1. Never stand in front of enemy cars.
 
2. To cancel Brick's rage skill go into the menu.
 
3. I don't care how useless it is, the Boomstick is beyond groovy.
 
What have you learned?

Run away from Badmuthas'

5. Even if a green weapon has better stats than a purple one you still feel dumb using it.
 
6. Maniacs like setting themselves on fire.

Small robots named after a particular venereal disease are annoying as all hell.

7. Men can have enormous torsos but a tiny waste

7. Cortana is still a threat. Seriously, I didn't half expect the Gravemind to start popping up onto my screen.

10. Never trust a green flashing diamond when it tells you where to go.
 
11. Bobbleheads are very valuable in the future.

12. In the future, maps will be replaced by a collection of blue lines. "Now do I go around that line, or under it? Fuck it. Next quest."
 
13. 'Lady Parts' are in fact perishable.

14.midgets always fly backwards when they shoot a shotgun

15. Pistols always have blades attached to them like it's completely normal.

16. Safety first.

17. Tiny women can melee a car into oblivion. 
18. Rocks are slippery

"Never trust a green flashing diamond when it tells you where to go."

19. Gyro Spiderants are really just Sonic the Hedgehog wannabes. 
 
20. Having gigantic muscles is like wearing a bulletproof vest. 

21. You can't flush ammo or money down the toilet.

23. Female scientists who are slowly going crazy can say some pretty funny shit.

24. Giant versions of things take forever to die.

25. Wheels is better than heels, drivedon'twalk.

25. In the future, vending machines will carry weapons and ammo, talk to you, and restock themselves every 20 minutes.  
26. Holy crap! It shoots rockets!

27. Weapons in the future will forget they need to reload.
28. A single bullet can cause a human body to turn into a pile of goo

29. shooting someone will heal them ( aslong as you know them offcourse )
 
30. in the future backpacks will be able to carry up to 42 things ( weapons, shields etc. ) from small pistols to big and large bazookas and sniper rifles, without looking bigger then a standard backpack
 
31. in the future humans will have enormous physical strenght ( to carry those special 42 slot backpacks, 4 weapons, grenades, a shield and a class mod with them) 

grtz Allen :D

32.  Pandora appears to be the galaxy's landfill.  Really, why is there so much garbage everywhere?  Mountains of trash piled up all over the place.  The Wall-E bots aren't doing their job.  Perhaps they are having too much fun "dancin'!"

33. Having Nine Toes and 3 Balls makes you cooler!

34. being a girl with boyish hair will ruin your chances of getting a car.

35. when you are on your deathbed if you shoot somebody your wounds will heal.

37. Pandora Post Office: delivering ammunition, and ONLY ammunition, since 2157.

38. Safest Place for all your guns and ammo - unlocked cases outside

39. Nine-toes has 3 balls.

40. Bullets grow without water.

41. Strange ladies will effortlessly be able to rape your mind.

42. You can always trust the gun at your side. 
43. Hawks lit on fire are awesome. 
44. Punching someone sufficiently hard enough in the chest can make all of their limbs fall off... which is awesome.

45. Don't trust smiling AIs. 
46. Birds can channel the elemental power of "Explosion".

47.  If at first you don't succeed, jump onto a roof or get them stuck in a pit and fire away.

48. The bus driver is totally Roman.

39. No matter how big and angry something is, your car will instantly eviscerate it. 
40. When in doubt, call a Soldier. 

" 48. The bus driver is totally Roman. "

There are a shit load of LOOTS and KILLS to be had. Plus, 4-player online gaming is the sickest, c'mon.

50. People eat ammuntion for food...and can't digest it.

51. Guns become better if you use them a lot.

52. Badass pychos might be bullet sponges, but they squish real nice under your left front tire.

53.  The Boom Stick can kill you while aiming at a white, fluffy cloud.

You guys fucking suck at counting. Seriously.

39. In the future, when you die you will have the option to pay money to respawn. 
40. In the future, you will be able to sell stuff to vending machines.

Sledge is still not my friend...which is sad, because he has such a wonderful demeanor

54. 

55. Humans will lose their knack for small-talk at some point after the zombie apocalypse. From that point on it's all shit-talking through the forth wall.