Milkaholics Anonymous

Once upon a time, Nintendo of America (and Europe) refused to let any reference to alcohol slip past the censors in order to maintain their highly prized family-friendly veneer. Their solution to getting around the problem where characters were visibly intoxicated was to have them be groggy on all manner of benign beverages, creating such euphemistic conditions like "milk high", "caffeine buzz", "getting all spry on tapwater" and "fuck you, I can quit drinking orange juice whenever I want! You aren't my parole officer!".

Of course, as this bizarre and really stupid turn of events passed into gaming lore, you'd eventually see even more games reference and spoof this censorship practice. I'm just going to list a few games that "dodged the draft" and some more games that made fun of them for doing that thing with all the booze that they... did... with it. (Sorry if this ends up sounding a bit muddled - I might've had a few sodas at lunchtime.)

[Thanks to VGK for the suggestion.]

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5 Comments Refresh
Posted by Video_Game_King

I feel I should chime in with what inspired me to inspire you: Napple Tale. One of the locations of the titular Napple Town is a milk bar with a real cow bartender, this being a fairy tale and all.

Posted by Sparky_Buzzsaw

Love this list.

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Posted by medacris

I'd add Pokémon here, but I don't know if Lon Lon Milk is an analogy for alcohol. I did always consider it a Zelda reference, though.

Posted by Pepsiman

In my own official canon, the milk in Majora's Mask comes from the aliens that invade the ranch. Clearly.

Edited by Video_Game_King

Does Project X Zone count? There's that line at the end of the second boat chapter where the guys talk about hitting up the bars, and Estelle says she'll stick to milk.