is DC?

The Dreamcast...

#23 Posted by Dezztroy (804 posts) -
@Nightriff said:

Got a good laughing reading that but what is DC?

Dreamcast.
#24 Posted by emem (1968 posts) -
@Hailinel said:

Even back then, angry internet people couldn't spell Jeff's last name.

Hehe.
#25 Edited by Sooty (8082 posts) -

Tekken 3 was a very good game.

and the Dreamcast was such a good console, damn EA for shunning it (or whatever happened) and Sega not using DVD.

#26 Posted by ShaggE (6479 posts) -

He gave Tekken 3 a 9.9!? *cancels membership, starts building an effigy* RAAAAAAGE! That game was 9.8 at most!

Sigh... internet war... internet war never changes...

#27 Posted by Metal_Mills (3001 posts) -
@alternate said:

Did you also post this on GAF? - 'cause if not someone has been copy/pasting.

Nah, I found it on there though. And of course I brought it over to here, this IS Jeff's website after all.
#28 Posted by DukesT3 (1918 posts) -

This is great!

#29 Edited by Akyho (1658 posts) -

I cannot help but laugh at the highlighted part's. So this is what it is like to be Jeff Gerstman...or a reviewer any day of the week.

Here's a copy of the email I sent to him:
Obviously you're either mad or on crack; possibly both. You'd have to
be an extremely green player to
think that becoming good doesn't reap rewards of any magnitude. I'm by
no means one of the best, and
yet button mashers such as yourself couldn't touch me. You see, it's a
thinking man's game, and there's
no place for your type. Why'd they pick you to do the review anyway?
You don't like Virtua. I'm no
Sega-suck-up, but I'd say you have to be some sort of
Nintendo-geek(since your MGS review was
almost as screwed up). I've played the arcade version of VF3(not TB)
extensively, and am currently
playing VF3TBDC, learning the differences. The graphics get an 8? How?
These are obviously the
highest quality graphics on a console by a mile. The shortcomings are
hardly noticable. The shadows are
the biggest thing, but even they don't stick out unless you happen to
have it in a 2-player match, with no
second player. Are you under the impression that being hard on the
game makes you seem better? I
suppose you're also cynical, mistaking it for intelligence, as so many
do. The music is typical AM2 style.
It is my opinion that it's actually very good(from VF1 to Daytona,
etc.). You probably don't like Army of
Darkness either, do you(the movie)? The voices are great too. Awesome
overacting. I give up. The
whole thing's an intellectual step over your head. It'd be better for
you if you just accepted your level,
and didn't swim in deep water.

You would think he was talking about the grant of world hunger being given to a soup kitchen, than a man guaranteed to end world hunger now.

I can only imagine this when they actually played it. We.....we....we dont sound like that? Do we?....I HOPE WE DONT!!! OH GOD!!!

#30 Posted by jakob187 (21676 posts) -
#31 Posted by Demoskinos (14883 posts) -

Lolz never change internet.

Online
#32 Posted by MideonNViscera (2257 posts) -

Man, I didn't even have the internet in 1998 haha

#33 Posted by Dixavd (1358 posts) -

Is this the same group of people Jeff said eventually found his home address and started sending him death threats?

#34 Edited by Sumbog (487 posts) -

This is hilarious, oh internet, your the best.

Edit: Also I like how all the Sega guys are calling him a Sega hater, and then later Nintendo guys say Jeff's a Nintendo hater.

#35 Posted by Metal_Mills (3001 posts) -
@Dixavd said:

Is this the same group of people Jeff said eventually found his home address and started sending him death threats?

Yep. Maniacs.
#36 Posted by Getz (3029 posts) -

@Sumbog said:

This is hilarious, oh internet, your the best.

Edit: Also I like how all the Sega guys are calling him a Sega hater, and then later Nintendo guys say Jeff's a Nintendo hater.

He's got an agenda man!

Online
#37 Posted by Mento (2567 posts) -

Jeff did say it was mostly Sega people that gave him the most trouble in the past. They probably still blame him for Dreamcast not living up to its potential.

These are amazing though, like the Atari emails Patrick linked to recently. Nothing ever changes.

Moderator Online
#38 Posted by NegativeCero (3005 posts) -

@AjayRaz said:

this is awesome. whining on the internet hasn't changed that much years later

Exactly what I was thinking. This is depressing.

#39 Edited by Bribo (605 posts) -

Joseph M Leonard : "Who the hell is Jeff Gertsman?"

When did Geoff Keighley changed his name?

#40 Posted by Ryuku_Ryosake (213 posts) -

Have you ever seen a picture of this guy? He looks like Barney from the Simpsons.

The '98 net has the dopest dises.

#41 Posted by c_rakestraw (853 posts) -

@Mento said:

Jeff did say it was mostly Sega people that gave him the most trouble in the past. They probably still blame him for Dreamcast not living up to its potential.

These are amazing though, like the Atari emails Patrick linked to recently. Nothing ever changes.

Atari e-mails?

#42 Posted by MattyFTM (14394 posts) -

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Moderator
#43 Posted by Village_Guy (2598 posts) -

@MattyFTM said:

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Damn you! I was going to post that, but I found myself reading the stuff thoroughly - otherwise I had posted that before you...

#44 Posted by ManMadeGod (1567 posts) -

I always knew Jeff was a tekken drone. This was all the proof I needed.

#45 Posted by believer258 (11949 posts) -

@Nightriff said:

Got a good laughing reading that but what is DC?

Probably Dreamcast, if someone hasn't pointed it out already.

Anyway, nothing's really changed apart from some people being hilariously wrong. I'd bet that a good number of those people have since made a Gamespot account and at least looked into GiantBomb.

#46 Posted by Rhombus_Of_Terror (2111 posts) -

Lol this is just like the "Young Snide" thing that happened on TNT a few months back.

#47 Posted by BestUsernameEver (4825 posts) -

@ReyGitano said:

Well, some things never change, other than the fact that grammar has substantially degraded on the internet since then.

Not really, when people complain so harshly, in this case bashing Jeff, they want to make it void of any errors. That way a pro Jeff person doesn't point out their grammar, and we all know once someone points out a typo, your argument is invalid.

#48 Posted by TheHT (11383 posts) -

@AjayRaz said:

this is awesome. whining on the internet hasn't changed that much years later

it's crazy! there i was, just a lad enjoying my N64 thinking everyone must love video games, meanwhile assholes on the internet were at each others throarts, just like there are now.

#49 Posted by IkariNoTekken (990 posts) -

I'd love to time warp back to '98 but for the revolutionary music, not for usenet or a 19 yr old Jeff.

#50 Posted by PeasantAbuse (5138 posts) -

@C_Rakestraw said:

@Mento said:

Jeff did say it was mostly Sega people that gave him the most trouble in the past. They probably still blame him for Dreamcast not living up to its potential.

These are amazing though, like the Atari emails Patrick linked to recently. Nothing ever changes.

Atari e-mails?

http://www.textfiles.com/games/ATARIMAIL/

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